Spook Your Commute: These True Crime Podcasts Will Shiver Your Timbers

April 27, 2017, 10:40 am

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It's no secret that true crime has an indelible place in the pop culture canon. The success of shows like The People Vs. O.J. Simpson and Making A Murder prove that no matter the cultural weather, the world is interested in criminal acts. New to this canon, though, are podcasts. The audio-only medium is new to the entertainment world in general — in fact, the word "podcast" is but 13 years old. The medium did not immediately take to true crime. For a while, it seemed newsy broadcasts like This American Life dominated the podcast world.

And then there was Serial. The WNYC-produced podcast sunk its teeth into a decades-old case that had been solved long ago, and it seemed that everyone was listening. (There are not one, but two excellent sketches parodying the podcast, which, if you ask me, cements its relevance.) Serial gave birth to a whole range of crime-themed delicious listening. Today, there's a track for every palate. Love comedy? We've got humorous crime podcasts. Love the details? This one is so thorough you'll feel like you just left a college class. Interested in only Hollywood murders? Oh, boy, there are bunches.

Ahead, find the top true crime podcasts on the market right now. We've separated them by category, so you can find the best one for your sensibilities.

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**For a crime story with the heart of** **This American Life:** S-Town
One day, *This American Life producer* Brian Reed receives a rambling email from a man in rural Alabama, claiming his town's corrupt police covered up a brutal murder. Like any good podcast sleuth, Reed follows up, and gets pulled into John D. McLemore's dark, charming, mind, which spewed complaints and conspiracy theories about a mile a minute. Reed goes to McLemore's so-called "Shittown" to investigate, but the story becomes much bigger and more powerful than he ever could've imagined.

**For Those Who Loved *The Jinx*:** *Crimetown*
Gimlet Media's investigation into the labyrinth of organized crime in Providence, Rhode Island. The series is helmed by the creators of HBO's *The Jinx*, so expect the same level of depth and spookiness as the hit show about Robert Durst.
Photo: Courtesy of Gimlet Media.

For The Detail-Obsessed: *Casefile*
This popular true crime podcast relies on the idea that facts, presented as evenly as possible, are really fucking scary. There's no melodrama or frippery in this case-by-case analysis of crime. Each episode details a different case — an anonymous host recites a monologue about the situation and, if you're a details nerd, you'll be transfixed.
**Start with:** "Case 13, the Family Court Murders"

**For The** *Serial* **Addict:** *Up And Vanished*
Delve into Georgia's oldest cold case with an in-depth investigation of the disappearance of Tara Grinstead, a southern beauty queen. Each episode explores a different corner of this erstwhile mystery. Unlike *Serial*, *Up And Vanished* is current, so you're better off if you catch up quickly. Documentary filmmaker Payne Lindsey makes the podcast as he investigates for a separate documentary and publishes episodes as soon as he is able. Think of this as a scrappy low-budget version of NPR's hit podcast.
**Start with:** "Episode 1: Cold As Alaska"
Photo: Courtesy of Tenderfoot.

**For Those Who Love A Chuckle:** *My Favorite Murder*
The premise is simple: two gals gather to talk about their fave murders. No edits, no dramatizations of the past, and no interviews. Both hosts, Karen Kilgariff and Georgia Hardstark, are LA-based entertainers (Karen is a comedy writer; Georgia hosts a cooking show), so the banter is engaging, playful, and not all that detail-oriented. The hosts frequently do a segment called "correction corner" where they apologize their errors in the previous episode. One iTunes reviewer compares it to "high tea at a morgue." I might compare it to champagne at cemetery, but the image is accurate.
**Start with:** "5 - Five Favorite Murders"
Photo: Courtesy Of

**For Those Who Need An Expert:** *Sword And Scale*
It sells itself as an "immersive experience," which means sound effects, music, and all the atmospheric edits that will spook you in your car seat (or subway seat, depending on your commute.) Each episode details a different type of crime — for example, episode two explores the phenomena of female serial killers. Experts provide more bone-chilling details on the topics.
**Start with:** "Episode 3"
Photo: Courtesy Of

**For The Cinephile:** *Hollywood & Crime*
Hollywood's seedy underbelly is the setting of some of the world's most famous murders — so why not have a podcast devoted entirely to that particular location? *Hollywood & Crime* adheres to the traditional "true crime" format, replete with dramatic reenactments and sound effects. Abandon the present and leap into the hazy days of unsolved crime.
**Start with:** "1|Bathtub Murder"
Photo: Courtesy of Wondery.

**For Horror Fans & Sci-Fi Nerds:** *The Last Podcast On The Left*
*The Last Podcast On The Left* isn't strictly true crime. Instead, the podcast widens its umbrella to include literally anything scary. From women who fall in love with serial killers to Bigfoot, hosts Ben Kissel, Henry Zebrowski, and Marcus Parks lead you through every bone-chilling thing to stalk this earth, imaginary or real.
**Start with:** "Episode 28: Families Are Tough"
Photo: Courtesy Of Cave Comedy Radio.

**For The Person Who Gets Impatient With *Up And Vanished*:** *Accused*
*The Cincinnati Enquirer* produces this *Serial* -esque show about a 1978 murder in Ohio. *Accused* has two serious journalists at the helm, so it takes the shape of a journalistic ride-along. Like *Serial*, though, the podcast wonders if the wrong man is imprisoned for the murder. This sort of investigation adds urgency to the story — if an innocent man is in prison, then there's work be done, and quickly.
**Start with:** "Chapter 1: The crime"
Photo: Courtesy Of

**For The Law Expert:** *In The Dark*
*In The Dark* focuses on the failures of one particular case: the abduction of Jacob Wetterling. Yet again, a journalist takes to a case long forgotten to explore the repercussions. Wetterling's abduction is often cited as the origin of "stranger danger" and anxiety over child sex offenders. The podcast is a deep investigation into America's harmful fears in the guise of a jaunty true crime podcast.
**Start with:** "1: The Crime"
Photo: Courtesy Of APM Reports.

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Samira Wiley & Alexis Bledel Are Not Playing "The Gay Character" On The Handmaid's Tale

April 27, 2017, 10:45 am

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There is a hell of a lot to unpack on The Handmaid's Tale, Hulu's new series about a dystopian future — a patriarchal, puritanical society — in which women are reduced to breeding stock. The first three episodes of the can't-look-away show premiered Wednesday night (spoilers for those ahead), and everybody's talking about its searing resonance in the Trump era and just how feminist it is. Equally important to those themes is the savvy way the show handles LGBTQ representation. While the two gay protagonists, Moira (Samira Wiley) and Ofglen (Alexis Bledel), are treated horrendously within the world of the show — they're considered an abomination to the female sex — the characters themselves are incredibly rich. And no one plays "the gay best friend," as Wiley makes clear in a new interview with The Hollywood Reporter.

"The show looks at all of the characters as 100 percent multidimensional characters. We don’t have anyone on our show that is the 'gay character,'" Wiley told THR. "Ofglen is so much more than that. Moira is so much more than that." Wiley explained that her character Moira's sexual orientation is just a piece of her identity. "That is just one part about who she is but I don’t think it’s a character trait," she asserted. "It’s just a fact of who she is, just like the fact that she’s Black. And the fact that she’s a woman."

The Orange Is The New Black actress continued, "When I think about Moira and the kind of person she is, her sexual identity is not something that comes up immediately. I think about her being a strong woman, being this badass character that stands up for herself and for all the women who cannot stand up for themselves. She is someone who will survive."

And if you've started watching The Handmaid's Tale, you'll know that the ability to survive is the most important thing in Moira's world.

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The Zombie Movies You Need To See If You Love The Walking Dead

April 27, 2017, 10:45 am

≫ Next: These Inspiring Movies Will Lift You Up

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Zombies are so hot right now.

Between The Walking Dead, Fear the Walking Dead, and Netflix's upcoming Santa Clarita Diet, which stars Drew Barrymore as a lovable California mom who happens to feast on human flesh, there are more than enough undead to satisfy your apocalyptic TV cravings.

But before zombies were breathing life back into TV, they were devouring their way through the silver screen. The first zombie movie goes back to 1932, when Edward and Victor Halperin directed The White Zombie, about an evil voodoo master who turns a woman into a zombie. Its sequel, Revenge of the Zombies, premiered in 1936.

Since then, the genre has flourished, providing us with such cult classics as Night of the Walking Dead, 28 Days Later, and Shaun of the Dead.

Join us as we look back at some of the scariest, most iconic zombie films of all time. If you're a Rick Grimes fan, you'll probably love these too.

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What We Become (2016)

While a family argues in their summer vacation home, a virus breaks out in their small Danish town. Unbeknownst to them, their town has become overrun by zombies. While What We Become follows many zombie movie tropes, the film is somehow more terrified since the action is couched with such sympathetic characters who were normal just minutes ago.

Shaun of the Dead(2004)
29-year-old Shaun doesn't have much going for him, aside from a dead-end tech job, a "regular" status at the Winchester bar, and a girlfriend who's probably going to dump him. Well, he also has Ed — his best friend and roommate. Busy lounging on the couch, he and Ed miss all the signs for the zombie apocalypse that's swept over the entirety of the UK, so they're stuck fighting zombies from the Winchester bar. This hilarious movie practically gave birth to the horror-comedy genre. It's an utter delight.

Night of the Living Dead (1968)
This cult classic by George Romero is a must-see for any zombie movie fan. The film, which focuses on seven people trapped in a farmhouse in rural Pennsylvania during a zombie apocalypse, inspired our modern conception of the undead. Let's just say that The Walking Dead didn't come up with the whole flesh-eating cannibal thing.

28 Days Later(2002)
Danny Boyle's seminal postapocalyptic film basically brought the zombie genre back to life. (See what I did there?) When animal liberation activists accidentally release a dangerous virus in to the population, all of the U.K.'s social structures break down. A small band of survivors are forced to make tough choices as they navigate this brave new world, where the infected can turn on you at any moment.

Come to think of it, this sounds strangely like the plot of The Walking Dead, too. I mean, the main character, Jim, even wakes up in a hospital weeks after the beginning of the outbreak. Hmm...

Zombieland (2009)
Who says zombies can't be funny? This zombie comedy follows a geeky Jesse Eisenberg as he travels through the Southwest in search of his parents. On the way, he teams up with a zombie Lone Ranger Woody Harrelson, and con artist sister act played by Emma Stone and Abigail Breslin. What could possibly go wrong?

The Horde (2009)
France's answer to the zombie genre is on a whole other level — because, duh. The film starts off like a cops-and-robbers drama as Parisian policemen chase a group of drug dealers who killed one of their own. But things take an even darker twist when a zombie apocalypse breaks out in the city, forcing the two sides to forge and alliance to survive.

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These Inspiring Movies Will Lift You Up

April 27, 2017, 10:45 am

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We all look for inspiration in different ways. Some people turn to religion; some turn to the self-help section at the local Barnes & Noble. Some crank up their go-to motivational tunes (read: anything by Destiny's Child), while others pore over The Secret and try to bibbidy-bobbedy-boo their way into realization of their goals.

And us? Well, a good ol' movie night always helps. Whether it's a biopic celebrating someone who turned the world upside-down for the better, a sports film with "Eye of the Tiger" on repeat, or a tale of overcoming adversity, certain movies simply have a knack for lifting us up and inspiring us to do more and be more.

Who hasn't aspired to the wisdom of Atticus Finch, or the tenacity of Rocky Balboa? What movie-goer hasn't felt a spring in their step after watching the women of Hidden Figures rightfully get their due? Hell, even the Jamaican bobsled team can make a compelling case for the importance of chasing your dreams, no matter how far-fetched they may seem.

Looking to shake yourself out of complacency and get a little fired up? These films should do the trick.

***The Intouchables***(2011)
This unlikely friendship between a wealthy paraplegic and his new caretaker from the rough suburbs of Paris will make you believe in life, love, friendship, and everything good in the world. The best part? It's based on a true story.

***The Theory of Everything*** (2014)
Eddie Redmayne won an Oscar for his moving portrayal of theoretical physicist Stephen Hawking. The biopic captures Hawking's fight to have his brilliant discoveries communicated to the world, pushing back against the physical limitations of his motor neurone disease.
*Pictured: Redmayne as Stephen Hawking*
Photo: Liam Daniel/Working Title/Universal/REX/Shutterstock.

***Selma*** (2014)
Who's more inspiring than Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.? Ava DuVernay's Oscar-winning drama about King's fight for civil rights and the events leading up to his march on Washington is moving *and* motivational. A true testament to the ability of one person to make a difference.
*Pictured: David Oyelowo as Dr. King*
Photo: Atsushi Nishijima/Paramount/Pathe/Harpo Films/REX/Shutterstock.

***Moana***(2016)
At last, a Disney princess who doesn't need some floppy-haired prince to save her hide. Despite the efforts of The Rock's mighty demigod Maui, it's clear that Moana is the one with all the strength and determination. Get it, girl.
*Pictured: Moana*
Photo: Disney/REX/Shutterstock.

***The Shawshank Redemption*** (1994)
Every word out of Morgan Freeman's mouth will have you nodding your head in agreement. This drama starring Freeman (Red) and Tim Robbins (Andy) is about so much more than just prison life; it's about holding on to hope, letting yourself live, and tap-tap-tapping away at those goals.
*Pictured: Tim Robbins and Morgan Freeman*
Photo: ITV/REX/Shutterstock.

***Strictly Ballroom*** (1992)
Though it's one of director Baz Luhrmann's lesser-known films, this Australian rom-com is a must-watch for anyone who likes to cheer on underdogs, so-called ugly ducklings, and splendid, sequined dance numbers.
*Pictured: Tara Morice and Paul Mercurio*
Photo: Moviestore Collection/REX/Shutterstock.

***Milk*** (2008)
Like MLK, Harvey Milk was a hugely important champion of civil rights who met a tragic end. Sadly, few outside the LGBT community knew about his work and legacy as the first openly gay man to hold political office in the U.S. until this biopic was released.
*Pictured: Sean Penn as Milk*
Photo: Focus Features/REX/Shutterstock.

**Hidden Figures** (2016)
Let's hear it for the unsung heroes of the Space Race: the Black female geniuses who helped send John Glenn to space.
*Pictured: Janelle Monae, Taraji P. Henson, and Octavia Spencer*
Photo: 20th Century Fox/REX/Shutterstock.

***Remember the Titans*** (2000)
Come for the early Ryan Gosling film credit, stay for the powerful story of a newly desegregated football team beating the odds, one racist official at a time.
*Pictured: Will Patton and Denzel Washington*
Photo: Moviestore Collection/REX/Shutterstock.

***A League of Their Own*** (1992)
This story about the real-life All-American Girls Professional Baseball League *still* makes us want to trade it all in for a baseball bat.
*Pictured: Rosie O'Donnell and Madonna*
Photo: Moviestore Collection/REX/Shutterstock.

***Slumdog Millionaire*** (2009)
With all due respect to Drake, Jamal's (Dev Patel) started-from-the-bottom-now-we're-here story has his beat. Dude won a pile of money, got the girl, and broke it down to "Jai Ho"... what could possibly be better?
*Pictured: Dev Patel as Jamal*
Photo: Moviestore/REX/Shutterstock.

***To Kill a Mockingbird*** (1992)
This film has so many bittersweet and tragic moments, but somehow Atticus Finch's (Gregory Peck) moral compass guides us through. Let's just forget all about *Go Set a Watchman*, shall we?
*Pictured: Mary Badham and Gregory Peck*
Photo: Universal/REX/Shutterstock.

***Creed*** (2015)
Consider this a blanket endorsement for the inspirational attributes of all 3 billion Rocky films.
*Pictured: Sylvester Stallone and Michael B. Jordan*
Photo: Barry Wetcher/Warner Bros./MGM/REX/Shutterstock.

***Working Girl*** (1988)
Never mind your body. If you've got a mind for business, this tale of an unappreciated underling who outbosses her boss is pure inspo-board material. Here's to one day getting your own office and having your best friend shout it from the rooftops.
*Pictured: Melanie Griffith*
Photo: 20th Century Fox/REX/Shutterstock.

***Eddie the Eagle*** (2016)
This feel-good sports film about Britain's first Olympic ski-jumper is an excellent reminder that it's not whether you win or lose, it's whether you even dare to dream.
*Pictured: Taron Egerton*
Photo: Larry D Horricks/20th Century Fox/Marv Films/Saville Productions/REX/Shutterstock.

***Bend It Like Beckham*** (2002)
Responsible for countless young girls signing up for soccer (okay, fine, football) teams.
*Pictured: Parminder Nagra*
Photo: Bend It Films/Film Council/REX/Shutterstock.

***Sing*** (2016)
Yes, that *was* you totally tearing up at an animated elephant overcoming her crippling stage fright.
*Pictured: Meena, voiced by Tori Kelly*
Photo: Universal Studios/REX/Shutterstock.

***Hector and The Search for Happiness*** (2014)
This under-the-radar film stars Simon Pegg as a bored British psychiatrist who travels the world in search of meaning. Think of it as the male version of *Eat Pray Love*.
*Pictured: Simon Pegg as Hector*
Photo: Egoli Tossell Film/Film Afrika World Wide/Construction Film/Wild Bunch/REX/Shutterstock.

***Eat Pray Love*** (2010)
Speak of the devil. For all its criticisms, this film based on Elizabeth Gilbert's bestseller is a handy argument for leaving the drama behind and indulging in some self-discovery. Now, who's going to bankroll all this navel-gazing?
*Pictured: Julia Roberts*
Pictured: Columbia Pictures/REX/Shutterstock.

***Cool Runnings*** (1993)
If Jamaica can have an Olympic bobsled team, you can at least take a stab at whatever your goal may be.
*Pictured: Malik Yoba, Leon Robinson, Doug E. Doug, and Rawle D. Lewis*
Photo: Paramount/REX/Shutterstock.

**Joy** (2015)
Anyone with big dreams and a thankless job can take comfort in the story of self-made businesswoman Joy Mangano, a struggling single mother who became a hugely successful entrepreneur.
*Pictured: Jennifer Lawrence as Mangano*
Photo: Fox 2000/REX/Shutterstock.

***La La Land*** (2016)
Love story aside, this musical rom-com is really about pursuing your dreams.
*Pictured: Ryan Gosling and Emma Stone*
Photo: Dale Robinette/Black Label Media/REX/Shutterstock.

***Norma Rae*** (1979)
Sally Field's factory worker taught us the art of fighting the man and standing up for your rights.
*Pictured: Sally Field*
Photo: 20th Century Fox/Rex/Shutterstock.

***The Pursuit of Happyness***(2006)
Nothing like a real-life rags-to-riches story to motivate you (and make you cry like a baby).
*Pictured: Will and Jaden Smith*
Photo: Zade Rosenthal/Columbia/REX/Shutterstock.

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32 Memoirs You Have To Read

April 27, 2017, 10:50 am

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Some call it navel-gazing. We call it too good to put down.

As much as we adore fiction, a good memoir really has a huge emotional impact on the reader, because it has the benefit of being true (unless it's by James Frey, in which case, never mind). Whether it's Maya Angelou or Tina Fey or Barack Obama, everyone has a story to tell, and it's just a pleasure to be invited in.

The memoirists featured range from acclaimed poets to former slaves to humorists to rock stars. Their stories are engrossing, heartbreaking, unbelievable at times, and often hilarious. They're honest and raw, inviting you to chew on their own highly personal experiences as you meditate on your own. They're just filled with life.

Ahead we’ve gathered our favorite memoirs and autobiographies. Book reports are due next week, okay?

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*Yes, Chef*, Marcus Samuelsson(2015)
Every week, a young boy learns to cook in his grandmother's kitchen. The grandmother is Swedish; the boy is adopted from Ethiopia, and will go on to become a renowned chef. In this love story to food and family, Samuelsson tracks his path from grandma's kitchen to his acclaimed restaurant, Red Rooster, in Harlem.

*Operating Instructions: A Journal of My Son's First Year,* Anne Lamott (1993)
Themes: pregnancy, motherhood, religion, writing
When the writer Anne Lamott becomes pregnant by a man who wants *nothing* to do with her child, she surprises herself by keeping the baby. In her singularly honest, humble, and hilarious prose, Lamott chronicles how she, a single woman in her 30s sleeping on a futon, fared with an infant baby boy. Lamott puts the emphasis on her own growth, as well as Sam's. As if having a child weren't enough of a life change, Lamott finds out that her best friend in the whole world faces an overwhelming medical diagnosis. The book will make you gape at the changes a year can hold.

*Minor Characters: A Beat Memoir,* Joyce Johnson (1999)
Themes: The 1960s, New York City, Beat Writers
Joyce Johnson may be best known as Jack Kerouac’s longtime girlfriend, but she rises above this reputation in this wholly realized, poignant memoir about growing up in a bygone New York. Johnson recounts her journey towards independence in an era that made it downright difficult to be an independent woman. Fans of Beat writers Alan Ginsberg and Jack Kerouac will love seeing the literary figures in such a raw light — but everyone interested in tracking a woman's journey into self-actualization would enjoy this remarkably well-written book.
Courtesy of Penguin Random House

*Bossypants*, Tina Fey (2011)
Themes: Comedy, work, womanhood
Fey charts her rise from geeky student to *Saturday Night Live* standout and the queen of *30 Rock*. Like all the best books, it's both hilarious and wise.
Photo: Courtesy of Little, Brown Book Group.

*Twelve Years a Slave*, Solomon Northup (1853)
Themes: Slavery, race
The basis of the Oscar-winning film from 2013, this memoir follows the life of Solomon Northup, a free Black man from New York who was kidnapped and forced into slavery in the South. It’s horrifying and hugely important.
Photo: Courtesy of Atria.

*Down and Out in Paris and London*, George Orwell (1933)
Themes: Poverty
Though not strictly a standard memoir — Orwell wrote about his own experiences in a fictionalized nature — this account of living on the streets and in shelters in European capitals is both entertaining in tone and humbling in subject matter. Your landlord may be hassling you about your overdue rent, but it's unlikely you've ever experienced poverty like this.
Photo: Courtesy of Mariner.

*Black Boy*, Richard Wright (1945)
Themes: Race, religion, poverty, communism
Wright's autobiography of growing up in the Jim Crow South is a classic for good reason. Expect tales of extreme poverty and racism, as well as Wright's eventual interest in the arts and Communism.
Photo: Courtesy of HarperCollins.

*Anne Frank: The Diary of a Young Girl*, Anne Frank (1947)
Themes: Adolescence, the Holocaust, faith
If you haven't already read this in school, write your old teachers a stern letter. A heartbreaking classic.
Photo: Courtesy of Bantam.

*Speak, Memory*, Vladimir Nabokov (1951)
Themes: Russian revolution, family, politics, literature, travel
The man who gave us *Lolita* had *quite* the childhood.
Photo: Courtesy of Everyman's Library.

*I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings*, Maya Angelou (1969)
Themes: Race, adolescence, rape
This celebrated autobiography has some sections that are very hard to read, given the subject matter (racism, sexual violence), but it's a literary touchstone for a reason. Full respect to the late, great poet.
Photo: Courtesy of Random House.

*The Woman Warrior: Memoirs of a Girlhood Among Ghosts*, Maxine Hong Kingston (1976)
Themes: Feminism, Chinese culture, womanhood
A frequent entry on many a feminist's syllabus, this genre-spanning work incorporates Chinese folktales into its examination of modern women's identity.
Photo: Courtesy of Vintage.

*This Boy's Life: A Memoir,* Tobias Wolff (1989)
Themes: Adolescence, family, abuse
Such a good read, even if you've already seen the Leo film. Toby/Jack's stepdad is the ultimate villain to root against.
Photo: Courtesy of Grove Press.

*Fever Pitch*, Nick Hornby (1992)
Themes: Sports, adolescence
Technically, this inspired the very meh Jimmy Fallon-Drew Barrymore rom-com of the same name, but the book has so much more going for it. The true love story here is Hornby's devotion to the Arsenal football (er, soccer) club, written about so enthusiastically that it's hard to not walk away a fan yourself.
Photo: Courtesy of Penguin.

*All Over but the Shoutin'*, Rick Bragg (1991)
Themes: Poverty, family, the Deep South
Consider this a rich, engrossing tale of survival in the Deep South.
Photo: Courtesy of Vintage.

**Autobiography of a Face, Lucy Grealy (1994)**
Themes: Health, self-image, beauty, depression
Grealy, who endured numerous operations on her face after the removal of her Ewing's sarcoma left her disfigured, died of a drug overdose eight years after this book's publication.
Photo: Courtesy of HarperCollins.

*The Liars' Club*, Mary Karr (1995)
Themes: Family, adolescence, Southern culture
As eccentric as Mary Karr makes her parents out to be, you'll no doubt wish you knew them personally after reading this incredibly honest and wry account of growing up in small-town Texas. Karr's lively language and Southern-fried quotes are a joy.
Photo: Courtesy of Penguin.

*Dreams from My Father: A Story of Race and Inheritance*, Barack Obama (1995)
Themes: Race, identity, politics, idealism
Long before he became POTUS, Barack Obama published this thoughtful memoir about growing up in Hawaii and Indonesia as the child of a white single mother and a Kenyan father he barely knew. It's a moving, fascinating story, whatever your politics.
Photo: Courtesy of Three Rivers Press.

*Angela's Ashes*, Frank McCourt (1996)
Themes: Poverty, family, loss, Catholicism
Cheery it's not, but it certainly deserved the Pulitzer Prize. Brace yourself for serious heartache, and, yes, some levity, too.
Photo: Courtesy of Scribner.

*A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius*, Dave Eggers (2000)
Themes: Death, family, survival
Eggers becomes guardian to his young brother when their parents die. A long story short: You'll laugh, you'll cry.
Photo: Courtesy of Vintage.

*Kitchen Confidential: Adventures in the Culinary Underbelly*, Anthony Bourdain (2000)
Themes: Cooking, addiction, travel
The former chef/current TV personality gets gritty about his life in food.
Photo: Courtesy of Ecco.

*Me Talk Pretty One Day*, David Sedaris (2000)
Themes: Humor, family, gay identity
Picking your favorite David Sedaris book is like picking your favorite child. They're all too good. Will the Sedaris family go ahead and adopt us, please?
Photo: Courtesy of Back Bay Books.

*Don't Let's Go to the Dogs Tonight: An African Childhood,* Alexandra Fuller (2001)
Themes: Loss, Africa, war, family
The straight-shooting Alexandra Fuller details her eccentric family's life and losses during Rhodesia's fight for independence. It will grab you even in the darkest moments.
Photo: Courtesy of Random House.

*The Glass Castle*, Jeannette Walls (2005)
Themes: Poverty, adolescence, family, survival
The former gossip columnist had a doozy of a childhood, fending for herself as her parents turned to alcohol and their own interests.
Photo: Courtesy of Scribner.

*When a Crocodile Eats the Sun*, Peter Godwin (2006)
Themes: Death, war, fathers and sons, Robert Mugabe
This follow-up to *Mukiwa*, Godwin's story of growing up as a white Rhodesian, is engrossing on both a personal and political level. Godwin's relationship with his dying father will have you choking back tears, while his accounts of president Robert Mugabe's abuse of power will leave you fuming.
Photo: Courtesy of Back Bay Books.

*The Tender Bar: A Memoir*, J.R. Moehringer (2006)
Themes: Family, adolescence
Hilarious, endearing, and poignant, this memoir will make you wish you spent your childhood hanging out with your wisecracking uncle at the local bar.
Photo: Courtesy of Hyperion.

*My Life in France*, Julia Child (2007)
Themes: French cuisine, travel, *joie de vivre*
Let's hear it for late bloomers. Julia Child's lively tales of experiencing fine French dining for the first time, failing her final cooking exam, and living in Paris with husband Paul will have you booking the next Air France flight.
Photo: Courtesy of Anchor.

*A Long Way Gone: Memoirs of a Boy Soldier*, Ishmael Beah (2007)
Themes: Africa, war, violence, survival
Beah became a boy soldier in Sierra Leone and came out the other side. His story offers insight into the violence of the region, which leaves young boys with few choices and little hope for survival.
Photo: Courtesy of Sarah Crichton Books.

*Lit: A Memoir*, Mary Karr (2009)
Themes: Alcoholism, relationships, parenting, family
Yes, yes, it's another Mary Karr selection. This searingly honest memoir details Karr's battle with alcoholism and a failing marriage, warts and all.
Photo: Courtesy of Harper Perennial.

*Just Kids,* Patti Smith (2010)
Themes: Art, creativity, rock music
The poet and rocker chronicles her life in New York City in the late '60s and '70s, during which time she lived in the Hotel Chelsea, dated artist Robert Mapplethorpe, and connected with stars like Jimi Hendrix and Janis Joplin.
Photo: Courtesy of Ecco.

*Blood, Bones & Butter: The Inadvertent Education of a Reluctant Chef*, Gabrielle Hamilton (2011)
Julia Child she ain't. Chef Gabrielle Hamilton reveals all as she chronicles the several odd jobs and relationship woes endured along her way to culinary stardom.
Photo: Courtesy of Random House.

*Wild*, Cheryl Strayed (2012)
Themes: Loss, relationships, personal strength, nature
In case you missed out on the Reese Witherspoon film, here's a primer. Reeling from the death of her mother and the breakup of her marriage, Strayed sets out to walk the Pacific Crest Trail. Gorgeous, riveting, and open-hearted.
Photo: Courtesy of Knopf Doubleday.

*Brain on Fire: My Month of Madness*, Susannah Cahalan (2012)
Themes: Health
Cahalan was a young reporter living in New York City when she was struck by a mysterious, debilitating illness with seemingly no cure. Her fight to regain control of her mind and body is inspiring, and an important reminder to never take your own health for granted.
Photo: Courtesy of Simon & Schuster.

*I Am Malala: The Girl Who Stood Up for Education and Was Shot by the Taliban*, Malala Yousafzai (2013)
Themes: Education, Taliban, women's rights, survival
Be honest: This has been on your to-read list for quite some time now. We assure you that the story of resistance and perseverance is too good to let slip by.
Photo: Courtesy of Little, Brown and Company.

*My Life on the Road*, Gloria Steinem (2015)
Themes: Feminism, politics, advocacy, travel
The feminist icon delves deep into her upbringing and chronicles her early days of fighting for women's rights both here and abroad.
Photo: Courtesy of Random House.

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↧

Our Favorite Crime Shows Of All Time

April 27, 2017, 10:55 am

≫ Next: An Extensive Photo History Of The Trumps At The Met Gala

≪ Previous: 32 Memoirs You Have To Read

A great crime show has a twisted and charming reliability: Who doesn't love the intrigue of a heinous fictional crime, with the promise that it will be neatly resolved within an hour?

The best crime shows add a little more nuance. The Wire isn't a series about choosing sides — jaded lawmen vs. strategic gangsters — but about seeing how everyone's soul is compromised in the rat race toward a phony American dream. HBO's more recent The Night Of follows a similar pattern to its predecessors: There isn't just one experience when it comes to cops and crime — perspectives vary drastically based on where you are and what you look like.

The real criminal justice system seems closer to a horror-thriller these days, so the shows ahead might even be a little inspiring, too. In these series, dutiful, hardworking people try to make an inherently biased system work for everyone. The charm of all 450-plus episodes of Law & Order comes from its dependable formula. These are good cops working toward a fair conviction. That's not always true in real life.

***Midsomer Murders***(1997-present)
You saw that right: this mystery show has been running for *twenty years*. While the English countryside is quaint and picturesque, the crime-fighting Barnaby family knows about its seedy, murder-prone underbelly. Each episode of this sinister crime show focuses on a different incident, so you can fit it flexibly in your schedule.

***American Crime***(2015-present)
Each season of this acclaimed anthology series peers into a different trial, providing a fascinating, multi-faceted perspective on *all* the lives impacted in a crime. The most recent season focuses on a group of migrant workers in Alamance County, North Carolina, who are pulled into a world of forced labor, sex trafficking, and drug addiction.

***Twin Peaks (1990-1991)***
Starring: Kyle MacLachlan
The question haunting this eerie show is, "Who killed Laura Palmer?" FBI Agent Dale Cooper arrives to the quiet, rainy town of Twin Peaks, Washington to find out just that. Definitely the most aesthetically conscious crime show of all time, *Twin Peaks* was the first, and perhaps the only, of its kind.
Lynch-Frost/Ciby 2000/REX/Shutterstock

***Breaking Bad***(2008-2013)
Starring: Bryan Cranston, Aaron Paul, Anna Gunn
This is a crime show, only it's on the side of the criminal. Watch as Walter White evolves from timid chemistry teacher with terminal cancer to a kingpin of the meth trade.
Since *Breaking Bad* is widely known as the greatest TV show of all time, you don't need us to tell you to watch it. You already *know* you should watch it.

**Dexter**(2002 - 2012)
**Starring:** Michael C Hall, Jennifer Carpenter
When this show about a do-gooder serial killer premiered on Showtime, it toppled conventions on what — and who — a protagonist should be. Dexter’s adopted father Harry recognized his son would be unable to rise above his insatiable thirst for, well, murder. Harry, a police officer, knew just how a criminal could get around the cops. As a gift from father to son, Harry teaches Dexter how to kill without getting caught, and how to choose victims who are already guilty of other crimes.
The twist? In addition to being a murderer himself, Dexter is an indispensable Forensics Expert of the Miami police department. Throughout its eight seasons, Dexter redefined what a crime show was, and who a criminal is.
Photo: Courtesy of Showtime

**Quantico** (2016 - )
The show that sent Priyanka Chopra to America saw major success after the first season, which aired just last year. Chopra plays Alex Parrish, an FBI agent who becomes the prime suspect in a terrorist attack on Grand Central. After successfully clearing her name, Alex begins the second season of the series, which is currently airing on ABC, as a newly hired CIA operative.
Photo: Courtesy of ABC.

**Sherlock** (2010 - )
**Starring:** Benedict Cumberbatch, Martin Freeman
Benedict Cumberbatch is the emotionless detective Sherlock Holmes in this BBC adaptation of the character. What makes this iteration rise above all others — *Luther* excluded — is Cumberbatch's robotic performance as our socially inept hero. His chemistry with straight man Watson, played by Martin Freeman, keeps us interested. At face value, *Sherlock* is a campy procedural, but beneath the tongues in cheeks, the show is an elegant depiction of reluctant male friendship.
Photo: Rex/Shutterstock.

**Search Party** (2016 - Present)
**Starring:** Alia Shawkat, John Early, John Reynolds, Meredith Hagner
Though it be but young, *Search Party* is powerful. The genre-bending show combines quirky New York comedy with crime procedural, and it wins at both. Four young Brooklyn folk (think characters from HBO's *Girls*) become entangled in a crime when a friend from college disappears without a trace. Suddenly, they have to grapple with real life and — gasp! — something other than themselves. *Search Party* will please your crime show cravings without tasting stale.
Photo: Courtesy of CBS.

**Bones** (2005 - )
**Starring:** David Boreanaz, Emily Deschanel, T.J. Thyne, Michaela Conlin, Tamara Taylor
Say what you will about Fox's will-they-or-won't-they procedural — *Bones* is just plain addictive. The series follows a forensic anthropologist, Dr. "Bones" Brennan (Emily Deschanel), and FBI agent Booth (David Boreanaz) as they solve crimes and try not to fall in love. The banter between the two recalls our faves Scully and Mulder of the *X-Files.* After 12 seasons, one wonders if the show is living on borrowed time, but the fact remains that the show is prime crime television. There's rotting corpses, scientific jargon, and sexual tension. What more can you ask from a crime show?
Photo: 20th Century Fox Television/REX/Shutterstock

**Boardwalk Empire** (2010 - 2014)
**Starring:** Steve Buscemi, Michael K. Williams, Kelly Macdonald, Michael Shannon, Vincent Piazza, Jack Huston, Michael Pitt
"You can't be half a gangster," this Martin Scorsese-produced HBO show proclaimed in its third season. That's the biggest and best theme of the show, which follows Atlantic City bootlegger Enoch "Nucky" Thompson. He tries being half a gangster and half a politician, but it never works out.
The show frequently sputters, and is sometimes slow. But visually it's still pretty astonishing. If you're not in it for the long haul, stream the second season, when Michael Pitt puts in good work.

**Broadchurch** (2013 - Present)
**Starring:** David Tennant, Olivia Colman, Jodie Whittaker
This British import stars David Tennant of *Jessica Jones* and *Dr. Who* fame and Olivia Colman as detectives in the small town of Dorset, UK. The first season (or series, if you will excuse the British-ism), begins when the body of an 11-year-old boy appears on a nearby beach. The following episodes detail the fallout from the death, which, incidentally, looks an awful lot like murder. *Broadchurch* has the ingredients of a been-there-done-that procedural, but the setting, in combination with superb performances from the two leads, makes for a haunting drama that lasts far beyond your average crime show.
A warning for beginners: the accents in this show are pretty thick, so you may want to watch with subtitles.

**Narcos** (2015 - Present)
**Starring:** Wagner Moura, Pedro Pascal, Boyd Holbrook, Paulina Gaitán
This gritty and addictive Netflix drama isn't for the faint of heart. The show follows Colombian kingpin Pablo Escobar, who's feeling the pinch of the Drug Enforcement Agency.
Even though we know how this ends — the "King of Cocaine" was eventually shot and killed by the Columbian National Police in 1993 — the series is exciting and bloody.

**Luther** (2010-2016)
**Starring:** Idris Elba, Ruth Wilson
DCI John Luther is a brilliant but tormented British police detective. His dedication to catching killers borders on an obsession that tends to consume him. For much of the series he chases the beautiful but cunning serial killer Alice Morgan (Ruth Wilson).
The searing crime drama has been called Elba's best work since *The Wire*. He won a Golden Globe for the show in 2012.

**The Fall** (2013-2016)
**Starring:** Gillian Anderson, Jamie Dornan
Jamie Dornan is, objectively, an attractive man. The *Fifty Shades of Grey* franchise does not make good on his appeal. *The Fall*, however, does.
But Gillian Anderson is The Fall's true star. As high ranking detective Stella Gibson, Anderson is hot on the trail of a serial killer targeting white, brunette women. That serial killer is — shocker — Dornan's character. These two face off in this slow burning BBC series.
Photo: Courtesy of BBC.

**The Killing** (2011-2014)
**Starring:** Mireille Enos, Joel Kinnaman
Detectives Sarah Linden (Enos) and Stephen Holder (Kinnaman) star in this moody, intense drama about Seattle crime. The duo occasionally butt heads — she's stern, he's unfettered — but they have to work together to solve four seasons worth of grisly murders.
*The Killing* 's greatness was spectacular, but ultimately uneven: "Every year, fans rolled that rock up the hill of fine acting, great dialogue and stunning visuals," wrote Joel Keller for Indiewire, "only to be crushed as it rolled back down, thanks to the end of the season making no sense, or executed so poorly that you found yourself yelling at the screen."
Photo: Courtesy of AMC.

**True Detective** (2014-Present)
**Starring:** Matthew McConaughey, Woody Harrelson, Michelle Monaghan
Ok, we know the second season of this HBO show was flaming hot garbage fire. But the first season of *True Detective* — for all of the "time is a flat circle" goofiness — was pretty compelling.
*True Detective* 's central crime unfolded beautifully, with bold camera work and precise commentary on religion, politics, and the American south. A pair of grizzled Louisiana detectives tried to track down the man who murdered a prostitute in two timelines. The past and present converged to make for a really great whodunit.
That first season also did right by its women: At Grantland, Molly Lambert made a good case this. "But I don’t think the women on *True Detective* are mere virgins and whores. Far from it. I think that it’s through them we are made to see the very obvious problems with Marty’s view of women as virgins and whores," she wrote. "The show is also equally weighted toward Rust’s POV, which questions much of that worldview."
Photo: Courtesy of HBO.

**Cold Case** (2003-2010)
**Starring:** Kathryn Morris, Danny Pino, John Finn
Vintage unsolved mysteries got a second look in this CBS series. Detective Lilly Rush was an expert at closing cases whose files were weathered with decades of age and buried evidence.
The *Cold Case* crew took on old missing persons cases and unsolved murders. They always seemed like the underdog against aging witnesses, and the limitations of technology when the cases were first opened. That, plus Detective Rush's struggle as her squad's only woman investigator, made this a compelling crime drama.
Photo: Courtesy of CBS.

**Law & Order: SVU**(1999-Present)
**Starring:** Mariska Hargitay, Christopher Meloni, Ice-T, Richard Belzer, B.D. Wong
*SVU* is the best of the franchise, and the one readily available on Netflix. Olivia Benson and Elliott Stabler were the most reliable partners, a perfect balance of friendship, cynicism, truth, and toughness. All the conventions of the original series were carried over into this spin-off, which dealt primarily with sex crimes. To the credit of the producers, the show confronted sex shaming and victim-blaming for women other shows considered high risk targets.
To date, *SVU* is known for timely takes on the news. Recent episodes have taken on GamerGate, Robert Durst, and sexual assault on college campuses.
Photo: Courtesy of NBC.

**Law & Order**(1990-2010)
**Starring**: Sam Waterston, S. Epatha Merkerson, Jerry Orbach, Anthony Anderson
The OG *Law & Order* exemplifies the franchise's signature mix of compelling, timely cases and interesting cops and attorneys. Over 20 years and 450 episodes, the show became a benchmark for great serialized crime dramas.
In its final seasons, *Law & Order* was up against cable heavyweights like *Lost* and 24. It's better than both, wrote Mike Hale for *The* *New York Times* at the time of the show's cancellation, and will likely age better, too: "Through 20 seasons, the message of *Law & Order* was always about living to fight another day."
Photo: Courtesy of NBC.

**The Wire** (2002-2008)
**Starring**: Wendell Pierce, Michael Kenneth Williams, Sonja Sohn
No show deals with the intersection of crime, the judicial system, race, power, and the cynicism that pervades each as well as *The Wire*. The show launched a host of impressively textured careers — including those of Idris Elba, Michael B. Jordan, Michael K. Williams, and Dominic West — and established creator and showrunner David Simon as one of the smartest and most influential figures in TV. *The Wire* shines because of its moral ambiguity: In a city beset by inequality, the lines between the good and bad guys aren't easy to draw.
Photo: Courtesy of HBO.

**Southland** (2009-2013)
**Starring**: Regina King, Ben McKenzie, Michael Cudlitz
*Southland* 's vision of the LAPD is dark and conflicted. The character-driven drama sees LA crime on a granular level, through the eyes of the detectives who patrol the streets daily. The show's run was short, but it presented a grittier take on police life on a major network. Also, who wouldn't support a show that kept *The O.C*.'s Ben McKenzie employed?
Photo: Courtesy of TNT.

**How to Get Away With Murder** (2014-Present)
**Starring**: Viola Davis, Liza Weil, Alfred Enoch, Matt McGorry
Shonda Rhimes' reign continues with *HTGAWM*, anchored by Viola Davis. The show's characters are always escaping their own murder charges or defending clients against a conviction, but its standout strength is the compelling character of Annalise Keating (Davis). "I wanted to play a fully realized, dark-skinned woman, and just doing that alone could be revolutionary," Davis told *The* *New York Times*. The show's realistic, assertive look at sexuality and power has earned it high praise.
Photo: Courtesy of ABC.

**The Closer** (2005-2012)
**Starring**: Kyra Sedgwick, J.K. Simmons
Kyra Sedgwick plays Brenda Johnson, an Atlanta police detective with a particular talent: getting confessions. Johnson is kind of an oddball character to her peers — her bright, confident outfits stick out in a sea of police blue and gray — but she is a titan interrogator. "Women are not successful because they act like men...femininity is a power," executive producer James Duff told *The* *Christian Science Monitor* at the time of the show's end. "It is not a weakness or something that needs to be compensated for. So I was very concentrated on making sure that Brenda remained a woman in this world."
Photo: Courtesy of TNT.

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An Extensive Photo History Of The Trumps At The Met Gala

April 27, 2017, 11:00 am

≫ Next: The Funniest Movie Quotes Of All Time

≪ Previous: Our Favorite Crime Shows Of All Time

Well, it's that time of year again. The first Monday of May is in just a few days, so we've been pretty busy looking back at some highlights from the Met Gala. But there's a question that's been on our minds about the annual spectacle since January: Will the Trump family attend this year? Page Six let us know that Jared Kushner and Ivanka Trump are "too busy" to make it, which (we guess) makes sense, and the President and FLOTUS will not be going either. So, we're looking back at all of their red carpet appearances of Met Gala's past.

You'll notice a couple of things about the family's stunts at fashion's biggest night of the year. First Daughter Ivanka Trump seems to have consistently eschewed each year's theme — save for 2013 and 2014 — and stepmother Melania Trump has essentially done the same. This is particularly disappointing, considering half the fun of the Met Gala is seeing how all of the attendees interpreted it.

Ahead, we present you with a thorough chronology of the Trump family at the Met Gala. Similar to the Trump family at New York Fashion Week, and dating all the way back to 1985, the photos are a must-see, no matter what your politics are. Of course, this year's Rei Kawakubo show will go on — and in fact, it may be better off without them, as we're not sure there's enough room for the Secret Service on the steps of the Metropolitan Museum — but, hey, they sure had a good run, didn't they? Make sure you don't miss Ivanka's headpiece from Superheroes: Fashion and Fantasy in 2008. It's a doozy.

Jared Kushner and Ivanka Trump at last year's Met Gala, themed *Manus x Machina: Fashion In An Age Of Technology*. Trump wore a custom Ralph Lauren jumpsuit and cape that featured no technological aspects at all.
Photo: Larry Busacca/Getty Images.

Trump at *China: Through the Looking Glass*, the Met Gala that brought in over 815,000 visitors, donning custom Prabal Gurung.
Photo: Taylor Hill/FilmMagic.

In 2014, Trump attended the *Charles James: Beyond Fashion-* themed bash wearing Oscar de la Renta, a gown she chose because it embodied de la Renta's motto: "Elegance is a way of life." It sure is, isn't it?
Photo: Rabbani and Solimene Photography/Getty Images.

Ivanka Trump at *Punk: Chaos to Couture* in Juan Carlos Obando in 2013. The designer was a runner-up in the CFDA/Vogue Fashion Fund competition that same year. It's hard to imagine Trump going punk, but hey, at least she tried.
Photo: Kevin Mazur/WireImage.

President Donald Trump and First Lady Melania Trump at *Schiaparelli And Prada: Impossible Conversations*, in 2012. Look at those Louboutins.
Photo: Larry Busacca/Getty Image.

For a high-meets-low take, Trump wore a dress by Peter Pilotto with accessories from her eponymous fashion label.
Photo: Larry Busacca/Getty Images.

Donald and Melania Trump at *Alexander McQueen: Savage Beauty* in 2011. She's wearing Reem Acra, but, hey, at least Melania sported a clutch and accessories by McQueen for the event.
Photo: Larry Busacca/Getty Images.

Kushner, wearing the same tux style he'd go on to wear for the next five years' worth of Met Galas, and Trump in Atelier Versace, in 2010.

Here's Melania Trump, also in 2010, in Christian Siriano; the designer has since committed to not dressing FLOTUS moving forward.
Photo: Larry Busacca/Getty Images.

The pair at the Met Gala in 2009. That year's theme was *The Model As Muse: Embodying Fashion*, which makes Trump's turn on the red carpet (decked out in Dolce & Gabbana) particularly fitting.
Photo: Chance Yeh/Patrick McMullan/Getty Images.

That year, the First Daughter wore Brian Reyes; the designer, who got his start at Oscar de la Renta, had an eponymous line that was really buzzy in the aughts before closing in 2010, and he frequently sat Trump front row at his shows.
Photo: BILLY FARRELL/Patrick McMullan/Getty Images.

Blaine Trump, ex-wife of Robert Trump (Donald's brother), shown here with Lynda Carter. That year's Met Gala theme was *Superheroes: Fashion and Fantasy*. Carter's famous for her role as Wonder Woman.
Photo: Chance Yeh/Patrick McMullan/Getty Images.

Designer Gilles Mendel and Ivanka Trump in one of his J. Mendel creations. If you'd like to purchase a replica of this dress, it's currently on sale for $147.
Photo: Andrew H. Walker/Getty Images.

Trump really adhered to the theme.
Photo: Randy Brooke/WireImage.

Melania's fuchsia number by Vera Wang may not have given off those save-the-world vibes that the superhero theme called for, but it sure was bright. Trump also wore the designer for her wedding that same year.
Photo: Stephen Lovekin/Getty Images.

Trump wore a fringed and beaded Roberto Cavalli number to the Met Gala in 2007, which honored Paul Poiret, a French couturier whose works are likened to Picasso.
Photo: BILLY FARRELL/Patrick McMullan/Getty Images.

And then-businesswoman Ivanka Trump opted for a bit of colorblocking and wore Jason Wu.
Photo: Peter Kramer/Getty Images.

Socialite Ivana Trump at *AngloMania: Tradition and Transgression in British Fashion* in 2006.
Photo: Evan Agostini/Getty Images.

This is one of the very few times we've seen brown on the red carpet, that's for sure.
Photo: Evan Agostini/Getty Images.

Melania and Donald Trump at the Met Gala in 2006. Then-pregnant Melania chose a sweetheart neckline to accentuate her baby bump.
Photo: Evan Agostini/Getty Images.

Trump accessorized her bob with a ruffled collar in an all-black ensemble that seemed fitting for 2005's theme, *The House of* *Chanel.*
Photo: Evan Agostini/Getty Images.

To fête Chanel, Trump wore a satin gown with a tulle bottom by Alexander McQueen.
Photo: Evan Agostini/Getty Images.

The crew at *Dangerous Liaisons: Fashion and Furniture in the 18th Century*, in 2004.
Photo: Evan Agostini/Getty Images.

In 1998, Trump ~~grabs~~ — *ahem* — puts his arm around date Andrea Murray at *Cubism and Fashion*.
Photo: Richard Corkery/NY Daily News Archive/Getty Images.

Ivana Trump is all smiles while celebrating Christian Dior in 1996.
Photo: Evan Agostini/Getty Images.

Met Gala pals Lynda Carter and Blaine Trump celebrating *Diana Vreeland: Immoderate Style* in 1993.
Photo: Ron Galella/WireImage.

In 1989, then-couple Ivana and Donald Trump held hands at *The Age of* *Napoleon: Costume from Revolution to Empire*. What an interesting way to do that whole couple-matching thing.
Photo: Ron Galella/WireImage.

Ivana and Donald Trump at *In Style: Celebrating Fifty Years of the Costume Institute* in 1987. It looks like Trump got a head-start on this year's Pantone Color of The Year, no?
Photo: Sonia Moskowitz/Getty Images.

The couple again, in 1986, at the *Dance* -themed Met Gala. Barney's creative ambassador-at-large Simon Doonan said of the night, "I think I must have knocked back one too many cocktails because all I can remember is go-go dancing in a room full of Cardin and Courrèges '60s disco dresses."
Photo: Sonia Moskowitz/Getty Images.

Lynda Carter and Blaine Trump, on the same night.
Photo: Rose Hartman/Getty Images.

And, in 1985, at *Costumes of Royal India*, Ivana Trump went the festive route with a velvet leopard dress. To be honest, we're kind of into this one.
Photo: Tom Gates/Archive Photos/Getty Images.

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The Funniest Movie Quotes Of All Time

April 27, 2017, 11:00 am

≫ Next: The Apocalypse Movies That Actually Terrify Us

≪ Previous: An Extensive Photo History Of The Trumps At The Met Gala

We're all guilty of it. You see a comedy, spew popcorn all over the place laughing, and then spend the next several days repeating your favorite jokes to your friends. Days turn into weeks, and before long you've memorized every single line from Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy. People who have never seen Anchorman, didn't find it all that clever, or would like to watch Anchorman without you talking over the actors may find this behavior particularly annoying.

Haters gonna hate, but we totally feel you. Sometimes movie dialogue is so on point that it just has to be treasured, repeated, printed on T-shirts, and so forth. Some lines just sparkle. The serious, somber, important films may win all the awards, but a good poop joke can really stand the test of time.

We'll be regularly updating this list with our favorite lines from films old and new. Read on for the rudest, the crudest, and raddest quotes Hollywood has given us.

"Pardon my French, but Cameron is so tight that if you stuck a lump of coal up his ass, in two weeks you'd have a diamond."
— Ferris Bueller (Matthew Broderick) in *Ferris Bueller's Day Off (1986)*
Paramount/REX/Shutterstock

Nigel Tufnel: The numbers all go to eleven. Look, right across the board, eleven, eleven, eleven and...

Marty DiBergi: Oh, I see. And most amps go up to ten?

Nigel Tufnel: Exactly.

Marty DiBergi: Does that mean it's louder? Is it any louder?

Nigel Tufnel: Well, it's one louder, isn't it? It's not ten. You see, most blokes, you know, will be playing at ten. You're on ten here, all the way up, all the way up, all the way up, you're on ten on your guitar. Where can you go from there? Where?

—Nigel Tufnel (Christopher Guest) and Marty DiBergi (Rob Reiner) in This Is Spinal Tap(1984)

Rando: “Nice wig, Janice. What’s it made of?”

Janis: “Your mom’s chest hair!”

—Janis Ian (Lizzy Kaplan) in Mean Girls(2004)

Lindsay: What 'cha doing?
Andy: Writing in my gournal. I write my thoughts in it every day.
Lindsay: Oh, you mean a journal?
Andy: Yeah, whatever. I guess I'm not all smart like you.

—Andy (Paul Rudd) and Lindsay (Elizabeth Banks) in Wet Hot American Summer

"It's just a flesh wound."

—The Black Knight (John Cleese) during a fight in Monty Python and the Holy Grail(1975)

"What is this? A school for ants?"
- Derek Zoolander (Ben Stiller) in *Zoolander* (2001) after seeing a model of a school he's set to sponsor.
*Pictured: Ben Stiller*
Melinda Sue Gordon/Paramount/Nvp/Red Hour/Village R'Show/REX/Shutterstock

Waiter: "All right. What can I get you guys?"
Shelley: "Instead of the mahi mahi, may I just get the one mahi because I’m not that hungry?"
Waiter: "I'll ask."
— Shelley Darlingson (Anna Faris), *The House Bunny*
Pictured: Anna Faris
Happy Madison Productions/REX/Shutterstock

“I would like to extend to you an invitation to the pants party.”
— Brick Tamland (Steve Carell), *Anchorman*
Pictured: Paul Rudd, Will Ferrell, David Koechner, Steve Carell

Ted Striker: "Surely you can't be serious."
Dr. Rumack: "I am serious... and don't call me Shirley."
-Ted Striker (Robert Hays) and Dr. Rumack (Leslie Nielson) in *Airplane* (1980)
Pictured: Julie Hagerty, Lorna Patterson, Peter Graves, and Leslie Nielson
Paramount Pictures/REX/Shutterstock

"He does dress better than I do. What would I bring to the relationship?"
— Cher (Alicia Silverstone), *Clueless*
*Pictured: Justin Walker and Alicia Silverstone*
Photo: Paramount/Rex/Shutterstock.

Osgood: "You must be quite a girl."
Daphne: "Wanna bet?"
— Osgood (Joe E. Brown) and Daphne/Jerry (Jack Lemmon), *Some Like It Hot*
*Pictured: Jack Lemmon and Tony Curtis*
Photo: SNAP/REX/Shutterstock.

Charles: "How do you do. My name is Charles."
Old man: "Don't be ridiculous, Charles died 20 years ago!"
Charles: "Must be a different Charles, I think."
Old man: "Are you telling me I don't know my own brother!"
— Charles (Hugh Grant) and "Old Man" (Kenneth Griffith), *Four Weddings and a Funeral*
*Pictured: Kristin Scott Thomas and Hugh Grant*
Photo: Polygram/Channel 4/Working Title/REX/Shutterstock.

"I'm more than the exalted ruler of this land and master of all I survey.
I'm also a concerned dad."
-King Jaffe Joffer (James Earl Jones), *Coming to America*
*Pictured: James Earl Jones (center) with Sheila Johnson, Madge Sinclair, and Paul Bates*
Photo: Paramount/Rex/Shutterstock.

DS Andy Wainwright: "You do know there are more guns in the country than there are in the city."
DS Andy Cartwright: "Everyone and their mums is packin' round here!"
Nicholas Angel: "Like who?"
DS Andy Wainwright: "Farmers."
Nicholas Angel: "Who else?"
DS Andy Cartwright: "Farmers' mums."
-The Andys (Rafe Spall and Paddy Considine) and Nicholas Angel (Simon Pegg), *Hot Fuzz*
*Pictured: Nick Frost and Simon Pegg*
Photo: Focus Features/Rex/Shutterstock.

Suzanne: "Ma, I'm middle-aged."
Doris: "Dear, *I'm* middle-aged."
Suzanne: "Really. And how many 120-year-old women do *you* know?"
-Suzanne (Meryl Streep) and Doris (Shirley MacLaine), *Postcards from the Edge*
*Pictured: Streep and MacLaine*
Photo: Columbia/Rex/Shutterstock.

Andrew: "What do you need a fake I.D. for?"
Brian: "So I can vote."
-Andrew (Emilio Estevez) and Brian (Anthony Michael Hall), *The Breakfast Club*
*Pictured: Anthony Michael Hall*
Photo: Universal/REX/Shutterstock.

"This is just like when I watched myself in a sex tape. There was just a lot of floundering and laughable moments."
-Nancy (Miranda Hart), *Spy*
*Pictured: Melissa McCarthy and Miranda Hart*
Photo: Larry D Horricks/20th Century Fox/REX/Shutterstock.

"Americans really have shown themselves to be a nation of ingrates; only by having children can we begin to understand such dynamic."
-Lady Susan (Kate Beckinsale), *Love & Friendship*
*Pictured: Kate Beckinsale*
Photo: Moviestore/REX/Shutterstock.

"My ex-husband described it as watching his favorite pub burn down.”
-Dr. Rawling (Emma Thompson) on childbirth, *Bridget Jones's Baby*
*Pictured: Renée Zellweger as Bridget*
Photo: MovieStore Collection/Rex/Shutterstock.

Jess: "'Baby talk'? That's not a saying."
Harry Burns: "Oh, but 'baby fish mouth' is sweeping the nation? I hear them talking."
-Jess (Bruno Kirby) and Harry (Billy Crystal) playing Pictionary, *When Harry Met Sally*
*Pictured: Meg Ryan and Billy Crystal*
Photo: Moviestore Collection/Rex/Shutterstock.

"You're like a snack-sized Denzel."
-Bob Stone (The Rock), *Central Intelligence*
*Pictured: Kevin Hart and The Rock*
Photo: Moviestore Collection/REX/Shutterstock.

"Is that Tom Hanks from *Cast Away*?"
-Robin (Rebel Wilson), referring to her friend's pubic hair, *How to Be Single*
*Pictured: Dakota Johnson and Rebel Wilson*
Photo: Moviestore/Rex/Shutterstock.

"Looks *are* everything. You ever heard David Beckham speak? It's like he mouth-sexed a can of helium. Think Ryan Reynolds got this far on his superior acting method?"
-Wade Wilson (Ryan Reynolds), *Deadpool*
*Pictured: Ryan Reynolds as Wade Wilson/Deadpool*
Photo: Moviestore/Rex/Shutterstock.

"You're dizzy because you played Russian roulette with your vagina."
-Nellie (Gaby Hoffmann), *Obvious Child*
*Pictured: Jenny Slate in* Obvious Child
Photo: Moviestore/Rex/Shutterstock.

"Take this quarter, go downtown, and have a rat gnaw that thing off your face! Good day to you, madam."
-Buck Russell (John Candy), *Uncle Buck*
*Pictured: John Candy*
Photo: Moviestore Collection/REX/Shutterstock.

Holland March: "Look on the bright side. Nobody got hurt."
Jackson Healy: "People got hurt."
Holland March: "I'm saying, I think they died quickly. So I don't think they got hurt."
-Holland March (Ryan Gosling) and Jackson Healy (Russell Crowe), *The Nice Guys*
*Pictured: Ryan Gosling and Russell Crowe*
Photo: Rex/Shutterstock.

"Anti-wrinkle cream there may be, but anti-fat-bastard cream there is not."
-Dave (Mark Addy), *The Full Monty*
*Pictured: Tom Wilkinson, Robert Carlyle, Steve Huison, Hugo Speer, Paul Barber, and Mark Addy*
Photo: Moviestore/Rex/Shutterstock.

Bumper: "I have a feeling we should kiss. Is that a good feeling or an incorrect feeling?"
Fat Amy: "Well...sometimes I have the feeling I can do crystal meth, but then I think, mmm...better not."
-Bumper (Adam DeVine) and Fat Amy (Rebel Wilson), *Pitch Perfect*
*Pictured: Rebel Wilson*
Photo: Moviestore/Rex/Shutterstock.

Jules: "Pigs are filthy animals. I don't eat filthy animals."
Vincent: "Bacon tastes gooood. Pork chops taste good."
Jules: "Hey, sewer rat may taste like pumpkin pie, but I'd never know 'cause I wouldn't eat the filthy motherfucker. Pigs sleep and root in shit. That's a filthy animal. I ain't eat nothin' that ain't got sense enough to disregard its own feces."
Vincent: "How about a dog? Dogs eats its own feces."
Jules: "I don't eat dog either."
Vincent: "Yeah, but do you consider a dog to be a filthy animal?"
Jules: "I wouldn't go so far as to call a dog filthy but they're definitely dirty. But, a dog's got personality. Personality goes a long way."
Vincent: "Ah, so by that rationale, if a pig had a better personality, he would cease to be a filthy animal. Is that true?"
Jules: "Well we'd have to be talkin' about one charming motherfuckin' pig. I mean he'd have to be 10 times more charmin' than that Arnold on *Green Acres*, you know what I'm sayin'?"
-Jules (Samuel L. Jackson) and Vincent (John Travolta), *Pulp Fiction*
*Pictured: Samuel L. Jackson*
Photo: Snap/Rex/Shutterstock.

Annie: "You read my diary?"
Brynn: "At first I did not know it was your diary, I thought it was a very sad, handwritten book."
-Annie (Kristen Wiig) and Brynn (Rebel Wilson), *Bridesmaids*
*Pictured: Maya Rudolph and Kristen Wiig*
Photo: Moviestore Collection/REX/Shutterstock.

Old Lady: "Are you prepared for Jehovah's return? 'Cause if you're not, we've got a pam..."
[Craig slams the door in their faces.]
Old Lady: "Well, fuck you. Half-dead motherfucker. Come on, sister."
-Old Lady (LaWanda Page) and Craig (Ice Cube), *Friday*
*Pictured: Chris Tucker and Ice Cube*
Photo: Moviestore Collection/Rex/Shutterstock.

Del: "You play with your balls a lot."
Neal: "I do NOT play with my balls."
Del: "Larry Bird doesn't do as much ball-handling in one night as you do in an hour!"
Neal: "Are you trying to start a fight?"
Del: "No. I'm simply stating a fact. That's all. You fidget with your nuts a lot."
Neal: "You know what'd make me happy?"
Del: "Another couple of balls, and an extra set of fingers?"
-Del (John Candy) and Neal (Steve Martin), *Planes, Trains & Automobiles*
*Pictured: Steve Martin*
Photo: Moviestore Collection/Rex/Shutterstock.

Ben Stone: "Do you want to do it doggie style?"
Alison Scott: "You're not going to fuck me like a dog."
Ben Stone: "It's doggie style. It's just the style. We don't have to go outside or anything."
-Ben Stone (Seth Rogen) and Alison Scott (Katherine Heigl), *Knocked Up*
*Pictured: Katherine Heigl and Seth Rogen*
Photo: Moviestore Collection/Rex/Shutterstock.

"We need a little less Forever 21 and a little more Suddenly 42."
-Maura Ellis (Amy Poehler), *Sisters*
*Pictured: Amy Poehler and Tina Fey*
Photo: Moviestore/Rex/Shutterstock.

"I'm sorry, do you have some prior commitment? Some hideous-skirt convention you have to go to?"
-Emily (Emily Blunt), *The Devil Wears Prada*
*Pictured: Anne Hathaway, Meryl Streep, and Emily Blunt*
Photo: Moviestore Collection/REX/Shutterstock.

Like what you see? How about some more R29 goodness, right here?

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The Stand-Out Movie That Won The Hearts Of Sundance Has A Trailer

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↧

The Apocalypse Movies That Actually Terrify Us

April 27, 2017, 11:00 am

≫ Next: These Movies That Will Remind You What It Truly Means To Be Cold

≪ Previous: The Funniest Movie Quotes Of All Time

The end of the world is nigh. Or so we've been told approximately 300 times, until Armageddon was narrowly avoided thanks to a rogue scientist/ unlikely hero/ band of rebels dreamed up by the incredibly paranoid/ relentlessly hopeful people who make movies.

We're about to see one more group of rebel heroes attempt to save us from robot-fueled doom in Terminator Genisys, which stomps into theaters July 1. In this new encounter with Sarah Connor (Emilia Clarke), John Connor (Jason Clarke), Kyle Reese (Jai Courtney), and the Terminator himself (Arnold Schwarzenegger), the challenge they face is the some one we've been grappling with on-screen since long before the Governator first intoned "I'll be back." That is: We're all doomed!

And yet, every fictional depiction of our demise serves a different purpose, from warning us of the idiocy of nuclear warfare ( Dr. Strangelove) and scaring the crap out of us about the consequences of genetic engineering (every modern zombie movie), to cautioning us against environmental disasters and spinning any number of silly allegories in between.

Here, we gather up the best end-of-the-world stories to hit the screen, and take a shot at analyzing what the point of it all is. You know, other than showing us wicked explosions, fire-breathing demons, and zombie swarms.

***Mad Max: Fury Road***(2015)
**How the world ends:** Nuclear attacks strips the earth of its all-natural green goodness, and renders water and gasoline precious commodities. The movie takes place in a desert fortress ruled over by a maniacal tyrant, the Immortan Joe, where people work in exchange for water.
**What's the point?** When commodities are scarce, people are more willing to enter into unbalanced social contracts. Except, of course, if you're the intrepid Furiosa (Charlize Theron), who still remembers that something better (and greener) exists — if she's able to outrun Joe's army on her way there.

**Dawn of the Dead** (2004)
**How the world ends:** Against a mounting zombie apocalypse, a group of people take refuge in a supermarket. But it won't last for long.
**What's the point?** Sometimes, even the most valiant efforts fail us. Death by zombie is inevitable.
Moviestore Collection/REX/Shutterstock

***World War Z***(2013)
**How the world ends:**
A massive zombie plague forges a new world order, and changes global politics as we know them. The story is fittingly narrated by a series of accounts from UN operatives.
**What's the point?**
Take your pick: When it comes to the zombie apocalypse, we're all in the same boat. Nationhood is a construct. The UN is more badass than it appears.
Paramount Pictures/REX/Shutterstock

***Cloud Atlas***(2012)
**How the world ends:**
We're not too sure about the mechanics of the apocalypse, but we do know that it's the year 2321, civilization has collapsed, and people speak a form of pidgin English. Tom Hanks plays a kind hunter-gatherer and Hugh Grant plays a cannibal, so delightful casting overall
**What's the point?**
In this epic adaptation of a David Mitchell novel, the same person is reincarnated over the course of six different lives. It shows how the actions of one life is carried over into the next. Their lives culminate in this apocalypse storyline, which indicates how the human race is carried forward.
Warner Bros./REX/Shutterstock

***Doctor Strangelove, or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb***(1964)
**How the world ends:**
A crazed American general goes full-steam-ahead in an attack on Russia. The catch? The president and his advisors find out that the Russians have a weapon which could annihilate the entire world in the event of American aggression.
**What's the point?**
This dark screwball comedy was largely a creative response to the era's Cold War tensions. With U.S.-Russo relations more of a buzzword than it's been since the Berlin Wall came down, this acclaimed satire is worth a watch.
Hawk Films Prod/Columbia/REX/Shutterstock

**Night of the Comet** (1984)
**How the world ends:**
The same way it did when the dinosaurs went extinct: Earth is in the path of a comet's tail. Most people turn into piles of dust or zombies; the only ones who escape unscathed it are the ones who were shielded from the cosmic rays by steel.
**What's the point?**
This satirical sci-fi comedy teaches us that the end of the world *could* be hilarious. Also, an apocalypse presents a killer opportunity to shop till you drop — and kick the ass of teenage boy mall employees who have been turned into zombies.
Photo: Courtesy of Atlantic Releasing Corporation.

**Waterworld** (1995)
**How the world ends:**
The polar ice caps melt entirely, causing the sea level to rise so high that it covers almost all land on every continent. 400 years later, civilization as we know it is underwater, and the only living humans survive on floating mini-communities. They talk about "Dryland" like a mythical paradise that exists somewhere.
**What's the point?**
You have to adapt to survive. (Kevin Costner's sailor has developed gills and webbing through a mutation.) On a different note, we shouldn't take the seemingly infinite supply of basic environmental resources we have at our disposal now — like dry land for farming and potable water for drinking — for granted. And global warming could affect generations long after we die. Oh, and learn how to swim, just in case.
Photo: Courtesy of Universal Pictures.

**I Am Legend** (2007)
**How the world ends:**
Scientists genetically engineer a measles virus in an attempt to cure cancer. Instead, they create a super-strain of the virus that kills almost the entire population — and turns many of the remaining humans into nocturnal mutants called "Nightseekers." Smith lives virtually alone in a quarantined, dilapidated New York City.
**What's the point?**
Even in pursuit of a noble cure, we need to be extremely cautious with experimental treatments because nature is unpredictable. Also, intrepid action-stars like Will Smith and loyal German shepherds are the kind of company you want to keep in the case of an apocalypse.
Photo: Courtesy of Warner Bros./Roadshow Entertainment.

***The Day After Tomorrow*** (2004)
**How the world ends:**
Global warming, unpredictable weather events and the willful ignorance of politicians.
**What's the point?**
Climate change is real, people! Yes, Jake Gyllenhaal and Emmy Rossum manage to get all cozy while hunkering down in the middle of a mega ice-storm engulfing New York City. But their love story is matched by the more universal and realistic story of people refusing to listen to the dire predictions of climate scientists about the future of planet Earth.
Photo: Courtesy of 20th Century Fox.

**War of the Worlds** (2005)
**How the world ends:**
Giant tripod war machines emerge from underground, having been stored under the Earth's surface for some time. Aliens enter the tripods via lightning bolts and use them to stomp all over cities (and shoot people with laser beams, of course).
**What's the point?**
Family is everything. Ray (Tom Cruise) is not too popular with his kids (Dakota Fanning and Justin Chatwin), but they have to band together to survive. Also, war creates fear — and fear creates chaos. When everybody chooses flight over fight, who will save us?
Photo: Courtesy of Paramount Pictures.

**Planet of the Apes**(1968)
**How the world ends:**
Perhaps the best part about the original *Apes* movie — co-penned by Rod Serling, of *Twilight Zone* fame — is the final twist. For the whole movie, all we know is that the human astronauts crash-landed on a strange alien planet ruled by apes. It isn't until the final scene when Taylor (Charlton Heston) discovers the ruins of the Statue of Liberty that it's revealed they've been on Earth the whole time — and that humanity destroyed itself in a nuclear warfare.
**What's the point?**
What seems like a far-off, foreign future could actually be right around the corner for humanity. At the time, the film was hitting on Cold War fears of the worst-case scenario: a nuclear apocalypse. But the lesson holds true today, too. We could destroy our civilization — and lose it all to the apes — if we can't get along.
Photo: Courtesy of 20th Century Fox.

**Young Ones** (2014)
**How the world ends:**
Drought is the culprit in this sci-fi Western. Water and food are scarce for all but a lucky few, the "water men." People fled the farmlands after it became a desert, but Ernest Holm (the riveting Michael Shannon) stubbornly keeps his family (including a daughter played by Elle Fanning) on the farm in hopes of securing irrigation.
**What's the point?**
It's optimal to sell your farm *before* the drought hits; those who control the water have all the power; dehydration will drive you mad; and seemingly reasonable men (including a seedy fellow played by Nicholas Hoult) can become shockingly violent when it comes to defending themselves and their families.
Photo: Courtesy of Screen Media Films.

***Z For Zachariah*** (2015)
**How the world ends:**
Nuclear war, of course. Those not killed on impact died from radioactivity. Lone survivor Ann (Margot Robbie) is making do on a farm in a valley shielded by hills, weather patterns, and ground water.
**What's the point?**
To show us that in the event of an apocalypse, testosterone is a liability. Ann is doing just fine until scientific engineer Loomis (Chiwetel Ejiofor) comes along. And all is well until the arrival of Caleb (Chris Pine). The men pound their chests and act like jealous assholes in competition for the last woman alive. Long story short: Ladies, we need to stick together.
Photo: Courtesy of Lionsgate Films.

**The Terminator** **Franchise** (1984, 1991, 2003, 2009, 2015)
**How the world ends:**
The U.S. makes a big boo-boo in creating an artificially intelligent defense system (Skynet) that is so advanced, it becomes self-aware and decides to decimate all of mankind — initially by dropping nuclear bombs on Russia to provoke a counterattack.
**What's the point?**
To show how much one individual and her son can impact the future of the world. Also, to make us terrified of robots.
PHOTO: COURTESY OF PARAMOUNT PICTURES.

**Children of Men** (2006)
**How the world ends:**
Infertility in women, though the cause is never explained. With no children in the world, and thus no future, society deteriorates.
**What's the point?**
One poor, pregnant woman (Clare-Hope Ashitey) is discovered and becomes a symbol of hope for all mankind. It's one big "I believe the children are our future" message wrapped in an awesome action movie.
PHOTO: COURTESY OF UNIVERSAL PICTURES.

**Snowpiercer** (2013)
**How the world ends:**
A chemical released into the atmosphere to reverse global warming backfires and freezes the planet. All that's left of humanity lives on a train that perpetually circles the globe.
**What's the point?**
It's a harsh allegorical take on class warfare, and the bureaucrats and scientists who think the poor aren't their problem.
PHOTO: COURTESY OF SNOWPIERCER.

**Interstellar** (2014)
**How the world ends:**
Nitrogen-breathing microorganisms gradually kill off the world's crops, slowly starving and choking every other living thing on Earth.
**What's the point?**
The world's end is a convoluted excuse to get to the fun stuff: time travel and space exploration through wormholes, and the importance of love, even to fancy NASA scientists.
PHOTO: COURTESY OF PARAMOUNT PICTURES.

**Invasion of the Body Snatchers**(1956)
**How the world ends:**
An alien life form plants pods that absorb each person's appearance and memories in their sleep, replacing them with a calm, emotionless version of their normal human selves.
**What's the point?**
Don't let outside forces (i.e. The Man!) turn you into a conforming "pod person" — fight to stay yourself at all costs.
PHOTO: COURTESY OF WALTER WANGER PRODUCTIONS.

**This Is the End**(2013)
**How the world ends:**
Massive earthquakes, fires, and giant beasts from hell, straight out of the Bible. Meanwhile, all the good guys get beamed up to heaven.
**What's the point?**
This all goes down during a crazy bender at James Franco's house, offering a winking glimpse into how these comedians cope — cooperate, turn on each other, cower like children, and, yeah, do all the drugs — when the shit hits the fan.
Photo: Courtesy of Columbia Pictures.

**Dr. Strangelove or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb** (1964)
**How the world ends:**
Air Force General Jack D. Ripper (Sterling Hayden) goes nuts and thinks the Soviets are poisoning us via fluoridated water, and it just so happens he has the power to order a nuclear attack without the president's authorization. The U.S. and USSR figure out the error, but it's too late to reverse the process because the Russians have installed a doomsday device that automatically destroys all life on the surface of the Earth if their country is attacked.
**What's the point?**
To underscore that the concept of mutually assured destruction (if both countries could wipe each other out, no one will strike first), is so dangerous and absurd, all we can do is laugh about it.
PHOTO: COURTESY OF COLUMBIA PICTURES.

**Warm Bodies** (2013)
**How the world ends:**
The cause of the zombie virus outbreak is never really explored, though the important thing to know here is that zombies aren't entirely without human feeling. Surviving people have been forced to carve out their existence in a fortified stadium.
**What's the point?**
True love — and eating the brains of a true love — can conquer almost anything, even a zombie virus. And it's important to look past the color of others' skin, even if it's gray and rotting.
PHOTO: COURTESY OF SUMMIT ENTERTAINMENT.

**Seeking a Friend for the End of the World**(2012)
**How the world ends:**
An asteroid is headed straight for us, and all efforts to divert it have already failed.
**What's the point?**
It's actually quite fun to imagine what you'd do — and what you would stop doing — if you knew with absolute certainty that the world would end in three weeks.
PHOTO: COURTESY OF FOCUS FEATURES.

**The Day After** (1983)
**How the world ends:**
The Cold War heats up when the Soviets threaten to invade West Germany and peace talks fail. The USSR and the U.S. bomb each other almost simultaneously. In the aftermath, many survivors of the blasts suffer from radiation poisoning.
**What's the point?**
This massively popular TV movie succeeded in scaring the whole country anew about how rapidly war could escalate — even President Reagan and the Joint Chiefs of Staff were moved by the film.
PHOTO: COURTESY OF ABC CIRCLE FILMS.

**Melancholia**(2011)
**How the world ends:**
A rogue planet enters our solar system and collides with Earth.
**What's the point?**
As director Lars von Trier sees it, depressed people like Justine (Kirsten Dunst) actually rejoice in the end of the world; it's confirmation of all their melancholic thoughts. Happy people like Justine's sister Claire (Charlotte Gainsbourg), on the other hand, are the ones with too much to lose.
PHOTO: COURTESY OF ZENTROPA ENTERTAINMENTS.

**The *Mad Max* Franchise** (1979, 1981, 1985, 2015)
**How the world ends:**
Scarce resources lead to oil wars and the collapse of civilized society. There's some nuclear warfare thrown in the mix, too.
**What's the point?**
Well, besides showing us a lot of car chases through deserts and a bunch of cool costumes, these movies ponder what might happen to mankind if we were reduced to our primitive nature. Would only the toughest survive?
PHOTO: COURTESY OF KENNEDY MILLER PRODUCTIONS.

**Zombieland** (2009)
**How the world ends:**
Mad cow disease mutates into a human zombie virus and wipes out most of the population within two months.
**What's the point?**
To show how a regular guy like Jesse Eisenberg's Columbus can survive by laying low and not being a hero. But when he does decide to rise to the occasion and actually care about others, survival actually has more appeal.
PHOTO: COURTESY OF COLUMBIA PICTURES.

**The Road** (2009)
**How the world ends:**
We have no idea what causes it, but everything's cold, the sun doesn't come out, and all plant and animal life has died. At this point, everyone's just roaming the earth in search of old canned food, or other people to eat.
**What's the point?**
The unnamed man (Viggo Mortensen) lives only to keep his son (Kodi Smit-McPhee) alive. He tries to teach the boy how to remain good and human without descending into savage instincts like others they encounter, because survival is about more than just the body.
PHOTO: COURTESY OF DIMENSION FILMS.

The *Matrix* **Trilogy**(1999, 2003)
**How the world ends:**
The seemingly inevitable conflict between sentient machines and humans escalates so far that humans first decide to block out the sun (eliminating the machines' access to solar power), then to deploy nuclear missiles. The machines retaliate with a flesh-eating plague and more bombs. Finally, they enslave the surviving humans as their new power source.
**What's the point?**
To give us the creeps about virtual reality and our reliance on technology, and to burst open our minds about different levels of perception.
PHOTO: COURTESY OF WARNER BROS.

**12 Monkeys** (1995)
**How the world ends:**
A deadly virus that may or may not have been unleashed by an animal rights group has wiped out most of mankind. The survivors live underground and have figured out time travel in the meantime.
**What's the point?**
Traveling back in time to stop this cataclysm from happening is actually much harder than you think, especially if you don't have all your facts straight. Oops.
Photo: Courtesy of Universal Pictures.

**28 Days Later**(2003)
**How the world ends:**
Animal rights activists (again!) raid a lab to free chimpanzees, which happen to be infected with a virus called "Rage" that spreads from the activists to most of Great Britain. The infected become rabid zombies. As you might guess from the presence of a sequel (2007's *28 Weeks Later*), it doesn't stop there.
**What's the point?**
To reveal that zombies aren't the only monsters around, as exhibited by the military's "solution," which involves using women as sex slaves.
PHOTO: COURTESY OF DNA FILMS.

**On the Beach** (1959)
**How the world ends:**
Nuclear bombing during World War III has wiped out the Northern Hemisphere, and the fallout is now traveling south, killing everyone with radiation sickness. In Australia, people are given suicide pills to take when they choose.
**What's the point?**
This plea to prevent nuclear warfare (based on a 1957 novel) was even screened in Moscow at the time of its release, and it ends with the message "There is still time... Brother." So that's kind of straightforward.
PHOTO: COURTESY OF STANLEY KRAMER PRODUCTIONS.

**WALL-E**(2008)
**How the world ends:**
Thanks to efficient mega-corporations, humans finally buy so much useless stuff that the whole world becomes an uninhabitable trash heap. Humans take off into space stations leaving behind robots to clean up their mess, but the mechanical creatures decide that's not worth the bother, either.
**What's the point?**
To cast a critical eye on excessive consumerism, and to show that love can grow in even the bleakest of conditions.
PHOTO: COURTESY OF PIXAR.

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↧

These Movies That Will Remind You What It Truly Means To Be Cold

April 27, 2017, 11:00 am

≫ Next: Everything We Know About HAIM's New Album

≪ Previous: The Apocalypse Movies That Actually Terrify Us

Photo: Courtesy of Buena Vista Pictures Distribution; Illustrated by Mallory Heyer.

The Weeknd can't feel his face. You can't feel your face, your toes, or your fingers, and you're fairly certain that your ears now resemble two frozen Jimmy Dean sausage patties. Welcome to winter, everyone!

Unless you're off to Gstaad for a spot of skiing with Mitzi and Lance, there's really only way to get through the sub-zero temps and slippery surfaces: a good old-fashioned movie night, served up with a roaring fire (okay, a space heater), some warming brandy, and the takeout some poor delivery driver had to bike through a snowstorm to bring you.

Winter, you see, is one of those things that seems better than it is. In films, it's beautiful and ethereal. In real life, it's cold and slushy. In films, you might become pals with a talking snowman or at least fling at few snowballs at Bill Murray. In real life, the only winter sport you're taking part in is falling on your ass on the sidewalk in front of large groups of people.

Long story short: Save yourself the frostbite, pull on those fleece jammies, and enjoy winter through the lens of Hollywood. It's just so much cozier.

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***White Nights***(1985)
**Where:** Siberia and St. Petersburg
**Brief Summary:** Nikolai 'Kolya' Rodchenko is a world-famous ballet dancer, and a defector from the Soviet Union. When his plane crashes in Siberia, he's recognized as a defector and kept in Leningrad, where he and a rival dancer are determined to make it to the American consulate.
**How You Can Tell It Is Cold:** Did we mention Siberia in winter?
**Is It Cooler Than Cool?** It's Cold War cool.
Moviestore Collection/REX/Shutterstock

*Sunshine*(2007)
**Where:** Earth during apocalyptic "solar winter" as the sun slowly dies.
**Brief summary:** A few astronauts go off on a last-ditch mission to space to kickstart a dying sun. Things don't go to plan.
**How You Can Tell It Is Cold:** There's nothing like a dying sun to put a chill in your spirit.
**Is It Cooler Than Cool?:** This acclaimed sci-fi film flies under the radar. If you've seen it, you can add a badge to your "cool person" vest.
Fox Searchlight/REX/Shutterstock

*Into The Wild*(2007)
**Where:** Alaska
**Brief Summary:** Christopher McCandless's youthful hubris compels him to venture into the Alaskan wilderness and live off the grid. He has ideals and ambition, but inadequate practical planning.
**How You Can Tell It Is Cold:** Chris arrives in the summer. But summer in Alaska is fleeting, and winter is always threatening to rear its icy head.
**Is It Cooler Than Cool?:** Perhaps the film's ending could've been avoided had someone told Chris that he didn't need to move to Alaska in an RV to be cool.
River Road/Paramount/REX/Shutterstock

*Winter's Bone*(2010)
**Where:** America's Ozark Mountains
**Brief Summary:** To spare her family from eviction, an Ozark Mountain teenager must track down her missing father, navigating the bleak terrain of rural poverty.
**How You Can Tell It Is Cold:** Jennifer Lawrence wears a hat in every scene.
**Is It Cooler Than Cool?:** There's nothing colder than operating within a confining societal structure and systematic poverty.
Moviestore Collection/REX/Shutterstock

*Joyeux Noel*(2005)
**Where:** The Western front in France during WWI
**Brief Summary:** On Christmas Eve in 1914, German, Scottish, and French troops call a moment of truce, share stories of friendship and love, and reach a place of empathy.
**How You Can Tell It Is Cold:** It's Christmas Eve on a war front with trenches. It's *beyond* cold. It's something much worse.
**Is It Cooler Than Cool?:** It's too sappy to be "cool," but it's not too sappy to be great.
Courtesy of Sony

**Cool Runnings** **(1993)**
**Where:** Jamaica and Calgary
**Brief Summary:** The true story of the Jamaican bobsled team’s first stint in the Olympics.
**How You Can Tell It Is Cold:** When you’re used to the Caribbean, Calgary is just cruel.
**Is It Cooler Than Cool?:** Of course. It’s cool runnings.
Photo: Courtesy of Walt Disney Studios

**Beautiful Girls** **(1996)**
**Where:** Knights Ridge, Massachusetts
**Brief Summary:** Willie Conway (Timothy Hutton) has a 30-something crisis when he comes home for his high school reunion, contemplating his future and spending way too much time with his 13-year-old neighbor (Natalie Portman).
**How You Can Tell It Is Cold:** Figure skating, sweaters, the usual
**Is It Cooler Than Cool?:** It's a lil' chilly
Photo: Moviestore Collection/REX/Shutterstock.

*Misery* (1990)
**Where:** The very snowy Silver Creek, Colorado
**Brief Summary:** Novelist Paul Sheldon (James Caan) crashes his car during a snowstorm, and is then held hostage by his number one fan, Annie Wilkes (Kathy Bates). At least she's got heating.
**How You Can Tell It Is Cold**: Lotta snowbanks, lotta shearling
I **s It Cooler Than Cool?:** It's frigid
Photo: SNAP/REX/Shutterstock.

**The Revenant** **(2015)**
**Where:** Mountainous, unorganized territory in the Dakotas
**Brief Summary:** Guide Hugh Glass (Leonardo DiCaprio) tries to survive a murderous fur trapper, an Arikara war party, and one pissed-off bear.
**How You Can Tell It Is Cold:** Dude has icicles forming in his beard.
**Is It Cooler Than Cool?:** It's ice cold.
Photo: Kimberley French/20th Century Fox/Regency Enterprises/REX/Shutterstock.

**Snowpiercer**
**Where:** A permanently moving train in a snowy dystopia
**Brief Summary:** The last remaining members of the human race are split into class groups on a train. The lower class challenges the system.
**How You Can Tell It Is Cold:** The movie itself is pretty blue.
**Is It Cooler Than Cool?:** It's frigid.
Photo: Courtesy of RADiUS-TWC.

**The Day After Tomorrow**
**Where:** The globe, but mainly New York City
**Brief Summary:** The apocalypse occurs and the world freezes over.
**How You Can Tell It Is Cold:** Everything — including the interiors — of New York City is coated in ice.
**Is It Cooler Than Cool?:** It's ice cold!
Photo: Courtesy of 20th Century Fox.

**30 Days Of Night**
**Where:** Barrow, Alaska
**Brief Summary:** The town experiences literally 30 days where the sun don't shine because of how far north it is. Vampires obviously come out to play.
**How You Can Tell It Is Cold:** Snow, frozen blood, visible breath — you know.
**Is It Cooler Than Cool?:** It's frigid.
Photo: Courtesy of Columbia Pictures.

**Die Another Day**
**Where:** North Korea, but the chilly parts happen at an ice palace in Iceland.
**Brief Summary:** James Bond seeks revenge on an agent he believes betrayed him. Things get shaken *and* stirred.
**How You Can Tell It Is Cold:** Well, it has to be pretty chilly to keep an ice hotel from melting.
**Is It Cooler Than Cool?:** It's a lil' chilly.
Photo: Courtesy of Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer.

**Dreamcatcher**
**Where:** Maine
**Brief Summary:** Four telepathic friends encounter aliens while out on a hunting trip in the woods.
**How You Can Tell It Is Cold:** Blue tones, snow, and lots of parkas.
**Is It Cooler Than Cool?:** It's frigid.
Photo: Courtesy of Warner Bros.

**Eight Below**
**Where:** Antarctica
**Brief Summary:** A guide embarks on a treacherous trek to find a meteorite with the help of sled dogs.
**How You Can Tell It Is Cold:** It's in Antarctica.
**Is It Cooler Than Cool?:** It's ice cold
Photo: Courtesy of Buena Vista Pictures.

**Fargo**
**Where:** Fargo, North Dakota
**Brief Summary:** Pregnant police chief tries to solve "homespun murder mystery."
**How You Can Tell It Is Cold:** Snow, snow, snow!
**Is It Cooler Than Cool?:** It's frigid.
Photo: Courtesy of Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer.

**Doctor Zhivago**
**Where:** Russia
**Brief Summary:** Russian doctor/poet falls in love with politicians wife despite being married.
**How You Can Tell It Is Cold:** It's Russia, man.
**Is It Cooler Than Cool?:** It's frigid.
Photo: Courtesy of Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer.

**Christmas Vacation**
**Where:** Suburbs of Chicago
**Brief Summary:** The good ol' American family Christmas celebration turns out to be one big ol' disaster.
**How You Can Tell It Is Cold:** It's Christmas time outside the Windy City. Expect cold. Oh, and lots of sweaters.
**Is It Cooler Than Cool?:** It's a lil' chilly.
Photo: Courtesy of Warner Bros.

**Frozen**
**Where**: Arendelle
**Brief Summary:** Princess with magical powers freezes an entire town with her hands.
**How You Can Tell It Is Cold:** The name itself should be a dead giveaway, but you literally watch a town turn to ice.
**Is It Cooler Than Cool?:** It's ice cold.
Photo: Courtesy of Disney.

**Alive**
**Where:** The Andes
**Brief Summary:** Rugby team tries to stay alive after plane crashes in mountains.
**How You Can Tell It Is Cold:** Snow! Everywhere!
**Is It Cooler Than Cool?:** It's frigid.
Photo: Courtesy of Buena Vista Pictures.

**The Grey**
**Where:** Alaska
**Brief Summary:** A wolf pack threatens a group of plane crash survivors being lead by a huntsman through Alaska.
**How You Can Tell It Is Cold:** Liam Neeson! Kidding. It's Alaska.
**Is It Cooler Than Cool?:** It's frigid.
Photo: Courtesy of Open Road Films.

**Home Alone**
**Where:** Chicago
**Brief Summary:** Boy gets stranded at home by clueless family is forced to deal with burglars.
**How You Can Tell It Is Cold:** Again, it's Chicago in the winter.
**Is It Cooler Than Cool?:** It's a lil' chilly
Photo: Courtesy of 20th Century Fox.

**Iceman**
**Where:** An Arctic base
**Brief Summary:** Arctic exploration discovers a Neanderthal in the ice and has to decide what to do when he's revived.
**How You Can Tell It Is Cold:** Well, the man was found in ice...
**Is It Cooler Than Cool?:** It's ice cold.
Photo: Courtesy of Universal Studios.

**The Ice Storm**
**Where:** Connecticut
**Brief Summary:** The trials and tribulations of a suburban, well-off family.
**How You Can Tell It Is Cold:** Long coats and frigid personalities
**Is It Cooler Than Cool?:** It's a lil' chilly
Photo: Courtesy of Fox Searchlight Pictures.

**Happy Feet**
**Where:** Antarctica
**Brief Summary:** In a world where soul mates are found through singing, one penguin is born without a singing voice.
**How You Can Tell It Is Cold:** Uh, Antarctica?
**Is It Cooler Than Cool?:** It's ice cold.
Photo: Courtesy of Warner Bros. Pictures.

**The Chronicles Of Narnia: The Lion, The Witch, And The Wardrobe**
**Where:** Narnia
**Brief Summary:** Children discover a portal to the magical world of Narnia through their wardrobe and must help defeat the Ice Queen.
**How You Can Tell It Is Cold:** Lots of white and snow.
**Is It Cooler Than Cool?:** It's frigid.
Photo: Courtesy of Buena Vista Pictures Distribution.

**Serendipity**
**Where:** New York City
**Brief Summary:** Former couple reunites after years of being apart from one another.
**How You Can Tell It Is Cold:** There's snow and snow in New York means it's freakin' cold.
**Is It Cooler Than Cool?:** It's frigid.
Photo: Courtesy of Miramax Films.

**March Of The Penguins**
**Where:** Antarctica
**Brief Summary:** A documentary following penguins on their march to their breeding ground. Morgan Freeman narrates.
**How You Can Tell It Is Cold:** Again, it's Antarctica.
**Is It Cooler Than Cool?:** It's ice cold.
Photo: Courtesy of Warner Independent Pictures.

**Hanna**
**Where:** Northern Europe
**Brief Summary:** Teenage assassin is on the run from an intelligence agency
**How You Can Tell It Is Cold:** Boatloads of fur outfits and scarves.
**Is It Cooler Than Cool?:** It's frigid.
Photo: Courtesy of Focus Features.

**Mystery, Alaska**
**Where:** Mystery, Alaska
**Brief Summary:** Small town gets a little too excited it was chosen to host a television event.
**How You Can Tell It Is Cold:** Um, Alaska...
**Is It Cooler Than Cool?:** It's frigid.
Photo: Courtesy of Buena Vista Pictures.

**Wind Chill**
**Where:** Pennsylvania to Delaware
**Brief Summary:** Ghosts of people who've died on a road haunt two college students on their way home.
**How You Can Tell It Is Cold:** Wintertime on the East Coast means chilly temps.
**Is It Cooler Than Cool?:** It's a lil' chilly.
Photo: Courtesy of TriStar Pictures.

**The Shining**
**Where:** The Stanley Hotel, Colorado
**Brief Summary:** Family takes care of haunted hotel during winter. Man goes berserk.
**How You Can Tell It Is Cold:** Jack Nicholson's face freezes at one point.
**Is It Cooler Than Cool?:** It's frigid.
Photo: Courtesy of Warner Bros.

**A Simple Plan**
**Where:** Minnesota
**Brief Summary:** Working class friends stumble across a ton of money and try to hide it from the authorities.
**How You Can Tell It Is Cold:** Down jackets and beanies.
**Is It Cooler Than Cool?:** It's frigid.
Photo: Courtesy of Paramount Pictures.

**Snow Day**
**Where:** Syracuse, New York
**Brief Summary:** School's canceled due to snow, kids play.
**How You Can Tell It Is Cold:** Having grown up in Syracuse, I can vouch how cold it becomes in the snow capitol of the Northeast.
**Is It Cooler Than Cool?:** It's frigid.
Photo: Courtesy of Paramount Pictures.

**Star Wars – Episode V: The Empire Strikes Back**
**Where:** A galaxy far, far away
**Brief Summary:** The rebels have taken control of the Empire while Luke Skywalker trains with Yoda. Darth Vader's pursuit continues.
**How You Can Tell It Is Cold:** Snow, ice, and big, roomy spacesuits.
**Is It Cooler Than Cool?:** It's ice cold.
Photo: Courtesy of Lucasfilm.

**The Thing**
**Where:** Antarctica
**Brief Summary:** Scientists must deal with a shape-shifting alien that assumes the appearance of each person it kills.
**How You Can Tell It Is Cold:** Ice, everywhere.
**Is It Cooler Than Cool?:** It's ice cold.
Photo: Courtesy of Universal Pictures.

**Cold Mountain**
**Where:** Cold Mountain in provincial North Carolina.
**Brief Summary:** Despite the name of the movie, this setting isn't the coldest one on the list. But, the people themselves have cold hearts.
**How You Can Tell It Is Cold:** Snow falls at some point, plus everyone has it out for one another. If only more snow fell to justify their bitterness.
**Is It Cooler Than Cool?:** It's a lil' chilly.
Photo: Courtesy of Miramax Films.

**White Christmas**
**Where:** Vermont
**Brief Summary:** A group of performers help a retired army general save his mountain hotel from a bleak season due to the lack of snow. (This is a wild card inclusion, we know.)
**How You Can Tell It Is Cold:** Snow, snow, snow!
**Is It Cooler Than Cool?:** It's a lil' chilly
Photo: Courtesy of Paramount Pictures.

**Ice Age**
**Where:** Somewhere during the Ice Age
**Brief Summary:** A group of animal buds try to return a lost baby to its tribe.
**How You Can Tell It Is Cold:** Um, it's the Ice Age. Of course it's cold!
**Is It Cooler Than Cool?:** It's ice cold.
Photo: Courtesy of 20th Century Fox.

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↧

Everything We Know About HAIM's New Album

April 27, 2017, 11:00 am

≫ Next: How To Watch Everything That Goes Down At The White House Correspondents' Dinner

≪ Previous: These Movies That Will Remind You What It Truly Means To Be Cold

It’s been four years since the release of sister trio HAIM’s first album, Days Are Gone. The twentysomethings’ unique sound instantly captured our attention, and gave us the break-up song we never knew we needed in “The Wire.”

Este, Danielle, and Alana Haim had been practicing for this moment their whole lives. Hailing from a Los Angeles, the three sisters played instruments in their family band, Rockinhaim, for years before going solo. While HAIM first formed in 2007 and played sparse, infrequent gigs, it was only until 2012 that the sisters went full steam ahead on their musical careers. And it paid off, big time: HAIM was nominated for Best New Artist at the 57th Annual Grammy Awards, and the sisters were initiated into the inner sanctum of Taylor Swift's friend group.

After releasing their smash hit debut album, Este, Danielle, and Alana Haim retreated into their music-writing enclave. At last, after weeks of cryptic teasing, the sister trio HAIM finally announced a release date for their sophomore album, Something to Tell You. Here’s everything we know about forthcoming follow-up.

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We have a release date!

After weeks of mysterious signals, like billboards popping up in London, Berlin, and on the highway to Coachella, HAIM finally gave a straightforward message. Their sophomore album, Something to Tell You, will drop on July 7, 2017.

@HaimTheST

You can listen to the first single, “Right Now,” right now.

HAIM also debuted the video for “Right Now,” which was directed by legendary director Paul Thomas Anderson ( The Master, There Will Be Blood). In the bare-bones video, catch a glimpse of the Haim sisters’ recording process in action.

HAIM and Paul Thomas Anderson have a surprising connection.

The Haim sisters have a connection with director P.T. Anderson that goes way, way back. Their mother, Donna, was Anderson’s elementary school art teacher in Los Angeles.

HAIM reached out to Anderson with new singles from their album. As Alana explained to Beats 1 radio, “He comes to the studio the next day and we showed him the songs and were listening to it, and he was like 'Why don’t we just shoot this?'" As you can see in the video, that’s just what they did.

@haimtheband

Lucky concertgoers got a taste for Something to Tell You last year.

HAIM debuted two new songs, "Nothing's Wrong" and "Little of Your Love," at concerts in 2016.

For more singles, watch Saturday Night Live.

The band will be performing on the May 13 episode, hosted by Melissa McCarthy.

@nbcsnl

The songs on the album will have a common theme.

In an interview with Rolling Stone, Danielle Haim said many of the new album’s songs are about, "Trying to go back to your normal life, but realizing there is a difference." Ah, the price one pays for fame.

@haimtheband

Vampire Weekend fans might especially like the album.

For a few tracks, HAIM teamed up with producer Rostam Batmanglij, a former member of Vampire Weekend.

@matsor

HAIM’s getting back to their rock roots.

On the first album, HAIM experimented with organic and non-organic sounds. This time around, HAIM didn’t use samples on their album the same way.

As Danielle explained to Rolling Stone, “We still love that, but this time we came at it from a more organic, rock standpoint. Because when we play live, we realize that ultimately, we're a rock band."

@haimtheband

And since it's been four years, a quick refresher.

"HAIM" rhymes with time.

@haimtheband

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↧

How To Watch Everything That Goes Down At The White House Correspondents' Dinner

April 27, 2017, 11:10 am

≫ Next: Heartbreaking Movies You Should Never Watch Alone

≪ Previous: Everything We Know About HAIM's New Album

What do you get when you bring one Daily Show correspondent, two legendary reporters, and many members of the press corps to the Washington Hilton for a White House Correspondents' Dinner — without the president? Answer: A very strange and unprecedented event.

This Saturday, April 29, members of the media will gather to celebrate reporting achievements and up-and-coming scholars. But the standard roast of the sitting commander-in-chief will be different than usual, since President Trump will not be in Washington. Instead, he’ll be hosting a rally in Pennsylvania.

It will be interesting to see how comedic host Hasan Minhaj handles the president’s absence and which, if any, celebrities decide to show up. Some will be skipping the event to attend Samantha Bee’s nearby Not The White House Correspondents’ Dinner, which may prove to be the more entertaining of the two.

If you want to compare and contrast the events, start by watching the real White House Correspondents’ Dinner, which will stream live on C-Span beginning at 9:30 p.m.

SATURDAY: 2017 White House Correspondents' Association Dinner – LIVE at 9:30pm ET on C-SPAN https://t.co/KErQ7XmnDT #nerdprom #WHCD2017 pic.twitter.com/sCQg4ypL4s
— CSPAN (@cspan) April 26, 2017

Then, at 11 p.m. head to Twitter, where you can catch an uncensored version of Samantha Bee’s #NTWHCD.

These Saturday night plans will definitely keep you on the couch, but we're pretty sure they'll be just as wild as a crazy night out.

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↧

Heartbreaking Movies You Should Never Watch Alone

April 27, 2017, 11:10 am

≫ Next: Fans Of The Simpsons Will Love This New Beauty Collection

≪ Previous: How To Watch Everything That Goes Down At The White House Correspondents' Dinner

We are not robots. We feel things. We can't survive on comedic bromances and CGI-ed action sequences alone. We like our joy, but we need our sadness, too. So bring a box of Kleenex and settle in for some melancholic movie-watching. It's not about wallowing in misery. It's about getting lost in a story that captures the full human experience, with all of its highs and lows.

A good drama hits you right where it hurts, whether it's Blue Valentine 's broken romance or Fruitvale Station 's sense of injustice. If these cinematic tear-jerkers don't have you crying, keening, and curling up into a little ball, we don't know what will.

**Like Crazy**(2011)
Anna and x fall headfirst into a furious, passionate, life-altering kind of love at the end of their senior year of college. The only issue? In an oversight of the heart, Anna (Felicity Jones) overstays her student visa, and is banned from reentering the United States. With Jacob (Anton Yelchin) in Los Angeles and Anna in London, their love is strained under transatlantic pressures.
Moviestore/REX/Shutterstock

***Awakenings***(1990)
After three decades spent in a catatonic state, victims of the epidemic of *encephalitis lethargica* are given another chance at life when a doctor finds a miracle cure. Starring Robert DeNiro and Robin Williams, *Awakenings* is based on the true story of Oliver Sacks, who discovered benefits of the new drug L-Dopa. Think *Sleeping Beauty*, but more true and way more tear-jerking.
Louis Goldman/Columbia/REX/Shutterstock

***Ordinary People***
In this bleak movie burdened by grief, an extremely wealthy Chicago family is torn apart by the tragic death of their eldest son. After his brother's death, a guilt-ridden Buck attempts suicide. The movie starts when Buck returns home and attempts to reconnect with his cold, angry mother (Mary Tyler Moore) and his wounded father (Donald Sutherland).
Paramount/REX/Shutterstock

***Into the Wild***(2007)
A movie that portrays the dark underbelly of youthful adventures, *Into the Wild* is further proof that if you're going to take an adventure in Alaska, *please* bring your guidebook along.
River Road/Paramount/REX/Shutterstock

***The Pianist***(2002)
Based on a true story, *The Pianist* is about a man who spends the entirety of WWII hiding and in extreme isolation. Wladyslaw Szpilman (Adrien Brody) is a Polish Jewish pianist who lives in Warsaw, and sees his neighborhood shift at the start of the war. He moves into the Jewish Ghetto with his family, but they're later separated. Wladyslaw drifts around the ruins of Warsaw in this quiet, devastating film.
Guy Ferrandis/Focus Features/Studio Canal/REX/Shutterstock

***The Green Mile***(1999)
Stephen King doesn't just pen terrifying stories like It and *The Shining;* he writes devastating ones, too. In *The Green Mile*, a group of Death Row prison guards are forever changed by a convict who's unlike the rest of the bunch. Paul Edgecombe (Tom Hanks) had never met anyone like John Coffey (Michael Clarke Duncan), thrown in the pen for the supposed murder of two little girls. Along with his gentle and naive spirit, John is also graced with something that's decidedly, well – divine. Could he really be a murderer?
Ralph Jr Nelson/Castle Rock/Warner Bros/REX/Shutterstock

**Sunset Boulevard** (1950)
This 1950 Billy Wilder masterpiece is a noirish, cautionary tale of life after fame. Gloria Swanson's Norma Desmond is believed to be a composite of many of the silent film era starlets who descended into reclusiveness and madness after fading into obscurity.
*Pictured: Gloria Swanson*
Photo: Courtesy of Paramount Pictures.

**Bridge to Terabithia**(2007)
This book made us cry as kids, and the movie made us cry as adults. This charming fantasy adventure film has an ending that’s all too real.
Kristy Griffen/Walt Disney Pictures/Walden Media/REX/Shutterstock

**Still Alice** (2014)
Julianne Moore’s titular character, Alice, is a professor of at Columbia University. After a few incidents of disorientation, she’s diagnosed with early onset dementia. The film tracks her descent into the sickness and the toll Alzheimer’s takes on family life. Heartbreaking, emotional, and for many families, all too relatable.
Jojo Whilden/Killer Films/Big Indie Pictures/Sony

**I, Daniel Blake** (2016)
Daniel Blake (Dave Johns) just can't catch a break when a heart attack puts him out of work. Named Best British Film at the 2017 BAFTAs, this Ken Loach drama is an indictment on the welfare system and bureaucratic red tape that'll leave you outraged and heartbroken.
*Pictured: Dave Johns and Hayley Squires*
Photo: Moviestore/REX/Shutterstock.

**The English Patient** (1996)
We're such slaves to tragic romances set during wartime, aren't we? This Anthony Minghella-directed epic starring Ralph Fiennes and Queen of Fucking Everything Kristin Scott Thomas reduced romantics to tears and has a pile of Oscars to show for it.
*Pictured: Ralph Fiennes and Kristin Scott Thomas*
Photo: Phil Bray/Tiger Moth/Miramax/REX/Shutterstock.

**White Material** (2009)
If you're on a Isabelle Huppert kick thanks to *Elle*, consider this incredibly intense French drama set in an unnamed African country on the brink of civil war. Huppert plays a coffee plantation owner determined to stay afloat at all costs. To say things get bleak is an understatement.
*Pictured: Isabelle Huppert*
Photo: Canal+/REX/Shutterstock.

**The Greatest** (2009)
A family's struggle to come to terms with the death of their son grows more complicated when it's revealed that his girlfriend is pregnant with his child.
*Pictured: Aaron Taylor-Johnson and Carey Mulligan*
Photo: Barbarian Films/REX/Shutterstock.

***My Sister's Keeper*** (2009)
Based on Jodi Picoult's novel, this tear-jerker focuses on a family with two daughters: one diagnosed with leukemia and the other conceived via IVF as a "savior sister," meaning she's a medical match who can theoretically donate organs. Drama ensues when the younger sister (Abigail Breslin) sues for medical emancipation.
*Pictured: Abigail Breslin and Sofia Vassilieva*
Photo: Mark Johnson Productions/REX/Shutterstock.

**E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial** (1982)
Rumor has it that there are people who have watched this without breaking down, but we don't know who they are.
*Pictured: E.T.*
Photo: Universal/REX/Shutterstock.

**Toy Story 3** (2010)
We're not crying during a kid's movie. *You're* crying during a kid's movie.
*Pictured: Andy deals Buzz and Woody a harsh blow.*
Photo: Moviestore/REX/Shutterstock.

**Beginners** (2010)
Directed by Mike Mills of *20th Century Women* fame, this heartfelt drama about a man recovering from the loss of his father earned Christopher Plummer an Oscar for Best Supporting Actor.
*Pictured: Christopher Plummer and Ewan McGregor*
Photo: Snap Stills/REX/Shutterstock.

**Requiem for a Dream** (2000)
Darren Aronofky's supremely depressing drugs drama is one long "Just Say No" PSA.
*Pictured: Ellen Burstyn*
Photo: John Baer/Artisan Pictures/REX/Shutterstock.

**Field of Dreams** (1989)
You don't have to be a dude with daddy issues, or even a baseball fan, to be moved by this tale about second chances.
*Pictured: Kevin Costner and James Earl Jones*
Photo: Universal/Gordon/REX/Shutterstock.

**The Light Between Oceans** (2016)
Real-life couple Alicia Vikander and Michael Fassbender star as a married couple who try to pass off a newborn baby girl they've found as their own child. All goes well until the baby's birth mother resurfaces.
*Pictured: Alicia Vikander*
Photo: MOVIESTORE COLLECTION LTD/REX/Shutterstock.

**Manchester by the Sea** (2016)
Catching one of the year's most critically acclaimed films comes with a price: buckets of tears. Grief is at the heart of this story about a man tapped to raise his late brother's teen son.
*Pictured: Kyle Chandler and Casey Affleck*
Photo: Courtesy of Roadside Attractions/Amazon Studio.

**Edge of Seventeen** (2016)
Hailee Steinfeld's new drama is more emotionally piercing than you might expect from a film aimed at teens. You'll leave feeling grateful that your high school days are behind you.
*Pictured: Hailee Steinfeld and Woody Harrelson*
Photo: MOVIESTORE COLLECTION LTD/REX/Shutterstock.

**My Life Without Me** (2003)
Sarah Polley plays a young woman who keeps her terminal ovarian cancer a secret from her husband and children, choosing instead to embark on new experiences.
*Pictured: Sarah Polley and Mark Ruffalo*
Photo: Bob Askester/Milestones Productions Inc./Sony/REX/Shutterstock.

**Of Mice and Men** (1992)
Sad book, sad film. This adaptation of John Steinbeck's novel sees Gary Sinise and John Malkovich as ranch-hands George and Lennie, two men with big dreams and no shortage of hardships.
*Pictured: John Malkovich, Gary Sinise, and Ray Walston*
Photo: MGM/REX/Shutterstock.

**Mask** (1985)
Eric Stolz played Rocky Dennis, whose craniodiaphyseal dysplasia caused cranial enlargements, in this moving biographical film. Cher won a Cannes Film Festival Best Actress award for her performance as Dennis' tough-as-nails mother, who battles depression, drug addiction, and a tumultuous love life.
*Pictured: Sam Elliott and Cher*
Photo: Moviestore Collection/REX/Shutterstock.

**The Curious Case of Benjamin Button** (2008)
No shame if Baby Benjamin made you crumple.
*Pictured: Cate Blanchett and Charles Henry Wyson*
Photo: Moviestore Collection/REX/Shutterstock.

**A Tale of Love and Darkness** (2015)
To call Natalie Portman's directorial feature debut bleak is an understatement. This adaptation of Israeli author Amos Oz's autobiographical novel tackles war, a loveless marriage, and depression against the backdrop of the Arab-Israeli War.
*Pictured: Natalie Portman as Fania*
Photo: Moviestore/REX/Shutterstock.

**The Land Before Time** (1988)
Think of this animated tear-jerker as Bambi for '80s kids. Spoiler: Littlefoot's mom dies and turns into some sort of ghost cloud. Traumatizing.
*Pictured: Littlefoot*
Photo: Moviestore Collection/REX/Shutterstock.

***Regarding Henry*** (1991)
A pre-stardom J.J. Abrams wrote this poignant screenplay about an unscrupulous lawyer who must piece his life back together after suffering brain damage in a shooting. Harrison Ford and Annette Bening star, but look out for Bill Nunn, who died September 24, 2016, in a pivotal supporting role.
*Pictured: Harrison Ford and Bill Nunn*
Photo: SNAP/REX/Shutterstock.

**The Cider House Rules** (1999)
Take a film about an orphanage, pile on subplots about incest, rape, heartbreak, war, and accidental overdoses, and you've got one bleak movie night ahead.
*Pictured: Tobey Maguire as Homer*
Photo: Moviestore Collection/REX/Shutterstock.

**Rabbit Hole** (2010)
Nicole Kidman earned an Academy Award nomination for her role as a mother mourning the sudden death of her young son. The film doesn't shy away from tackling grief in its many forms. Can a person forgive? Is one life worth more than another? How do you move on?
*Pictured: Nicole Kidman and Aaron Eckhart*
Photo: Moviestore Collection/REX/Shutterstock.

**Doubt** (2008)
Stealing the show from Meryl Streep is no small feat, but Viola Davis did just that with her searing portrayal of a mother whose son, Donald, is thought to have been abused by his priest. Donald's story and the cloud over his future really is the emotional center of this powerful morality tale.
*Pictured: Viola Davis as Mrs. Miller*
Photo: Snap Stills/REX/Shutterstock.

**I Am Sam** (2001)
Sean Penn plays a father with a developmental disability who must fight to keep custody of his young daughter in this tearjerker co-starring baby Dakota Fanning.
*Pictured: Sean Penn and Dakota Fanning*
Photo: Moviestore Collection/REX/Shutterstock.

**A River Runs Through It** (1992)
Who knew fly fishing could make us so weepy? This Robert Redford-directed drama about two very different brothers requires hankies.
*Pictured: Craig Sheffer and Brad Pitt*
Photo: Moviestore Collection/REX/Shutterstock.

**Away From Her** (2006)
Julie Christie earned a Best Actress Oscar nomination for her role as a Canadian woman whose Alzheimer's disease changes the dynamics of her picture-perfect marriage.
*Pictured: Julia Christie and Gordon Pinsent*
Photo: Moviestore Collection/Rex/Shutterstock.

***Bright Star***(2009)
Who doesn't love a heart-crushing romance between a sickly poet and his muse? Ben Whishaw and Abbie Cornish play John Keats and his true love Fanny Brawne in this stunning drama directed by Jane Campion.
*Pictured: Cornish and Whishaw*
Photo: Snap Stills/REX/Shutterstock.

***Cinema Paradiso*** (1988)
There are plenty of joyful moments in this Italian film about a young boy's friendship with the local film projectionist. It's the final scene, featuring a grown-up Toto, that'll kick you in the gut.
*Pictured: Philippe Noiret and Salvatore Cascio*
Photo: Moviestore Collection/REX/Shutterstock.

**Glory** (1989)
The film that gave Denzel Washington his first Oscar should be mandatory viewing in classrooms, thanks to its moving portrayal of an African-American regiment fighting for the Union during the Civil War. Morgan Freeman, Matthew Broderick, and Andre Braugher co-star in the war drama.
*Pictured: Denzel Washington and Morgan Freeman*
Photo: Moviestore Collection/REX/Shutterstock.

**Dead Poets Society** (1989)
Assuming that the gory *Saturday Night Live* parody didn't ruin it for you, expect major emotions from this drama about a teacher who changes the lives of his students forever thanks to Walt Whitman.
*Pictured: Robin Williams stars alongside Robert Sean Leonard, Ethan Hawke, and Josh Charles*
Photo:Moviestore Collection/REX/Shutterstock.

**The Hunt** (2012)
Hannibal has feelings, y'all. Mads Mikkelsen stars as a man shut out by his friends and community after being falsely accused of molesting a young girl in this Danish drama. The ensuing witch hunt is upsetting and truly hard to watch.
*Pictured: Mads Mikkelsen*
Photo: Moviestore/Rex/Shutterstock.

**Marley & Me** (2008)
It's like *Old Yeller* for millennials, right down to the snotty ugly-crying. Who'd have thought an Owen Wilson and Jennifer Aniston film could make us feel so many feels?
*Pictured: Owen Wilson and Jennifer Aniston*
Photo: Moviestore/Rex/Shutterstock.

**Mrs. Miniver** (1942)
We know this Oscar-winning classic set during World War II is all about maintaining that British stiff upper lip, but the series of tragedies always turn us into a wobbly mess.
*Pictured: Greer Garson and Walter Pidgeon as the Minivers*
Photo: Snap/Rex/Shutterstock.

**Life as a House** (2001)
Terminal illness, divorce, and a complex father-son relationship: This drama ticks all the tear-inducing boxes. Both Kevin Kline and Hayden Christensen (yes, Anakin himself) were nominated for acting awards for their moving performances.
*Pictured: Kevin Kline, Hayden Christensen, and Kristin Scott Thomas*
Photo: Snap Stills/Rex/Shutterstock.

**Me Before You** (2016)
Like, *puddles*. We won't give away any spoilers, but let's just say that this Emilia Clarke and Sam Claflin romantic drama will make your tear ducts feel like they've been set on fire by Daenerys.
*Pictured: Emilia Clarke and Sam Claflin*
Photo: Warner Bros/Moviestore Collection Ltd/REX/Shutterstock.

***45 Years*** (2015)
More bleak and quietly disheartening than boo-hoo, this British drama earned Charlotte Rampling a Best Actress Oscar nomination earlier this year. It was well deserved, too, with the legendary actress beautifully conveying emotions like romantic disappointment and jealous irritation.
*Pictured: Charlotte Rampling*
Photo: Moviestore Collection/Rex/Shutterstock.

**Jack** (1996)
For the most part, this is a light comedy about a young boy with Werner syndrome, which ages him to the point that he looks like Robin Williams. It's all very bittersweet, though, culminating in a graduation speech that's sure to set off your facial sprinkler system.
*Pictured: Diane Lane and Robin Williams*
Photo: Moviestore Collection/Rex/Shutterstock.

**Project Nim** (2011)
This heart-wrenching documentary follows the story of a chimpanzee raised with a human family before becoming the subject of an extensive research project in the 1970s. Long story short: Nim Chimpsky gets let down by pretty much *everyone*.
*Pictured: Nim Chimpsky with a researcher*
Photo: Moviestore Collection/Rex/Shutterstock.

**Rabbit-Proof Fence** (2002)
Kenneth Branagh plays the baddie in this Australian drama about three mixed-race Aboriginal girls who try to make their way home after being ripped from their families and placed in a settlement camp for "half castes." The film is loosely based on a true story.
*Pictured: Everlyn Sampi and Tianna Sansbury*
Photo: Moviestore Collection/Rex/Shutterstock.

**The Book Thief**(2013)
Based on Markus Zusak's bestselling book of the same name, this story about a book-loving orphan entrusted to a German family in 1938 strings together a series of heartbreaking plot points. Star Sophie Nélisse is a wonder as the lead character Leisel.
*Pictured: Sophie Nélisse*
Photo: Moviestore Collection/Rex/Shutterstock.

**The Danish Girl** (2015)
Eddie Redmayne's Einar Wegener struggles to find love and acceptance as he transitions into a woman, while Alicia Vikander, playing Wegener's wife Gerda, beautifully captures a sense of loss. The train station scene is *brutal*.
*Pictured: Eddie Redmayne*
Photo: Moviestore/Rex/Shutterstock.

**Schindler's List** (1993)
Unless you're Jerry Seinfeld, this Oscar-winning story about heroism during the Holocaust will have you weeping uncontrollably right down to the end credits.
*Pictured: Ralph Fiennes and Liam Neeson*
Photo: Snap/Rex/Shutterstock.

**The Pursuit of Happyness** (2006)
Just keep reminding yourself that this based-on-a-true-story film has a happy ending as you watch Will Smith constantly struggle to support his son (a pre-Louis Vuitton Jaden Smith) and get a pinky toe on the corporate ladder.
Photo: Snap Stills/Rex/Shutterstock.

**Southpaw** (2015)
Consider this a sucker punch to the heartstrings. A surprise twist elevates this 2015 hit from a mere boxing flick to an emotional drama about love, family, and discipline.
*Pictured: Rachel McAdams and Jake Gyllenhaal*
Photo: Rex/Shutterstock.

**The Constant Gardener** (2005)
Beyond the intrigue, this political thriller digs deep into heartbreak, questions of fidelity, and devotion.
*Pictured: Rachel Weisz*
Photo: Moviestore Collection/REX/Shutterstock.

**Frozen River** (2008)
Melissa Leo and the late Misty Upham star in this bleak drama about two women (one a down-and-out single mom, the other a Mohawk bingo parlor employee separated from her son) going to great lengths to make ends meet.
*Pictured: Melissa Leo*
Photo: Moviestore Collection/REX/Shutterstock.

**Still Life** (2013)
Eddie Marsan stars as a government employee tasked with sorting out funerals for deceased citizens who have no loved ones. One final case prompts him to investigate the death of a man who died in squalor. Trust us when we tell you that the ending will hit you like a ton of bricks.
*Pictured: Eddie Marsan*
Photo: Redwave Films/Embargo Films.

**Philadelphia** (1993)
We still can't listen to Neil Young or Bruce Springsteen without welling up, and it's all due to this tearjerker. Tom Hanks won his first Oscar for playing an AIDS-stricken lawyer suing his old firm for discrimination, with Denzel Washington as the "ambulance chaser" leading the charge.
*Pictured: Denzel Washington and Tom Hanks*
Photo: Moviestore/REX Shutterstock.

**Fruitvale Station** (2013)
If you sobbed when Wallace got shot on *The Wire*, this other Michael B. Jordan vehicle will no doubt have you in the fetal position for days. Even more heartbreaking is the fact that the events in the Ryan Coogler-directed drama actually happened.
*Pictured: Michael B. Jordan*
Photo: Snap Stills/REX Shutterstock.

**All Is Lost** (2013)
What this Robert Redford drama lacks in dialogue, it compensates with edge-of-your-seat drama and an overwhelming sense of weariness and frustration. Will Redford save his broken boat? Maybe. Will you ever go sailing again? Probably not.
*Pictured: Robert Redford*
Photo: Moviestore/REX Shutterstock.

**About Time** (2013)
On its face, this is a rom-com with a time-traveling twist. Perhaps that's why the built-in life lessons and a plot about terminal illness hit us like a ton of bricks.
*Pictured: Domhnall Gleeson and Bill Nighy*
Photo: Moviestore/REX Shutterstock.

**Still Alice** (2014)
Julianne Moore earned her Best Actress Oscar for playing an active and intelligent 50-year-old woman diagnosed with Alzheimer's. Her struggle is heartbreaking, from having to tell her grown children that the disease is genetic, to making a list of questions she must answer every day to keep her memory sharp.
*Pictured: Julianne Moore*
Photo: Moviestore/REX Shutterstock.

**My Girl** (1991)
Although the 1991 coming-of-age film is billed as a comedy-drama, director Howard Zieff certainly pulled out all the stops when young Vada Sultenfuss (played by newcomer Anna Chlumsky) had to deal with the tragic loss of her friend (Macaulay Culkin) while growing up in her father's funeral home in the '70s.
*Pictured: Macaulay Culkin and Anna Chlumsky*
Photo: Courtesy of Columbia Pictures.

**The Elephant Man** (1980)
David Lynch's 1980 biopic of Victorian freak-show exhibit John Merrick, a man suffering from severe elephantiasis, is a stark indictment of the inhumanity and moral exclusion people routinely inflict on others.
*Pictured: John Hurt*
Photo: Courtesy of Paramount Pictures.

**Blue Valentine** (2010)
Michelle Williams certainly earned her Oscar nomination in this 2010 film documenting the gut-wrenching dissolution of her character's marriage to a violent alcoholic played by Ryan Gosling.
*Pictured: Michelle Williams and Ryan Gosling*
Photo: Courtesy of The Weinstein Company.

**Steel Magnolias** (1989)
Few movies portray the bonds of female friendship quite like this 1989 ensemble dramedy, adapted from the eponymous Robert Harling play. The film — which features a magnificent cast, including Sally Field, Shirley MacLaine, and Dolly Parton — tells the story of how a tight-knit group of Southern women support each other through the various peaks and valleys of their lives. Some of the saddest moments are watching Sally Fields' grief as her daughter, a pre- *Pretty Woman* Julia Roberts, dies of complications from diabetes. Talk about an emotional gut punch.
*Pictured: Olympia Dukakis, Sally Field, Julia Roberts, Daryl Hannah, and Dolly Parton*
Photo: Courtesy of TriStar Pictures.

**P.S. I Love You** (2007)
This movie is explicitly designed to turn on the waterworks. It's the story of a young widow (Hilary Swank) who receives posthumous letters of encouragement from her late husband (Gerard Butler) after he dies of a brain tumor.
*Pictured: Gerard Butler and Hilary Swank*
Photo: Courtesy of Warner Bros. Pictures.

**My Life** (1993)
This under-appreciated 1993 gem features Michael Keaton as a high-powered PR executive and expectant father who is diagnosed with terminal cancer. Fearing that he will not live long enough to see the birth of his son, Keaton records a video documentary of himself so that his child can get to know him.
*Pictured: Nicole Kidman and Michael Keaton*
Photo: Courtesy of Columbia Pictures.

**Magnolia** (1999)
Paul Thomas Anderson's 1999 drama features an interconnected group of characters in L.A, who are forced to grapple with forgiveness, desperation, and the search for happiness when their lives intersect around the death of a terminally ill quiz-show producer played by Jason Robards. The scene where Tom Cruise's pick-up artist character breaks down by the death bed of his estranged father is one of the great emotionally affecting scenes (and Cruise won his third Golden Globe for the role).
*Pictured: A theatrical poster for* Magnolia
Photo: Courtesy of New Line Cinema.

**Atonement** (2007)
The iconic Vanessa Redgrave delivers a somber and arresting performance as a novelist who used fiction to atone for the young lovers whose lives she ruined when she mistakenly accused a man (James McAvoy) of a sex crime at the onset of World War II. Adapted from the 2001 Ian McEwan novel, the film deals with decades' worth of grief as a result of a youthful flight of fancy that contributed to the premature death of her sister (Keira Knightley) and the false imprisonment of her sister's lover.
*Pictured: James McAvoy and Keira Knightley.*
Photo: Courtesy of Universal Pictures.

**Beaches** (1988)
It is absolutely impossible not to cry during this 1988 drama where the deeply complicated 30-year-friendship between a brash actress (Bette Midler) and a privileged lawyer (Barbara Hershey) is brought to an abrupt end when the latter is diagnosed with a rare heart disease. The opening bars of Midler's performance of "The Wind Beneath My Wings" are usually all it takes to open the floodgates.
*Pictured: Barbara Hershey and Bette Midler*
Photo: Courtesy of Buena Vista Pictures.

**Million Dollar Baby** (2004)
Hilary Swank is a bit of a staple in the tearjerker genre. This time around she's a scrappy boxer who eventually develops a bond with her hard-nosed boxing coach, played by Clint Eastwood (who also directed the film). The movie has all the makings of your typical sports drama with a triumphant underdog — until it delivers an emotional sucker punch at the end.
*Pictured: Hilary Swank*
Photo: Courtesy of Warner Bros. Pictures.

Up (2009)
We have to hand it to this 2009 Pixar offering for completely reinventing the formula we've come to know and expect from sad movies. While most tearjerkers save the most gut-wrenching developments for the third act, this beloved animated feature has both kids and adults reaching for the Kleenex within the first 10 minutes.
*Pictured: A scene from* Up
Photo: Courtesy of Walt Disney Studios Motion Pictures.

**The Fault in Our Stars** (2014)
As this 2014 romantic dramedy proves, the only thing more tragic than a fresh-faced teenager with terminal cancer is a fresh-faced teenager with terminal cancer in love. This film though? Doubles down: It features two terminally ill teens in love, played by Shailene Woodley and Ansel Elgort.
*Pictured: Ansel Elgort and Shailene Woodley*
Photo: Courtesy of 20th Century Fox.

**Life Is Beautiful** (1997)
The Italian film's director and star Roberto Benigni took home the Academy Award for Best Actor for his performance of a father trying to distract his son from the horrors of life in a Nazi concentration camp.
*Pictured: Roberto Benigni with Nicoletta Braschi and Giorgio Cantarini*
Photo: Courtesy of Miramax Films.

**Boys Don't Cry** (1999)
Hilary Swank makes yet another appearance on the list in this indie biopic of Brandon Teena, a trans man whose blossoming romance with a karaoke singer (Chloë Sevigny) was cut short after he was brutally murdered in small-town Nebraska. The movie is not only heartbreaking because of it's ill-fated love story, but also because it illustrates the bigotry and threats that many trans people have historically endured and continue to face.
*Pictured: Chloë Sevigny and Hilary Swank*
Photo: Courtesy of Fox Searchlight Pictures.

**Dear Zachary: A Letter to a Son About His Father** (2008)
*Dear Zachary* is a unique entry on this list because it's a documentary. The 2008 film starts off as a video diary to the infant Zachary from friends and family giving testimonials about the murdered father he'll never meet. Events take an unexpected, true-crime turn however, and tragedy further compounds itself by the film's end.
*Pictured: Zachary with his grandparents*
Photo: Courtesy of Oscilloscope Laboratories.

**Dancer in the Dark** (2000)
Leave it to Lars von Trier to make arguably the most depressing musical ever filmed. Things start out pretty bleak, with Björk starring as an impoverished factory worker who is pinching pennies to pay for an operation that will save her son from the same genetic, degenerative eye disease that is causing her to go blind. If that doesn't sound upsetting enough, things only go downhill from there.
*Pictured: Björk*
Photo: Courtesy of Fine Line Features.

**Sophie's Choice** (1982)
Thanks to this critically lauded 1982 drama, the term "Sophie's Choice" has entered the lexicon to stand for any scenario where one must make an impossible decision. In this case, Meryl Streep's Sophie was forced to choose which of her two young children would be sent to the gas chamber when the family was imprisoned in Auschwitz. Streep brought home an Oscar for her performance, and the film as a whole pretty much set the gold standard for tearjerkers.
*Pictured: Meryl Streep*
Photo: Courtesy of Universal Pictures.

**12 Years a Slave**(2014)
One could argue that the saddest movies on the list are the ones depict the inhumanity of people or institutions in power. Steve McQueen's 2014 Best Picture winner is not only heartbreaking because it depicts the plight of one man sold into slavery, but because it depicts the cruelty that was once an accepted as status quo.
*Pictured: Chiwetel Ejiofor*
Photo: Courtesy of Fox Searchlight Pictures

**Bicycle Thieves** (1948)
Vittorio De Sica's 1948 Italian neorealist film is widely lauded as one of the best movies ever made. A young father is desperate to feed his impoverished family, so he scrapes together the money to buy the bicycle necessary for his new job hanging advertisements around the city. As luck would have it, his bike gets stolen on his first day on the job. With his young son in tow, the man sets out on a near impossible mission to get it back.
*Pictured: Enzo Staiola and Lamberto Maggiorani*
Photo: Courtesy of Umbrella Entertainment.

**Amour** (2012)
Austrian filmmaker Michael Haneke isn't known for making particularly uplifting films, and 2012's *Amour* is no exception. This Academy Award winner for Best Foreign Film takes a profoundly sad and somber look at how an elderly Parisian couple fares when one half slips into dementia after a series of strokes.
*Pictured: Emmanuelle Riva*
Photo: Courtesy of Sony Pictures Classics.

**Terms of Endearment** (1983)
No list of sad movies is complete without this 1983 dramedy. Shirley MacLaine's performance, particularly the part where she's dealing with the loss of her daughter, is the barometer against which all other sad-movie performances must be measured.
*Pictured: Shirley MacLaine and Debra Winger*
Photo: Courtesy of Paramount Pictures.

**The Boy in the Striped Pajamas** (2008)
If *Sophie's Choice* and *Life Is Beautiful* taught us anything, the surefire formula for a devastating tearjerker combines the Holocaust with child mortality, and *The Boy in the Striped Pajamas* has both. Nine-year-old Bruno's family relocates near a concentration camp when his father, an SS officer, is given a promotion. Little Bruno sneaks off and befriends a prisoner his age near the edge of the camp, where they play checkers through the barbed wire. Although the two boys become great friends, little Bruno learns some hard truths about what his father does for a living, and why his new friend wears what he mistakenly assumes are pajamas.
*Pictured: Jack Scanlon.*
Photo: Courtesy of Walt Disney Studios Motion Pictures.

**The Road** (2009)
In this adaptation of the Cormac McCarthy novel of the same name, this film's grim, post-apocalyptic vision makes the dystopia of *The Hunger Games* look downright desirable. The unnamed father and son duo do their best to keep hope alive in a bleak world where roving bands have turned to cannibalism in the bleak hellscape left over from an unspecified disaster.
*Pictured: Viggo Mortensen and Kodi Smit-McPhee*
Photo: Courtesy of The Weinstein Company.

**The Day of the Locust**(1975)
John Schlesinger's 1975 adaptation of the Nathanael West novel of the same name is a grim look at Hollywood in the '30s, particularly at a group of broken has-beens and never-were who failed to make their show business dreams come true.
*Pictured: A scene from* The Day of the Locust
Photo: Courtesy of Paramount Pictures.

**The Notebook** (2004)
Sure, we all like to think of 2004's *The Notebook* as an enduring love story first and foremost, especially given the fantastic circumstances leading up to Rachel McAdams and Ryan Gosling's sexy, rain-soaked kiss. However, we have to hand it to James Garner and Gena Rowlands for effectively reducing us all to tears at the end.
*Pictured: Rachel McAdams and Ryan Gosling*
Photo: Courtesy of New Line Cinema.

**Brokeback Mountain** (2005)
This heartbreaking love story of the 20-year affair between two ranch hands, played by Jake Gyllenhaal and the late Heath Ledger, was easily the most talked-about movie of 2005. Ledger and Gyllenhaal began an affair on a job site on the movie's titular mountain, before being fired by the summer's end. The pair continue with a shaky and sporadic relationship, despite their attempts to marry women and live lifestyles that society deemed more acceptable in the '60s to the '80s.
*Pictured: Jake Gyllenhaal and Heath Ledger*
Photo: Courtesy of Focus Features.

**Stepmom** (1998)
Susan Sarandon and Julia Roberts play the respective ex-wife and fiancée to Ed Harris. The tension between the two is heightened when Sarandon passive aggressively uses her children as pawns in her quiet war with her ex. However, the women are forced to make peace when Sarandon is diagnosed with terminal cancer and they realize the family dynamics really will change forever.
*Pictured: Susan Sarandon and Julia Roberts*
Photo: Courtesy of Columbia Pictures.

**Precious** (2009)
This is easily one of the hardest movies on the list to watch. The 2009 Lee Daniels film tells the story of Claireece Precious Jones (Gabourey Sidibe), an illiterate, pregnant 16-year-old who regularly escapes into her own fantasy world when faced with emotional, physical, and sexual abuse from her family. Despite being in the eighth grade at 16, Precious is tasked with getting her GED and ultimately changing her life's direction so that she can escape her abusive home and provide for her children.
*Pictured: Gabourey Sidibe*
Photo: Courtesy of Lionsgate.

**The Champ** (1979)
Franco Zeffirelli's 1979 remake of the 1931 film of the same name features a young Ricky Schroder in his film debut. The movie details the dysfunctional relationship between young T.J (Schroder) and his dad (Jon Voight), a former boxer turned alcoholic horse trainer with a gambling problem. However, things get more complicated as T.J.'s estranged mother (Faye Dunaway) comes back into the picture. Despite being just 9 years old, Schroder gives an incredibly impressive onscreen cry. In turn, it will definitely get your waterworks going.
*Pictured: Ricky Schroder and Jon Voight*
Photo: Courtesy of United Artists.

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Fans Of The Simpsons Will Love This New Beauty Collection

April 27, 2017, 11:15 am

≫ Next: Disney Star Michael Mantenuto Found Dead At 35

≪ Previous: Heartbreaking Movies You Should Never Watch Alone

1989 may be the birth year (and album title) of one Taylor Swift, but there was another cultural icon born then: The Simpsons. The long-running animated TV series has dominated cable networks for decades, pumping out more than a whopping 600 (!) episodes. But the only thing longer than the show's IMBD page is the list of hardcore fans clamoring to get their hands on any item with a picture of Marge slapped on the front — beauty products included.

Surprisingly, though, there haven't been many on the market since MAC dropped a Simpsons -inspired collection in 2014. Until now: The Face Shop, that Korean beauty brand behind all those Disney sheet masks, is introducing yet another novelty line. Only this time, its skin-care goodies pay homage (Homer-age?) to the whole gang of main characters — Bart, Marge, Lisa, Homer, and Maggie — with a slew of products that range from sunscreen sticks and creams to face masks and oils. It's basically every summer essential you could ever need, all wrapped up in one yellow tiny package.

- ※더페이스샵X심슨 콜라보 집중탐구※ 똑부러지는 #리사 의 위시리스트 공개!

A post shared by THEFACESHOP 공식 인스타그램 (@thefaceshop.official) on Apr 27, 2017 at 12:31am PDT

Unfortunately, unlike the TV show that's syndicated pretty much everywhere, you can't expect to find these products as easily. In fact, they are only being sold officially in Korea (d'oh!), although you can scoop 'em up on select eBay and Amazon shops, at your own risk. Given the fact that the going rate for each item is less than 20 bucks, the risk might save you a hell of a lot of dough on a plane ticket. Then again, if The Simpsons taught us anything, it's that good things happen when you follow your gut.

- ※더페이스샵X심슨 콜라보 집중탐구※ 도넛도 물리친 #호머 의 더페 사랑🍩

A post shared by THEFACESHOP 공식 인스타그램 (@thefaceshop.official) on Apr 27, 2017 at 12:26am PDT

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Disney Star Michael Mantenuto Found Dead At 35

April 27, 2017, 11:20 am

≫ Next: May I Interest You In Watching Jason Momoa Eat A Muffin?

≪ Previous: Fans Of The Simpsons Will Love This New Beauty Collection

Actor Michael Mantenuto, who played Jack O'Callahan in 2004's Miracle, has died at age 35.

The Des Moines Police Department in Washington state found Mantenuto dead in his car on Monday afternoon, ABC's WCVB reports. Mantenuto's passing was apparently a death by suicide, as he suffered a self-inflicted gunshot wound, according to The Hollywood Reporter.

Miracle was Mantenuto's breakout role. Before starring in the movie, Mantenuto played college hockey at the University of Maine. The role was a perfect fit for him — in addition to his hockey background, Mantenuto majored in theater.

Miracle told the story of the 1980 U.S. Olympic hockey team and its surprising victory over the Soviet Union's hockey team. Mantenuto played O'Callahan, a defenseman on the team. Kurt Russell also starred in Miracle, playing coach Herb Brooks. O'Callahan himself spoke highly of Mantenuto's portrayal of him, telling Irish America in 2007 that "all the actors did great, and they were really into it."

After Miracle, Mantenuto acted in 2006's Dirtbags and 2008's Surfer, Dude. He went on to join the Army after leaving acting behind.

"Those of you that knew Mike will remember him for his passionate love for his family and his commitment to the health of the force," read a press release from Col. Guillaume Beaurpere, who commanded the U.S. Army's First Special Forces Group unit to which Mantenuto belonged. Beaurpere was the one to announce Mantenuto's death. The press release was published on the unit's Facebook page on Wednesday.

Mantenuto is survived by his wife, his daughter, and his son, in addition to his father and his three sisters, according to the New York Daily News.

If you are thinking about suicide, please call theNational Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255) or the Suicide Crisis Line at 1-800-784-2433.

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May I Interest You In Watching Jason Momoa Eat A Muffin?

April 27, 2017, 11:30 am

≫ Next: Why Where You Sit On A Plane Could Save Your Life

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There are a few things I look for when I watch a movie trailer. It has to make me laugh, even if just a little bit. Conversely, if it's a more serious film, then it has to make me consider the idea that I might cry. It also has to have a good song in the background. A little action (maybe a nice explosion) would be nice, too. And it must, MUST, feature a celebrity that I feel is worthy of my time and analysis.

These are pretty basic requirements for me to enjoy to a film, and I urge you to have a list of your own. I also recently added another item to the mental check-list I make when considering watching a new film based on its trailer: it must include Jason Momoa doing something domestic.

This first happened in Bad Batch, a movie that you definitely haven't heard of, but whose trailer I implore you to check out. In it, Momoa — a muscular and threatening looking gangster-like figure — dons a pair of glasses and an easel and starts painting. It's perfect juxtaposition between a burly man and a delicate action. Now, in Once Upon A Time In Venice, his new action-comedy with Bruce Willis, he's doing it again, but this time he's eating a muffin while wearing a wife-beater, bandana and surrounded by his gun-toting goons.

There's something magical about seeing Momoa gingerly holding a homemade muffin. Here — allow me to prove it...

Now that he's painted, eaten (and potentially baked) muffins, I would like to see him fold laundry and assemble Ikea furniture in his next two films.

Now, here's the trailer for the movie (it's about Willis' dog being stolen by Momoa, but I bet the dog would have a pretty nice life with Momoa as his owner TBH).

While I can't really explain why the Momoa muffin scene is so great, I can promise that it is going to be the best part of this film, which comes out June 16.

And finally, who could watch a video with a muffin in it and NOT think of this?

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Why Where You Sit On A Plane Could Save Your Life

April 27, 2017, 11:40 am

≫ Next: Men Were Angry Lena Dunham Was Confident In Her Own Naked Skin

≪ Previous: May I Interest You In Watching Jason Momoa Eat A Muffin?

Despite the fact that flying continues to be the safest form of transportation in the country, it's also the most anxiety-inducing one. If you sit there clutching your complimentary beverage every time there's a bit of turbulence, you are not alone.

A crash is unlikely. According to statistics from the Netherlands-based Aviation Safety Network (ASN), 2016 was the second safest year to fly on record. The ASN found that in 2016, there were 19 fatal airliner accidents and 325 deaths worldwide, nothing that this translates to a one-in-3.2 million chance of being involved in a crash. For the seventh straight year, zero people died from plane crashes on U.S.-certificated scheduled airlines worldwide in 2016.

But we still want to be extra safe when we fly. That's why a couple of publications have analyzed plane-crash data to determine whether where you sit during your flight matters. After all, if you can take your safety into your own hands — at least to a degree — why wouldn't you?

HuffPost recently looked at data collected and analyzed by Popular Mechanics and Time, which both concluded the following: Sitting in the back is where it's at. In 2007, Popular Mechanics analyzed National Transportation Safety Board data and found that the front 15% of seats have a 49% survival rate, seats over the wing have a 56% rate, and those in the rear — behind the wing — have a 69% rate.

Time magazine, in 2015, did its own analysis, looking at Federal Aviation Administration data, and also found that seats in the back have a lower fatality rate — at 32%, compared with those over the wing (39%) and in the front (38%). The middle third of the cabin was determined as the least safe, with a 44% fatality rate.

Of course, your safety depends on the specific circumstances of a crash. "Each incident or crash is unique," FAA spokesperson Alison Duquette told HuffPost. "There is no safest seat." Still, it's good to have as much information as possible about our risks.

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Men Were Angry Lena Dunham Was Confident In Her Own Naked Skin

April 27, 2017, 11:45 am

≫ Next: How A Year Abroad Wrecked Me Financially

≪ Previous: Why Where You Sit On A Plane Could Save Your Life

People always want to know Lena Dunham's secret to being comfortable in her own skin. "You're so brave! Where do you get your confidence?" they'd say, not realizing that it's inherently rude to marvel at someone's confidence; while meant as a compliment, it implies that the person shouldn't have confidence in their appearance. And Lena Dunham, whose body became a hot topic of conversation every time she appeared nude on Girls, is one woman who never really knew how to answer that question.

The Girls star and her co-creator Jenni Konner addressed the issue in retrospect during a discussion about the just-ended series with America Ferrera at the Tribeca Film Festival in New York this week. "In the third season, a reporter from The Wrap raised his hand at [a press conference] and asked ‘Why do you show your body so much?’ And I had a rage spiral," Dunham said, as reported by The Huffington Post. People were either confused or mad about Dunham's self-confidence in doing nude scenes. “Men, generally, were very angry that she felt comfortable showing her body,” Konner explained.

But Dunham herself has always been at peace with her body. “I think people were so ready to believe that I was, like, jumping past some massive hurdle in order to get naked on television. [But] that’s not where my fear lies. If that’s what scared me, I wouldn’t do it every week.” She added, “I’ve always been like Rihanna to myself. Like, I just have a great time with my own body,” the actress explained.

What a fantastic life philosophy: worship yourself the way your worship Rihanna. How have we never thought of this? Here's another tip: love and accept your body the way Lena does.

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How A Year Abroad Wrecked Me Financially

April 27, 2017, 11:50 am

≫ Next: The Sad, Unexpected Lesson In Whitney: Can I Be Me

≪ Previous: Men Were Angry Lena Dunham Was Confident In Her Own Naked Skin

I hit one of the lowest points of my life last August. I was back home in Canada after a year living abroad left me broke. I remember sitting on the floor of my pantry, taking stock of my food inventory: two oranges, a can of tomato soup, a loaf of moldy bread, and a box of macaroni. It wasn’t even my pantry; I had been house-sitting for two months. I wasn’t paying rent, and yet I still couldn’t afford to buy groceries. But somehow, I had to make this paltry amount of food stretch for several days. At this point, I had almost no income.

I had been a freelance writer for seven years, so I knew how to live on little. Freedom had always been more important to me than security, so I never made making money a priority. And that worked well for me — that is, until I moved abroad.

When I first left Canada for Berlin, I had minimal debt — small amounts spread across two credit cards, plus my student loans. Those things seemed manageable at the time, though, and I had been handling my payments for years.

But it turned out I was completely unprepared for all the unexpected costs of relocating. I had saved $2,000 (the amount required for my Youth Mobility visa application) for my move to Berlin, but I hadn’t expected the amounts I’d need to shell out before I even left Canada. For one thing, despite a revolving door of roommates over four years, I had to pay the entire damage deposit on my apartment myself. Plus, I had thought that my lease was up at the end of July, but it was actually the end of August; there went another month of rent. Those two bills set me back thousands.

Freedom had always been more important to me than security, so I never made making money a priority.

Then, just before I left Canada, I had an abnormal pap smear. My doctor told me I’d need a colposcopy — an invasive procedure to test for precancerous cells. So, once I finally got to Berlin, I found a private clinic with an English-speaking doctor who would perform the procedure. Of course my insurance wouldn’t cover it; I had to foot the entire bill. There went another $1,000.

I did not have an emergency fund in place, and my savings could only cover so much. I thought I could easily find a job in Berlin with my working holiday visa, but to my naive surprise, not too many places wanted to hire someone who didn’t speak a word of German.

Berlin is an incredibly cheap city by North American standards. My monthly rent for a beautiful, spacious room in trendy Prenzlauer Berg was just 400 EUR — about 420 USD. But the Canadian dollar had dropped so far, I was forking out close to $700 a month.

Still, I didn’t adjust my lifestyle. In fact, I treated my year abroad like it was my last year on the planet. I went sailing in Croatia, visited friends in Ireland, traveled around Italy for three weeks, and walked the Camino de Santiago in Spain. I partied at notorious Berlin nightclubs and gorged myself on ethnic foods that were unavailable in my part of Canada. I won’t lie: It was the best year of my life. But almost everything I bought went on my Mastercard, and oh boy, it did not take long to max that Mastercard out.

This was one very fundamental lesson I learned abroad: Europeans rarely even own a credit card. My German friends thought it was downright weird that I had two.

I don’t regret my time in Berlin. Living abroad endowed me with a confidence I never expected. I remember climbing the four flights of stairs to my little apartment and thinking, I can make a life for myself anywhere. I can arrive in a city not knowing anyone, and I can make wonderful new friends and learn a new language and become familiar with a city 30 times bigger than my hometown. Still, I had no choice but to return to Canada once my visa expired — I was broke beyond belief.

Europeans rarely even own a credit card. My German friends thought it was downright weird that I had two.

Back in Canada, I called my father one evening to discuss my going back to the 9-5 work life. I whined about how hard I had worked for seven years to set up a lifestyle of freedom — how all I wanted to do was travel. My patient, ever-loving, generous father was exasperated with me for the first time in my life.

“Candice, when I was 12 years old, I worked for hours at a sawmill every day after school so I could buy a green bicycle,” he told me. “I was so damned proud of that bicycle, but I worked my ass off to get it.” Point taken, Dad. Quit whining, and get to work.

So I did. I picked up a role as a communications officer at a local film festival, and I loved it. I didn’t dread getting out of bed every morning, and I could afford groceries. My paycheck arrived on time. I was treated with respect and dignity.

A year ago, I never imagined I’d be living back in my old town, working a desk job. But in a weird twist of fate, I’ve found myself falling for my home city all over again; I’ve made new friends, I’m more active in the community, and I have more time to devote to writing that I care about. I don’t have the stress I once felt about just making it through the month.

For me, it’s important to know that I can live a little while still paying down my debt. I can enjoy a meal out with friends; I can treat myself to a new dress. I meticulously track every expenditure in a spreadsheet, I've plumped up my savings so that I’ll never have to go hungry again, and I’ve set up a separate account for future travel savings. I’m slowly chipping away at my debt — and I’ve already destroyed one of those credit cards.

I’ve still got a long ways to go, but I’ve already paid off thousands of dollars. And yes, I do still ache for those wide Berlin sidewalks and days lounging in Volkspark Friedrichshain. Then there’s the additional ache — the yearning for a new adventure, in a place where winter doesn’t even exist.

Sometimes the end goal is the inspiration. And for me, that means in a few years I’ll be gallivanting around Southeast Asia — I’m absolutely sure of it.

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The Sad, Unexpected Lesson In Whitney: Can I Be Me

April 27, 2017, 11:55 am

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≪ Previous: How A Year Abroad Wrecked Me Financially

Because she was a celebrity, it’s very easy to reduce Whitney Houston into the tropes that have been fortified by media coverage about her. Five years after her untimely death, Houston is often remembered either as a vilified drug addict, or one of the greatest Black female singers of our time who was victimized by drugs and those around her. But Houston was human. And her life was guided by the same things that rule all of our lives: her morals, values, and a web of personal relationships. Houston was a wife, a mother, a sister, a daughter, and a best friend. According to a new Showtime Documentary Films project about the late star, her willingness — and sometimes unwillingness — to take on these roles played a huge part in both her life, and her death.

Nick Broomfield and Rudi Dolezal directed the documentary Whitney: Can I Be Me, which debuted at the Tribeca Film Festival on Tuesday evening. Dolezal worked with Houston for over a decade, documenting her life as a rising pop star. Together, Dolezal and Broomfield compiled archival footage — some of which has never been seen — and filmed interviews with former colleagues and friends of the late singer. The final product is a behind-the-scenes look at the rise and fall of a pop culture icon. But more importantly, it is an intimate glimpse into how personal relationships with those around her fueled Houston's highs and lows.

For those of us who are too young to have appreciated Houston’s golden era, we're most familiar with her tumultuous marriage to R & B singer Bobby Brown. Prior to their 2007 divorce, Houston and Brown — with their daughter Bobbi Kristina — represented the nuclear unit that so many of us have been taught is the only right way to have a family. Many people — especially women — are taught that building the relationships that lead to such an arrangement should be our top priority. (See: this speech on feminism from Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie.) Whitney Houston was no exception.

Before she and Brown were officially a thing, rumors swirled that Houston was wrapped up in an intimate affair with her childhood best friend, Robyn. As is often the case with high-profile single women who keep close female friends around — Oprah and Gayle have side-eyed by the public, and even Rihanna and her bestie Melissa Forde have been the topic of lesbian rumors — Houston’s friendship with Crawford raised suspicions about the singer’s sexuality. LGBTQ visibility and acceptance were not what they are today. A lesbian affair threatened the singer’s image. Even Houston’s mother, who is staunchly religious, wanted Crawford out of Houston’s life. And when Houston and Brown finally married, fights between him and Crawford were a regular part of the group’s life on the road. Apparently, Brown was jealous that Houston could love someone, even platonically, as much as she loved him.

While Whitney: Can I Be Me alludes that a romantic relationship between Houston and Crawford may have existed, they stress that Crawford was one of the most important people in her life. She was committed to Houston getting help for her addiction and taking care of her body. When I asked Dolezal what he thought of their relationship, he told me that “Robyn was probably the only person I met who completely understood Whitney and what she was about.” He said “Whitney trusted Robyn 100%” and that “she was her confidante.” He also knew how hard it was for Robyn to part ways with her friend when tension with Brown got to be too much. “Robyn did a great job in stepping back,” Dolezal insists, even though he knew what it would mean for her famous friend. When Robyn told him about her departure, he knew that it was going to be “very hard” for Houston.

Friendship is one of the very strong guiding principles in my life. I don’t want to imagine where I would be without the bond that my best friend and I share. That a culture of fragile masculinity and homophobia took that away from Houston is heartbreaking. One of the strongest lessons I took from Houston’s story is to never doubt the power of female friendship.

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