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How Do We Reconcile Loving Terrible People on TV?

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Photo: The CW

The term "bad boy" no longer exclusively describes a James Dean-type in a leather jacket. Television's bad boys are hardly a cookie-cutter bunch: they can be wealthy or "wrong-side-of-the-tracks," gay or straight, wearing exclusively bow-ties or basketball jerseys. Today, there are two things that make a bad boy: he must be troubled, and fans must adore him despite this.

Here's the problem with the bad boy trope: it means that TV fans often end up caring deeply about characters who have done unforgivable things.

Redemption stories are the stuff TV is made of but, lately, I've wondered whether TV expects us to love people that might not deserve forgiveness for their awful behavior. A bad boy's arc might end in shaking the bad out of their system, but how can we reconcile rooting for a person who has shown us the very worst? Would we have as much empathy if we met this person in real life?

The first person to come to mind when I think of a beloved, awful human being is Gossip Girl 's own Chuck Bass (Ed Westwick). When we first meet Chuck, he is a teenage billionaire playboy, one who treats women like conquests and discards of them when he gets what he wants. He's charming, slick, and has buckets of daddy issues that the show uses to explain away most of his behavior. Chuck does go on to become a "better man," one who crawls out of his father's looming shadow and thaws his own frozen heart, but it's hard to forget that, in the very first episode of Gossip Girl, Chuck commits two heinous acts.

In the pilot episode alone, Chuck takes a drunk Serena (Blake Lively) into the kitchen of a hotel and kisses her forcibly, despite her protests. She kicks him and runs out. Chuck later takes Jenny (Taylor Momsen), a freshman at his school, up to the roof to "talk" during a party, even after Jenny tells him she has no interest in hooking up. Chuck then forces himself on Jenny, and continues to grope her even after she tells him — over and over again — to stop. Eventually, Jenny's brother Dan (Penn Badgely) stops Chuck — because Jenny's cries certainly didn't.

TV fans often end up caring deeply about characters who have done unforgivable things.

Chuck is considered scum for a few episodes... until he becomes leading lady Blair's endgame boyfriend in episode 7. It becomes clear that Chuck's affection for Blair is supposed to make up for the actions he committed in the pilot. This is the narrative that fans are supposed to buy into: that Chuck has some darkness, sure, but he needs saving, not punishment for his crimes.

Throughout the course of the series, Chuck does many terrible things — he famously pimps Blair out to his uncle in exchange for a hotel, to name his most diabolical — but we're always supposed to root for his redemption. We're supposed to care about the reasons for his bad behavior — his terrible dad, his absent mother, his affluenza — no matter who he hurts along the way. In fact, when Jenny confronts him about the assault in season 2 of the series, the moment is jarring. Fans may remember the pilot well, but the implications — that Chuck sexually assaulted Jenny in the first place — seemed like one that the show wanted to forget. Even Chuck's apology for his "actions" that night isn't a reminder of the person he was — only that he's trying to be better.

Television isn't life, and it's nearly impossible to hold characters up to the same standards we would real people. We can take delight in Cersei Lannister's trickery but know that we'd never want her running for office. We can root for Walter White to evade prison while still acknowledging that he's a deplorable person. However, the line becomes blurry when people who have done terrible things are slated as the heroes of our story — when the show forgives them for actions without punishing them or even allowing them time to reflect. Do we "get over" these actions because they live in television land and demand a certain suspension of disbelief, or do we hold these characters accountable?

In more specific terms: is it okay to love Chuck, to cheer when he gets the girl and beats his enemies, despite the fact that Gossip Girl introduced him as a predator?

Maybe what's most important is feeling this cognitive dissonance in the first place. We can enjoy the journey of the worst of the worst, but the next time a series tries to turn a blind eye to their most deplorable actions, perhaps we shouldn't be so easily distracted.

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Minimalist Engagement Rings That Scream "I Do"

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In a marketplace full of bold trends and a competition for Kim Kardashian -scale rocks, it's no surprise that minimalism has stuck around. Sure, statement necklaces and cocktail rings will always have their moment to shine, but it's easier to create a daily look with a few pieces that match everything. And, with so many burgeoning jewelry designers creating beautiful simple styles, minimalist jewelry is evolving beyond just stacking rings and lariat necklaces.

The same pared-back aesthetic can filter down to your engagement ring, too. Choosing one that coordinates with your overall style can be a breath of fresh air. And since you'll be flashing this piece around on the daily for the foreseeable future, having it fit in step with your personal style is key. Ahead, we've rounded up a few options you can definitely say "yes!" to — even on your most minimal of days.

Sarah & Sebastian Small Oblong Ring, $480, available at Sarah & Sebastian.

Jennifer Dawes Design Stacking Baguette Diamond Ring, $3,575, available at Jennifer Dawes Design.

Crown Nine The Morning Glory Band, $2,100, available at Crown Nine.

Tara Sugden Horizontal Diamond Marquis Solitaire, $3,450, available at Tara Sugden.

Catbird Leda the Swan, $3,400, available at Catbird.

Nora Kogan Paloma Ring, $2,400, available at Nora Kogan.

MinimalVS Black Diamond Wedding Set, $1,195, available at Etsy.

Jennie Kwon Designs White Semi Pave Ring, $490, available at Jennie Kwon Designs.

Morphē Jewelry Clara's Dream Ring, $1,250, available at Morphē Jewelry.

Rachel Boston Jera Ring, $850, available at Rachel Boston.

Katie Diamond Valentina Ring, $1,012, available at Katie Diamond.

MinimalVS Two Diamond Ring, $1,350, available at Etsy.

Erica Weiner Atomic Ring, $1,650, available at Erica Weiner.

Artemer Trillion Diamond Engagement Ring, $3,200, available at Etsy.

Maniamania Opal Entity Solitaire Ring, $1,800, available at Stone & Strand.

Tilda Biehn Diamond Comet Ring, $1,910, available at Tilda Biehn.

Anna Sheffield Eleonore 'Evol' Ring, $800, available at Anna Sheffield.

Wwake Sloped Arc Rose Cut Diamond Ring, $1,191, available at Wwake.

Zoe Chicco Single Baguette Diamond Ring, $330, available at Stone & Strand.

Polly Wales Tapered Baguette Diamond Halo Ring, $4498, available at White Bird.

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Paris Jackson Smooching Her Boyfriend In Paris Is Goals

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Paris Jackson is currently in her city — Paris, France.

The 18-year-old daughter of Michael Jackson and Debbie Rowe is on a trip with her boyfriend, musician Michael Snoddy. Together the two have been traipsing around the city of lights stopping at a few touristy hot spots.

She first shared an image of her and her boyfriend in front of the Eiffel Tower. They both look like they're on cloud nine.

Hours later, Snoddy shared a similar image with a clever caption.

I ❤️ Paris! #understatement

A photo posted by Michael Snoddy (@michaelsnoddy) on

Paris also shared a pastel-tinted snap of the Champs-Élysées.

And like most jet-lagged travelers, the two refueled on coffee.

What a great way to start 2017!

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Look At These Amazing Throwbacks Of Val & Maks Chmerkovskiy

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What are brothers for if not posting embarrassing old photos of each other for all the world to see? That's how Valentin Chmerkovskiy wished his older brother Maksim a happy 37th birthday on Tuesday. Val actually went above and beyond the call of brotherly duty, digging up twelve amazing throwback pictures as well as penning a sweet tribute.

Val started off with an adorable picture from the Dancing With The Stars pros' childhood in Ukraine, in which they're sporting matching Christmas sweaters. “To my brother happy birthday. We came a long way love you," he wrote.

The 30-year-old worked his way forward in time from there, through their awkward teenage years, emigration to America and into adulthood. He captioned one pic, featuring matching mullet cuts, "to the days when we thought rockin a mullet would help us assimilate in 'merica." In another, he thanked Maks for sticking with him "thru my pinky ring and acne phase."

One of the most recent shots is of the brothers in Disney World. "20 years too late but shiii we did it," the caption reads.

Val's last post, though, is where things get emotional. It could be a poem, or it could be rap lyrics. Either way, it's long, gushy, and full of brotherly love. "My personal favorite verse: "women always near me but you my blood Running in me/flowing thru my veins like,rivers when it rains.. you did for me what Jordan did for Hanes."

Now that's a true bromance.

to my brother happy birthday. We came a long way 😂😂😂 love you @maksimc #happybirthdaymaks

A photo posted by Valentin (@iamvalc) on

started.. #happybirthdaymaks

A photo posted by Valentin (@iamvalc) on

our OTB phase. Welcome to America #happybirthdayMaks

A photo posted by Valentin (@iamvalc) on

stuck with me thru my pinky ring and acne phase #happybirthdaymaks

A photo posted by Valentin (@iamvalc) on

to the days when we thought rockin a mullet would help us assimilate in 'merica #happybirthdaymaks

A photo posted by Valentin (@iamvalc) on

finally went to Disneyworld ... 20 years too late but shiii we did it. 😂😂 #happybirthdaymaks

A photo posted by Valentin (@iamvalc) on

Dear brother. sometimes I wonder like Stevie. Brother full of love like Philly. I know this might sound silly but, I know you gon feel me cause, you never disappear and When I call you're always near me. You are the roof, that kept me dry and when I asked to fly You took me underneath your wing And flew against the wind so high, I Never heard you say "That's mine" Cause you shared your love your time With me. Like all the time we'd be... Together. and even when apart you always had me in your heart I know, cause you there from the start till I'm under. Never wonder or doubt me. I know it's in me that..women always near me but you my blood Running in me flowing thru my veins like, rivers when it rains.. you did for me what Jordan did for Hanes... All jokes aside you always kept me by your side. forever grateful... I'll be like "check one two" And always be beside you. I love you. More than any verbal choreography can express. My gratitude to you is endless, and my ambition to return the favor will never subside. It's nice to say I made it, but it's a lot better to say that WE DID!! What's mine is yours. and always will be. #happybirthdaymaks

A photo posted by Valentin (@iamvalc) on

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Obama Commutes Chelsea Manning's Sentence

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President Barack Obama has commuted the prison sentence of Chelsea Manning, the former Army intelligence analyst who was convicted for the 2010 leak of classified government and military documents.

The White House says Manning is one of 209 inmates whose sentences Obama is shortening.

Manning is more than six years into a 35-year sentence for leaking classified documents to the anti-secrecy website WikiLeaks. Her sentence is now set to expire May 17. She was known as Bradley Manning at the time of her 2010 arrest and attempted suicide twice last year.

Obama is also pardoning 64 people, including retired Gen. James Cartwright, who was charged with making false statements during a probe into disclosure of classified information.

Most of the other people receiving commutations were serving sentences for nonviolent drug offenses.

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29 Steamy Sex Games For Very Playful Nights

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There are plenty of ways to shake up your sex life, whether it's by trying out a new sex toy or consulting the Kama Sutra. But what if you're in an especially playful mood? That's where sex games come in. You're probably familiar with some of them — sexy truth or dare, dirty dice — but have you ever given a sensory-play card game or a role-playing app a whirl?

Whether you're looking to try something new with a long-term S.O. or getting adventurous with a new partner, sex games can be just the thing you need for inspiration. Just dim the lights, turn off your phones (or keep them on if you're using a sexy app), and see how things start to heat up.

If you end up in bed before you finish the game, don't worry. In that case, everyone's a winner.

Click through to browse some of the steamiest sex games available.

With this steamy calendar, every day is an opportunity for a new bedroom adventure for you and your partner. Of course, if you'd rather spend the month focusing on yourself, may we suggest our 30-day masturbation challenge?

Adam and Eve, $12.00, available at Adam and EvePhoto: Courtesy of Adam & Eve.

This adults-only twist on Connect Four has players challenging each other to different foreplay activities, all while trying to get four pieces in a row.

Lovehoney, $19.00, available at LovehoneyPhoto: Courtesy of Lovehoney.

You and your partner tease and tempt each other around the board until one of you wins the grand prize, which is — you guessed it — oral sex.

Adam and Eve, $12.95, available at Adam and EvePhoto: Courtesy of Adam & Eve.

This set boasts — count 'em — 105 exciting and "moody" seduction suggestion cards. This is one game that will keep you busy.

Trystology, $14.00, available at trystologyPhoto: Courtesy of Trystology.

Thinking about exploring your kinkier side? This deck of position cards will show you how to add a little bondage to your normal routine. Get ready for a wild learning experience.

Lovehoney, $6.99, available at LovehoneyPhoto: Courtesy of Lovehoney.

This set of "sexploration" vouchers can either be "raunchy" or "romantic," so whether you're interested in cuddling the night away or heating things up, there's something in the deck for you.

Lovehoney, $7.99, available at LovehoneyPhoto: Courtesy of Lovehoney.

Instead of betting money in this game of poker, you're wagering erotic favors that you'll do for your partner or receive from them. If you ask us, it's a win-win either way.

Adam and Eve, $22.95, available at Adam and EvePhoto: Courtesy of Adam & Eve.

This set of dirty dice is actually customizable. Take your pick of stickers to add to the three cubes for a one-of-a-kind gambling experience.

Bijoux Indiscrets, $10.00, available at trystologyPhoto: Courtesy of Trystology.

Gift your partner a couple of Bedroom Bucks the next time you're in a giving mood. These coupons entitle the holder to a sensual massage, oral sex, and more.

Adam and Eve, $6.95, available at Adam and EvePhoto: Courtesy of Adam & Eve.

This best-selling game has you exploring your partner's body in a variety of ways, with varying levels of intensity. Draw "Mm" cards to get warmed up, "Ooh" cards to try out role-playing scenarios, and "Aah" cards to end the game with a bang.

Nookii, $24.99, available at LovehoneyPhoto: Courtesy of Lovehoney.

On paper, the object of this game is to get to 50 points before your opponent. Really though, your goal is to tease your opponent with restraints, sensory play, and more. And it comes with all the props you'll need.

Adam and Eve, $19.95, available at Adam and EvePhoto: Courtesy of Adam & Eve.

Nothing like a straightforward pair of sexy dice — one has body parts, the other has actions, and it's up to you to connect the dots.

Babeland, $7.00, available at BabelandPhoto: Courtesy of Babeland.

Feeling adventurous? The 69 Places app helps you brainstorm new locations (and events) where you can have sex. You can even check off your accomplishments.

Photo: Courtesy of iTunes.

This game gets physical from the get-go: Place color-coded stickers on your partner's body, roll the dice, and place your hands on the colors you roll.

Trystology, $15.00, available at trystologyPhoto: Courtesy of Trystology.

This set of cards is a major source of inspiration, and each idea is framed as a vow or promise ("I vow to perform oral sex on you while you are standing"), in case you have a flair for the dramatic.

Lovehoney, $8.99, available at LovehoneyPhoto: Courtesy of Lovehoney.

Think of this card game as a truth-or-dare starter kit, minus the "truth" part. Simply draw a card and do what it says, like "Kiss the player others will be the most surprised to see you kiss." Did we mention this game is great for groups?

Lets Fool Around, $9.95, available at The Pleasure ChestPhoto: Courtesy of The Pleasure Chest.

This jar of different sex position ideas will look great on any bedside table.

Craftformers, $7.52, available at EtsyPhoto: Courtesy of Etsy.

You can play all 50 I.O.U. cards at once, or draw the game out for days, swapping cards with your partner and performing the naughty acts as a surprise.

Lovehoney, $7.99, available at LovehoneyPhoto: Courtesy of Lovehoney.

The KINDU app is essentially a role-play idea generator, and it places you and your partner in a choose-your-own-adventure-style scenario where you can you select the exact fantasy you'd like to play out.

Photo: Courtesy of KINDU.

Use these question cards as flirty ice-breakers at a party or as a way to get to know your partner more intimately.

Good Vibrations, $14.95, available at Good VibrationsPhoto: Courtesy of Good Vibrations.

This game is just the thing you need to take things slow. The massage oil candle quickly melts into a sensual lotion, and the seduction cards tell you how to use it.

Adam and Eve, $22.95, available at Adam and EvePhoto: Courtesy of Adam & Eve.

Download this "hot truth or dare" app and have the largest collection of dirty truth and dare prompts at your finger tips.

Photo: Courtesy of iTunes.

What you and your partner do to each other depends on where you land on the board. Can you guess what you get to do when you reach the final square?

Adam and Eve, $12.95, available at Adam and EvePhoto: Courtesy of Adam & Eve.

This is about as straightforward as it gets: Each card has an article of clothing printed on it. Every time you draw a card, your partner must remove the corresponding piece of clothing.

The Pleasure Chest, $7.95, available at The Pleasure ChestPhoto: Courtesy of The Pleasure Chest.

Live out your wildest affair fantasies with your partner in this intense role-playing board game.

Lovehoney, $32.99, available at LovehoneyPhoto: Courtesy of Lovehoney.

These cards are basically dirty Mad Libs: Fill in the blanks in these sex scenarios to make them steamier or sillier.

Trystology, $14.00, available at trystologyPhoto: Courtesy of Trystology.

With dice, cards, and props, this game will keep things hot for hours.

Adam and Eve, $24.95, available at Adam and EvePhoto: Courtesy of Adam & Eve.

This role-playing game hits all the classics, with scenarios featuring "cops and robbers" and "doctors and nurses."

The Pleasure Chest, $19.95, available at The Pleasure ChestPhoto: Courtesy of The Pleasure Chest.

With a simple slot-machine interface, the Pleasure Machine app is guaranteed to kickstart your evening, whether you're feeling romantic, playful, or wild.

Photo: Courtesy of iTunes.

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How Much Should You Actually Spend On Deconstructed Jeans?

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You know a trend has caught on when you start seeing it everywhere. But with so many options comes the question: Which one is actually Worth It? Every Tuesday, we're looking at a different fashion girl favorite and the varying price points it comes in, and letting you know — straight up — how much you should really be spending. You work hard for your money; why not put it towards pieces that matter?

Some would argue you can't put a price on the perfect pair of jeans. But with the recent rise of Vetements-style deconstructed denim popping up at literally every single store we know, we've found ourselves wondering: How much is really appropriate to spend on some trend-driven baby blues?

Since you probably have at least one trusty pair in each of the classic silhouettes — the skinny, the flare, the boyfriend — it can feel kind of crazy to shell out a good amount of money on a style we don't know will still be relevant by this time next season. To weigh the variety of deconstructed options available, we kept in mind the few key elements that make the look feel so of-the-moment: Front seams, a step hem, and some type of unique pocket placement or back detailing.

With that in mind, we rounded up six options, from the runway OG to the fast-fashion iteration, and decided if this is a trend you should be splurging or saving on. Click through to see the many ways you can nab a pair for yourself, as well as our verdict for the one's that are definitely #worthit.

What You're Spending: $1,395 $977

What You're Getting: Let us introduce you to the pair that started it all, made by Vetements. At full price, these would set you back $1,500 — but at the moment, they're on sale for just under-$1,000. Here's how we feel: If you're label-obsessed and always want to get your hands on the real deal, by all means, treat yourself. But, to be totally transparent, we'd say it isn't necessary to drop a grand on a pair of jeans (runway-approved or not), especially considering how trend-driven these are (meaning by next season, Vetements will already be showing the next big thing).

Vetements Season 1 Jeans, $1,395 $977, available at Forward by Elise Walker.

What You're Spending: $449

What You're Getting: Frame's 'Le Mix' jean is probably the closest option to the Vetements pair in both style and quality — though the dark wash actually makes them feel more polished, and they're only about half the price. And while we're not all that crazy about the whiskering on the front, each pair of these is unique, so you'll definitely feel like you're getting something special.

Frame Nouveau Le Mix, $449, available at Frame.

What You're Spending: $269

What You're Getting: Paige took the silhouette and made it more casual for everyday wear. Here, the front hem looks more like an intentional detail, rather than looking like two pairs of jeans sewn together (though the back still that re-sewn pocket detail). While these are definitely cute and easy to style, they give off a way different vibe than the originals.

Paige Vintage Julia Jeans with Uneven Hem, $269, available at Shopbop.

What You're Spending: $98

What You're Getting: For just under-$100, you can get a pretty sick take on this trend from Urban Outfitters. The brand took actual Levi's jeans and reconstructed them, so you're buying something that possesses that inherent cool factor. Sure, these don't have the front seams or stepped hem à la Vetements, but you could easily D.I.Y. that part yourself.

Urban Renewal Remade Levi's Sliced Pocket Reconstructed Jean, $98, available at Urban Outfitters.

What You're Spending: $49.99

What You're Getting: When you hit the under-$50 mark, the style becomes more of an approximation. H&M actually had a previous pair that was closer to the Vetements version a few months ago, but it obviously sold out in a heartbeat. As of now, this is the closest the store's got — but they're a slightly slimmer fit and feature a different take on the deconstruction. If you're on a tighter budget, these still count for a creative way to change up your usual jeans — though they miss the mark on that whole cut-up hem thing.

H&M Slim Regular Patchwork Jeans, $39.99, available at H&M.

What You're Spending: $43

What You're Getting: At the lowest price point we could find currently on the market, this pair of denim definitely lacks some of the depth and interest of the original style. Something about this silhouette and cut looks a bit uncomfortable, and the back pockets are missing that signature detailing (though we do love the front seam). Still, they're an inexpensive way to feel like you're taking part in the trend without going overboard.

Noisy May Donna Step Hem Jean with Fray Seam Detail, $43, available at ASOS.

The Verdict: Go With The High Of The Low

To really get the cool-girl effect of this denim trend, we recommend you go with the highest price of the lower-end batch — a.k.a. the $98 Urban Outfitters pair. They have that same authentic, rough-around-the-edges allure as the original Vetements pair, but cost a fraction of the price. That way, you can save your bigger spending for the next It item that comes around, but still feel like you've got your hands on something that makes a statement.

Urban Renewal Remade Levi's Sliced Pocket Reconstructed Jean, $98, available at Urban Outfitters.

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30 Money Diarists Spill What Happened After Their 7-Day Diary

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Exactly one year ago today, Refinery29 published its very first money diary, and we watched, surprised, as readers commented on everything from the diarist's eating habits to her job prospects to the seemingly out-of-nowhere line of coke.

We've published 102 diaries since then, and it's been quite a journey. We've gone as far as Singapore and Australia, found variety in the many, many diarists of New York City, and discovered the countless ways women spend and save their money regardless of salary.

To celebrate the one year anniversary of the series, we reached out to every single diarist to ask what they learned from the experience. Did they change any of their spending habits? Did they love or hate the comments? Did they, in the end, learn more about their money?

Ahead, 30 diarists reflect on their experience with the Money Diary community. And, as we continue to grow our pool of submissions, we'd like to say thank you for being a reader, a writer, a critic, or all three. We're opening up our submissions to include diarists of any gender, and we hope the series continues to be an eye-opening experience for everyone.

Have a Money Diary you'd like to share? Fill out our submission form here.

"I was spending too much on coffee! I've stopped doing that and am contributing $3 a day to a savings account specifically reserved for seeing Britney Spears in Las Vegas using the app Qapital.

"Also, as much as I was constantly concerned about money before doing the money diary, now I think about it even more. It made me want to keep one all the time!" — A Week In NYC On A $40k Salary

"I learned that (to me at least) money diaries are about how people spend their money — whether the money comes from a steady paycheck or a savings account is irrelevant. I think it's a great habit to physically write down spending habits because visually seeing the amounts total up is a lot more intense than just swiping a credit card. I learned that I'm good about not overspending, but also that when I do spend, it is usually on food.

"Also, I loved participating in this! I read the diaries (and other articles, too) religiously. I just graduated early from UCLA, so my entire world is shifting from college student to full-time employee in the 'real world.' Maybe I will submit a new money diary to compare!" — A Week In Los Angeles On A UCLA Student's Budget

"I loved reading the responses — especially from someone nervous about moving to my city on a similar budget. After reading my article, she felt better about being able to afford to live in Philly!

"While that week I had some big expenses (a vet visit and a Keratin treatment), I was definitely more conscious of saving on small things like packing lunch and taking advantage of free food at work." — 6 Women Get Real About How They Spend Their Diverse Salaries: Philadelphia

"The experience was an interesting one! Through keeping the diary, I learned that even though I was trying to be spendthrift and cut back on certain items, I was still spending way too much on coffees and expensive lunches because I wasn't being prepared and making lunches, etc. at home or keeping up with grocery shopping.

"Since the diary, I've made more of an effort to skip eating and drinking out as those seemingly small expenses were really adding up. The experience, and the comments, also inspired me to finally take the plunge and dive into a vegan lifestyle after somewhat haphazardly trying to transition to vegetarian/gluten-free before.

"Someone commented, 'Live your compassionate truth,' and I thought, W hy not ? It propelled me to think a little deeper about what was important to me and inspired me to do a little more research. Overall, a positive experience!" — A Week In Chicago On A $42,000 Salary

"I enjoyed doing the money diary. It definitely made me more conscious of my spending, and I was actually pretty happy with how I was already managing my money. It also made me very aware of how much cheaper things would be once I left NYC, and I can definitely confirm that after having moved.

"The other thing I noticed was how judgmental the commenters — and myself — can be while reading a one-week glimpse into a person they know literally nothing about. For example, I have no loans because I paid them off already, and what loans I did have were likely minimal compared to others because I stayed in-state and worked the whole time I was in school.

"People don't know everything about the diarist, and so they automatically jump to conclusions. I noticed how much I was doing that when I read other peoples' diaries, so I think it helped make me think twice before judging their week. I also thought it was funny that people in the comment section were so hung up on my rent. I wanted to tell them it was a shithole fourth-floor walk-up that had been on fire twice during the four years I lived there. LOL." — A Week In NYC On A $291,000 Joint Salary

"I learned that I took money for granted. I wrote a money diary while I was unemployed and tracking money down to the cent was exhausting and eye-opening. I also realized that saving money isn't nearly as important as budgeting money. Spending $20 on groceries is not the same as spending $20 on a T-shirt." — A Week Being Unemployed In New Jersey

"Even though a few commenters were pretty quick to judge me on a single week of my spending (I'm looking at you, dude who commented, 'She's so terrible oh my god'), I was really surprised and happy to see that my money diary was relatable to so many women. Secondly, I learned how valuable tracking my spending can be. I was on my best behavior, in terms of my spending, when I knew I'd be submitting this money diary to Refinery29. Tracking my spending more consistently has definitely helped me stay within my budget." — A Week In Los Angeles On A $61,800 Salary

"For me, the most surprising thing was the overwhelmingly positive feedback from Refinery29's readers. I was a bit worried that people would be super harsh about being the 'I quit my job to travel' stereotype, but people were very kind and encouraging. It felt very nice to see such support!" — How One Woman Quit Her Job To Travel The World

"I loved the process of actually thinking about what I was purchasing. I track every single penny I spend in an app, but I don't normally include this level of detail. It was a good reflection process. I did think it was interesting how people responded to my diary very negatively, whether by criticizing my spending, doubting how hard I work by saying I don't deserve my salary, or that I am defrauding my company by doing certain things. I hated my boyfriend seeing it after I said people were being mean and having him be surprised at my spending!" — A Week In NYC On A $240,000 Salary

"I was surprised about how much I really spend versus how much I thought I spend. (I spend way more than I think on things I cannot remember.) I enjoy reading everyone's entries, however I do notice some commenters are quite harsh. One comment to my post was, and I quote, 'I almost puked in my mouth when she said she travels with her dog in an Uber.' I think in the U.S. [it may sound] extreme but that's definitely the most cost-effective transportation mode in Singapore. So I guess a bit more context about the cost of living of the cities in which the writer resides in would be helpful to make the post more relatable." — A Week In Singapore On A $118,000 Salary

"I think the week I chose was a good week for me (which is probably why I chose it, because I didn't feel that bad about it) and that I am cognizant of trying to cut corners where I can (by ordering pizza instead of going out, for example, and by using airline miles to visit my long distance boyfriend, because those regular flights were hitting my bank account hard). I also realized after looking at that week that I probably let my BF pay for too many things! I thought I was better about splitting things than I am!" — A Week In Austin On A $100,000 Salary

"I am getting ready to leave my $600 digs — I've signed a lease and am purchasing furniture — and let me just say, I don't regret that aggressive savings strategy one bit. I'm glad I have it now to help me with my move!" — A Week In Silicon Valley On A $100,000 Salary

"First, in relation to wedding planning, I completely under-budgeted what I expected to spend just in the last two weeks of the wedding. [But] overall, the process taught me to keep track of the minor things I spend my money on. They add up quickly! My normal process is to budget down to the last dollar, and that tends to stress me out when I reach my last $100 or so. The money diary helped me realize that having some money as a buffer allowed me to feel more comfortable. Also, the tracking helped me feel more in control. I see a similarity between eating healthy and budgeting — when I write down what I eat or spend, I tend to be more thoughtful and make better decisions." — A Week Planning A Wedding: Denver

"So something I learned about doing the money diary process would definitely be that I show up to work hungover and needing a latte way more than necessary — however, I swear that's not common practice. I feel pretty good about my weekly spending but I have started tracking it more and being more conscious about where my money is going. I love reading other people's money diaries and try not to judge too much on spending habits because it's hard to stick to a budget sometimes. My husband and I recently looked into relocating to California for a job opportunity for him, and it was insane how much the cost of living there was going to affect our current lifestyle — especially since we both have really awesome paying jobs for our age. We know we are extremely lucky and try not to take it for granted.

"Also, I feel like the commenters went way easy on me, but that might be because, on paper, it looks like my life is pretty together. Trust me, [that's] not the case at all — life is hard!" — A Week In Houston On A $108,000 Salary

"I was always worried about over-spending, to the point that when I saw the diary, I saw how LITTLE I spent. While I believe in keeping a budget and not wasting money, I've since tried to loosen up and not fear a small coffee as a treat now and then." — A Week In Washington, D.C., On An $80K Salary

"In doing money diaries and generally tracking my money, I realize I spend a fair amount on gifts for friends — books especially. I've put myself on a 'gift budget' limiting how much I spend on gifts, but it's hard, especially with books because they bring me so much joy and I hope they bring my friends joy in reading them." — A Week In London On A $108,000 Salary

"It was eye-opening to write my daily routine down. My father said last year that he knows many people who make three times what I do, and yet, I am living better, not simply existing. I agree. I could be a little looser and have a little more fun; I could not hide from the reality of my hermit tendencies when they were blaring at me from the website. The grass is always greener.

"Every single comment was a compliment, and the positive, anonymous feedback was spectacular. But overseas, just like in the States, the struggle is real, the problems increasing. There is something beautiful about Americans; how quickly they can unite, and how quickly they can divide. I miss this at times; at times, no." — A Week In Rome On A $40,000 Salary

"I think the biggest thing I learned after my money diary was that I was being a little too strict with how I was spending my money. This year I paid down over $10k in debt, but felt at times like I couldn't go out and have fun or buy stuff like socks. I'm very proud of the progress I made with my debt, but I've also learned to budget some for the fun stuff...and the socks." — A Week In America On A $65,000 Salary: Washington, D.C.

"It was disappointing that commenters nitpicked the little things I splurged on (celebratory champagne with my high school BFF), while nobody acknowledged how much I have in savings — a chunk of change I'm pretty proud of. I've learned that I'm more responsible with my spending than I give myself credit for...tracking everything definitely made me realize that." — A Week In NYC On A $36,000 Salary

"Learned: Compared to other contributors, I feel like I'm underpaid! Most important thing I learned is that I'm terrible at budgeting.

"Hated: Yes [commenters] are harsh and judgmental. Living in NY is expensive. It's difficult to have any social life without spending a dime." — "Trying To Bring Lunch To Work More Often," Says Everyone, Ever.

"My diary was during a week of very unusual, very high spending as I stocked up on items at Costco. I'm actually still using a lot of the stuff up! But in re-reading the diary, I realized I definitely overspent on items I really don't need to be buying in bulk (I may never finish that vegan protein powder...), and on my most recent Costco trip, I spent a tiny fraction of what I would usually spend and still had plenty of stuff to fill the fridge. Just because I don't get to Costco often doesn't mean I need to buy the entire store, and I'll save money in the future by being more thoughtful about those types of purchases. I've started keeping a money diary, just for me, to see if I can identify any other places to save." — A Week In Philadelphia On A $57,200 Salary

"My habits haven't changed much since tracking my spending habits — largely because I don't have a lot of discretionary income right now! However, my husband has recently gone vegan (he is lactose intolerant, and decided to also do an elimination diet to identify other possible stomach issues). Because of this diet change, we've had to be much more creative with meal planning and cooking, and we have ended up going over our $100/week food budget the last two weeks in a row. Still trying to figure out a way to make meals diverse, filling, and budget-friendly!

"Also, I realized after tracking my spending that I should be much better about having a 'gift fund' for birthdays, holidays, weddings, and showers. Four of our friends are getting married within six months of each other, and both my husband and I have wedding party roles in a couple of them. I think our bank account is about to grow wings! Ideally, we should at least throw $20 each month into a gift fund so it makes less of a ding when these occasions inevitably arise! The thing that was most inspiring was reading the comments on my diary. I got a lot of positive feedback. I have to say, as someone who often feels conflicted about passing on social events because of lack of funds, it was nice to be recognized for not living beyond my means. I do still have a social life — I just do things like have friends over to share a bottle of wine, coffee dates, and matinee movies." — A Week In Orange County On A $40,000 Joint Salary

"My diary reflected my life as a college student and paid intern making a little above minimum wage, and I definitely received a lot of negative feedback in the comments about spending above my means.

"Looking back on that diary now, I actually feel proud of how I managed my money. Living in an expensive city, I have to spend more on transportation, food, and rent than some people, and while I certainly could have skipped a couple Starbucks runs or opted for a cheaper lunch, my spending was not extravagant.

"In addition, readers of my diary wouldn’t necessarily have known that I worked through high school and college to save a substantial amount of money to live off of. This means that I am not solely relying on my current income, but also pulling from that savings account when needed. I think anyone willing to track their spending for a week is generally conscious of their budget, which is why I read every diary with an open mind." — A Week In Washington, D.C., On An Intern's Salary

"What I learned from the Money Diary process is that the commenters seem to have NO IDEA that these diaries are user submitted. They constantly blame Refinery29 for 'being out of touch' when they could easily submit their own and be judged if they wanted. I also learned that if I give my fiancé exactly half of the amount of money it takes to pay our bills, but he goes online and pays them, 'I have my boyfriend pay all my bills for me like a spoiled brat.' Erm, no. We split the bills, thanks.

"Lastly, I learned that there are a number of lucky young ladies out there who have parents with the capability to pay for things such as phones and health insurance for them. I am not one of these ladies but IF my mother could pay for these things for me she certainly would! Can't we lift each other up? Can't you see that someone has something going for them that (for the time being) makes things a bit easier? Is that not ok? We all have different life experiences and there in no point in putting someone down when they are being helped, even if that is not the way your life went. Try being happy for other people, it feels better." — 8 Women With Similar Salaries Spend Them VERY Differently: Denver

"Money Diaries was SO fun for me to write! It made me hyper aware of every cent I was spending and it was definitely eye-opening to see how much I was spending, especially on coffee and cabs. Now I try and take the subway as much as possible, although my coffee is non-negotiable." — 8 Women With Similar Salaries Spend Them VERY Differently: New York

"Keeping track of my weekly spending to write a money diary helped me become more aware of my personal finances. I realized that it's actually not hard to watch closely what I spend my money on, but it's something most people (me included!) rarely do for some reason. I also acknowledged that I'm probably spending too much on groceries and not enough on entertainment. After all, I'm only 24, and YOLO, right?" — 8 Women With Similar Salaries Spend Them VERY Differently: Boston

"Since I already keep track of my expenses via an Excel sheet, as well as a notebook detailing exactly what I actually spent the money on (shampoo at CVS, lunch at Chipotle, etc.), I loved the concept of a money diary. It allowed me to expand these thoughts, and turn what I was spending money on into more of a personal story.

"It also taught me that it is OK to make a big purchase or two once in a while, especially if it's in my budget! It might seem scary to spend that much money on one item, but if it is worth it and you can afford it, go for it. I also learned that many commenters were quick to judge those who 'got free money from their parents' — this is the only part I disliked. It is unfair to try and gauge someone's whole financial situation by a few paragraphs about what they spend money on, or how much they 'get from their parents.' It also doesn't make them less independent, and there are often many other circumstances involved. Overall it was a great experience, and I was able to learn more about my spending and saving habits, while hopefully giving others insight as well!" — 8 Women With Similar Salaries Spend Them VERY Differently: San Francisco

"While putting together my money diary, I realized that I need to be much more careful when writing out my expenses. I totally forgot to incorporate all the money that automatically goes into savings (which is a lot), my 401K, donations to charities and my alma mater, etc. I got skewered in the comments because I looked super irresponsible. Also, rereading it made me realize how desperate I was to form connections with my peers and that I used going out for food and coffee as a way to do so." — A Week In NYC On A $55,000 Salary

"I have actually found many benefits through reading other diaries versus creating my own. I have always been very on top of my spending by using Mint.com daily, but in reading other women’s journals, I have learned cool new savings ideas and gained general food for thought. Some have been ideas like buying toiletries in bulk off of Amazon or unplugging all electronics when not in use for a month, and then there’s general knowledge like how much people usually pay for their phones and groceries, as well as becoming aware of how much it can cost to raise a child.

"Money diaries have also inspired me to look into ways to reach women and share my tips and tricks about saving/spending. I received a number of comments from women saying they were impressed with my savings, and one even said I inspired her to leave her low paying job, which was the biggest compliment I could imagine. I am very passionate about empowering women to negotiate their salaries and save as much as possible so they can be completely independent (and be badasses in retirement!). I may try to start some sort of money blog to share my ideas." — A Week In Washington, D.C. On An $89,000 Salary

"By writing down what I spend and the circumstances around it, I was able to identify where and why I spend money — particularly the eating out. I could curb unnecessary lunches by planning better or having snacks when I travel. After publishing, I also realized even more how personal someone's financial decisions are. What appears to be a gamble to one person is a perfectly sound decision to another. The way that people spend their money is a peek into their personalities and what they value." — A Week In The Midwest On A $52,000 Salary

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THIS Is How To Put On A Wig Like A Pro

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When you're in a beauty rut, it's a little like looking in your closet and seeing absolutely nothing to wear. Sure, you have the bones to create a killer look — a bold liner here, a bottle of texture spray there — but sometimes you just need a boost of inspiration. That's why we created Short Cuts, a series of quick, easy-to-follow videos meant to educate, empower, and excite the beauty nerds in all of us. Whether you're looking to learn something new or to refresh your current routine, there's a Short Cut for you.

The beginning of January means frigid temps in much of the country — bringing with it the need for protective hairstyles. Donning a wig is a simple option when you want to safely tuck away your strands. Plus, it’s a heat free way to try a new look out for size. Though the challenge of making a wig look natural can seem daunting, a few foolproof tricks can get you the slay you’ve always wanted.

Press play above to see the technique in action, then try it yourself using the steps below.

Step 1: Make sure your hair is ultra moisturized, then braid it back into medium-sized cornrows that allow everything to lay flat.

Step 2. Use a wig cap to protect your hair.

Step 3: With your fingers, apply your favorite edge control product or gel to lay down your edges to perfection.

Step 4: Line the wig part up as desired and use the wig combs to secure it onto your hair. Make sure not to pull too tight!

Step 5: Pull the wig down and adjust as necessary. Flat ironing can help smooth down the top to mimic your hair.

Like what you see? Follow Short Cuts on Facebook for more videos.

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Zahara Jolie-Pitt's Biological Mother Reportedly Wants To Reconnect With Her

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A woman claiming to be Zahara Jolie-Pitt's biological mother has reportedly opened up about her hopes to connect with her daughter. But that doesn't mean she's not grateful for everything Angelina Jolie has done for her child.

"Angelina has been more of a mother to her than I have ever been," Mentewab Dawit Lebiso reportedly told the Daily Mail, speaking of Zahara. "She has been with her since she was a baby, but that does not mean I do not miss her."

Lebiso, who lives in poverty in Ethiopia, gave Zahara up for adoption after being raped, according to the Daily Mail. She has no other children. Lebiso also told the outlet that she misses her daughter every day.

"I just want her to know that I am alive and here and long to be able to speak with her," Lebiso reportedly told the publication. "I do not want my daughter back but just to be in contact with her and be able to call her up and talk with her."

Zahara was adopted when she was 6 months old, and Lebiso hasn't been in contact with her since then, according to the paper. The Daily Mail notes that Jolie likely didn't know Zahara's biological mother was alive until 2007, as she'd previously been told that Zahara's birth parents had died from AIDS.

Lebiso reportedly stressed that she doesn't want money from Jolie — she just wants to speak with her daughter.

A rep for Jolie didn't immediately respond to a request for comment. We will update this story as more information becomes available.

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MAC Is Launching 28 Electric Lipstick Shades That Will Rock Your World

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MAC ColourRocker Lipstick in Show And Teal, $17, available in February at MAC.

Let’s be clear: There is nothing fundamentally wrong with owning 50 lipsticks in subtle variations of red, pink, and nude. (In fact, we fully support it.) But when you find yourself falling into a color rut of perfectly pleasant — but ultimately snooze-worthy — shades, it’s time to throw a wild card into the mix. That's where MAC's ColourRocker line steps in.

The beauty behemoth’s expansive range of lip colors is already the stuff of legend, but its new 28-shade collection is a little different from the rest. For starters, only a handful of the offerings are the kinds of hues the everyday lipstick enthusiast is accustomed to. You’ll find a few beige nudes, a bold orange-red or two, and just a couple of pinks among them. But the rest are out-of-the-box greens, purples, yellows, blues, and black — all ready to break you out of your comfort zone. Plus, at a reasonably affordable $17 a pop, trying a new hue isn't all that risky.

Check out the fearless picks in the slides ahead, then get ready to burst out of your bubble — and let your newfound confidence lead you to the MAC store (or website) when the launch drops next month.

MAC ColourRocker Lipstick in Blue Bang!, $17, available in February at MAC.

MAC ColourRocker Lipstick in Deep With Envy, $17, available in February at MAC.

MAC ColourRocker Lipstick in Darling Clementine, $17, available in February at MAC.

MAC ColourRocker Lipstick in Indigo-Go, $17, available in February at MAC.

MAC ColourRocker Lipstick in Digging It, $17, available in February at MAC.

MAC ColourRocker Lipstick in Cold Hard Cash, $17, available in February at MAC.

MAC ColourRocker Lipstick in Evening Buzz, $17, available in February 2017 at MAC.

MAC ColourRocker Lipstick in Bunnybeams, $17, available in February at MAC.

MAC ColourRocker Lipstick in Forbidden Sunrise, $17, available in February at MAC.

MAC ColourRocker Lipstick in Carmine Rouge, $17, available in February at MAC.

MAC ColourRocker Lipstick in Instant Icon, $17, available in February at MAC.

MAC ColourRocker Lipstick in In The Spirit, $17, available in February at MAC.

MAC ColourRocker Lipstick in Breathing Fire, $17, available in February at MAC.

MAC ColourRocker Lipstick in Night Mint, $17, available in February at MAC.

MAC ColourRocker Lipstick in In My Fashion, $17, available in February at MAC.

MAC ColourRocker Lipstick in Gritty Girl, $17, available in February at MAC.

MAC ColourRocker Lipstick in Feeling Fizzy, $17, available in February at MAC.

MAC ColourRocker Lipstick in Into The Madness, $17, available in February at MAC.

MAC ColourRocker Lipstick in Flatter Me Fierce, $17, available in February at MAC.

MAC ColourRocker Lipstick in City Slick, $17, available in February at MAC.

MAC ColourRocker Lipstick in Jean Genie, $17, available in February at MAC.

MAC ColourRocker Lipstick in Mean Green Machine, $17, available in February at MAC.

MAC ColourRocker Lipstick in Uncontrollable, $17, available in February at MAC.

MAC ColourRocker Lipstick in Secret #, $17, available in February at MAC.

MAC ColourRocker Lipstick in Yellow You Dare?, $17, available in February at MAC.

MAC ColourRocker Lipstick in Mud Wrestler, $17, available in February at MAC.

MAC ColourRocker Lipstick in Matte Royal, $17, available in February at MAC.

MAC ColourRocker Lipstick in Show And Teal, $17, available in February at MAC.

Like this post? There's more. Get tons of beauty tips, tutorials, and news on the Refinery29 Beauty Facebook page. Like us on Facebook — we'll see you there!

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Why The ACA Is So Important, According To Someone Who Sold Insurance

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This week, the House of Representatives took the first steps to dismantle the Affordable Care Act, also known as Obamacare. While we're still waiting to see what will happen, many people have spoken out and explained just how important the ACA was to them. The latest to go viral is from Jeremy Beckham, who sold health insurance in Utah from 2004-2006. In a Facebook post, Beckham explains that during his two years at a major U.S. insurance company, he had to turn people away on a daily basis.

"I had to console people in tears on a regular basis," he wrote. "We were instructed by management to just get them off the phone as quickly as possible to free the phone line for a healthy person."

Among the reasons that he had to decline coverage included pre-existing conditions. The ACA ensured that insurance companies could not turn people away if they had a history of cancer, heart attacks, stroke, and more. Beckham also mentioned that insurance companies could turn people away if they had received any form of mental health care. Diabetes, pre-diabetes, and even obesity and pulmonary disease were grounds for an automatic "DNQ" or "does not qualify."

Fortunately, Beckham explains, pregnant women often qualified for Medicaid. The post has been shared over 25,000 times, which is a testament to how important the ACA is to the many people who have relied on it.

You can read Beckham's entire post, below:

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Black Tights That Don't Rip: Do They Exist?

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Illustrated by Anna Sudit.

Update: Black tights: Can't live with 'em, can't live without 'em. Since winter is here (even though we don't want to face it), we tested out five pairs (of varying prices, textures, and fits) to know exactly which ones you should be adding to your wardrobe this season. And, for any that have sold out, we've provided some similar alternatives. Consider this your cheat sheet to keep your legs warm the next few months.

This story was originally published on October 29, 2014.

It doesn't matter if you only wear black tights when you really need to or if you've advanced to Zooey Deschanel-levels of doesn't-matter-if-it's-July-give-me-my-tights levels of obsession: No one likes a flimsy pair of hose. And, if you're a woman who falls on the clumsier end of the spectrum, holding onto a pair of tights for an entire season feels like a feat that deserves a merit badge.

We've adopted habits to get around accidental snags (raise your hand if you only file your nails after cutting them during black tights season). We've avoided buying certain clothes and shoes, and even choose to avoid suspect seats out of a fear of snags. Add to that our insistence on only wearing truly opaque tights that 1. don't give us crotch sag, and 2. can actually make it through a spin cycle without unraveling, and you're dealing with a set of variables that can make one seriously consider the Taylor Momsen school of style.

The hosiery market isn't a small one, and there are literally thousands of weaves, blends, elasticities, and fibers to confound you. But, among them all are a handful of cult faves to which tights-wearers have sworn allegiance (and if you know a tights-wearer, you know that she's fanatical). We stretched these tights to the limit, committed ourselves to abusing our legs, and provided our honest-to-Lycra reviews.

Ahead, the no-bull truth about tights that'll never fail you.

Related

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Uniqlo

The Pair: Women Heattech Tights

The Price: $12.90 $9.90

The Durability: These felt much sturdier than drugstore tights, but there was enough inelasticity in the material that I immediately felt like I needed to be careful with these (and after catching a knee on a coffee table edge and starting a tiny rip, it was evident that being careful is necessary). If you're a tights-abuser, the weave on these will snag easily enough, and you'll end up with long, thick runs that'll render them useless. However, the real pro to these are Heattech technology. It wasn't cold enough when I was testing these out to really see it work its magic, but I have friends who swear that Uniqlo Heattech tights are warmer than jeans during NYC winters.

The Opacity: These are very black and very, very matte, but if there's any sign of stretch (especially at the knees), you'll come across some sheerness issues.

The Sag-Factor: Uniqlo tights only come in two sizes (S/M and L/XL), which is unfortunate, because both run short. For me, that's not too much of an issue (the control top keeps them hiked up and in place all day). But, for my longer-legged sisters, you'll definitely have drop-crotch issues.

The Verdict: Uniqlo has four pairs of non-Heattech tights that are half the price, which is just cheap enough where you might feel blasé about errant rips and runs (prices also drop significantly during sales). But, if fit and longevity is a big concern, you might want to skip Uniqlo.

Illustrated by Anna Sudit.

Uniqlo Women Heattech Tights, $9.90, available at Uniqlo.

Spanx

The Pair: Uptown Tight-End Blackout Tights

The Price: $38

The Durability: Full confession: These were my go-to brand of tights before this experiment. As a cheapie-pair-only wearer for years and years, I was forced into buying a pair on a very cold November day since the shop didn't sell anything else. That was four years ago. I still own these tights. I have gone hiking in them, assembled furniture in them, and bruised myself against pointed corners in them. They developed two small rips in the left toe and upper thigh during Year Three, but because of the weave, they haven't gotten any bigger than a quarter inch.

The Opacity: They're a true, deep black — completely opaque — but have a slight sheen to them that gets shinier with wear.

The Sag-Factor: They're vise-like, to a fault. For the first two months of wearing them in, your hips might be sore at the end of the day. For that reason, don't buy the extra-high waist one unless you have masochistic tendencies (or don't need your diaphragm to breathe). However, after dozens of washings, they're still very elastic and never budge.

The Verdict: No pain, no gain, right? I'm constantly amazed at how durable these tights are, but the break-in period can be brutal. I now own two pairs of these, and I made sure to size up two sizes…but still. Ow. Out of all the tights I tried, these are (probably) the only ones that allow you to jump into a swimming pool filled with steel wool and emerge sans snag.

Illustrated by Anna Sudit.

Spanx Luxe Leg Blackout Tights, $38, available at Spanx.

DKNY

The Pair: Super Opaque Control Top Tight

The Price: $16

The Durability: Soft, but still snug (you definitely get the feeling that you're in a pair of tights with these), the DKNY felt like a hardy pair that don't immediately snag. However, after a week's wear with ankle boots, I did develop slight pilling around the ankles. Also — and I take full responsibility for this because it says on the package that they're hand wash-only — I machine-washed and -dried these tights. When brusquely pulling them on in a sleepy haze the next morning, my fingers ripped clear through the left side. Oops.

The Opacity: Slightly sheer. There's no sheen to these, but they weren't as aggressively opaque as I like.

The Sag-Factor: No sagging! If anything, there was a bit of extra length in these (for reference, I'm 5'3" and typically wear a size 25 pant). The feet are slightly squarer than most, and might leave you with paddles for toes, which means you can't wear them with open-toed shoes.

The Verdict: These aren't a bad choice of tights for women who are a little more delicate with their clothes and don't maul their stockings when they put them on. And, for $16, you're getting a ton of quality for the price. These tights also come in a huge range of sizes, unlike most brands out there.

Illustrated by Anna Sudit.

DKNY Super Opaque Control Top Tight, $15, available at DKNY.

Commando

The Pair: Perfectly Opaque Control Tights

The Price: $40

The Durability: It rained hard the first day I wore these tights and since I somehow managed to leave all my rain boots at the office, I had to wear an old pair of waterproof boots with a ragged edge that has a reputation for completely destroying cheap tights. After a day of abuse, I stripped off the wet tights, quickly washed them, and hung them up to dry. In the morning, they were like new. Seriously!

The Opacity: Despite what the name might say, they are not "perfectly opaque," though they are perfectly matte. The weave of these tights is also of high quality, and so fine and silky (without been shiny) that I could nearly overlook the slight sheerness.

The Sag-Factor: Commando's whole thing is that their products feel invisible. And, these tights were, out of the bunch, the softest, gentlest tights I tried. However, that also meant that they weren't very good at controlling my top and started sagging by mid-day of the first wear. Throughout the day, I ended up with a one-inch gap, which — while not terrible — was pretty annoying.

The Verdict: For ladies who hate the feeling of wearing pants, you'll probably appreciate Commando's tights for how soft and non-pinchy they are (a couple hours in, I forgot that I was even wearing tights…and that's while they were still wet from the rain). If you've got longer legs, you might have issues with sagging, but size up if you suspect that's the case.

Illustrated by Anna Sudit.

Commando Ultimate Opaque Control Tights, $38, available at Commando.

Wolford

The Pair: Mat Opaque 80

The Price: $55. The Rolls Royce of the bunch.

The Durability: For how soft these are (and they are definitely luxuriously soft), these were also surprisingly resilient. TMI alert: I put these on after clipping my finger and toenails, which would have normally decimated a cheap pair of tights, but there was nary a fray. After running them through a washing machine spin cycle, they emerged exactly like new.

The Opacity: Here's the thing. These are opaque, and don't have even a hint of shine. However, the Mat Opaques are not perfectly black (in certain light, they look navy or brown). This can drive some people crazy, and yet be totally cool for others. Different strokes.

The Sag-Factor: As someone used to The Squeeze (see: review for Spanx), I was completely perplexed when I put these Wolford tights on for the first time. They were so stretchy, so lightweight, and so soft that they barely felt like I was wearing tights as all. However, by the end of the day, they were beginning to show signs of crotch sagging. By the end of the week, I was tugging at the hemline every time I stood up because they kept sliding southward.

The Verdict: For those that prefer a more luxurious-feeling tight that won't fritz out on you, these are your pair. They'll last you years, but if you're on the taller end or have a narrow waist, be forewarned that you might have crotch-fit issues. For $55, these are definitely expensive. But, I know women who've had their Wolfords for half a decade — think about all the cheap $5 hose you've destroyed in that long a time.

Illustrated by Anna Sudit.

Wolford Matte Opaque 80 Tights, $61, available at Neiman Marcus.

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Charlie Sheen Sort Of Apologizes To Rihanna: "Let's Have A Drink Someday"

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Photo: Charles Sykes/Bravo/NBCU Photo Bank/Getty Images.

Three years ago, Charlie Sheen went on a Twitter tirade against Rihanna after she declined to take a photo with the actor's then-fiancée while out to dinner. (In response, RiRi let him have it.) Last week, Sheen reignited the feud during Watch What Happens Live when he referred to the singer as "that bitch." (All of Twitter let him have it.)

Now, the 51-year-old is saying sorry — in a very Charlie Sheen sort of way. On Tuesday, Sheen tweeted, dear @rihanna, pardon my inane self indulgence. let's have a drink someday (on me) ...."

As you can see, no actual "I'm sorry" or "I apologize" here. But hey, Sheen at least seems to be admitting that he's in the wrong here. As for whether Rihanna is going to accept his "apology" or take him up on that drink offer? Let's not get ahead of ourselves now.

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This Mom Celebrated Her Daughter's First Period In A Huge Way

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Though getting your first period is a big deal for many of us, there's still a lot of stigma attached to something that's normal and completely natural. Instead of teaching her daughter that a period is something you need to hide, one Florida mom, Shelly Lee, celebrated her 12-year-old daughter Brooke's first period with a surprise party, complete with a cake.

Shelly told BuzzFeed that she threw the party because her daughter "was anxious to have her period. I wanted to make this event a little more fun!"

Brooke's cousin, Autumn, posted photos from the party to Twitter and the internet has since fallen in love with the Lees and their support for Brooke.

Autumn also told BuzzFeed that Shelly even put in the extra thought to make a chocolate cake, because it had "serotonin in it to help her with Brooke’s first period." Brooke was also given a hefty supply of tampons and pads during her party — and if you've ever had to buy menstrual products, you'll know that getting a free supply is about the best gift you can get.

Understandably, Autumn's tweet from the party has gone viral, as other Twitter users began heaping praise on the Lee family for teaching that getting your period is nothing to be ashamed of. In fact, it's cause for celebration. After all, getting your period isn't always fun, so why not make the most of it?

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Dressing Down Is The New Dressing Up, According To These 7 Celebs

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Whether you love 'em or hate 'em, leggings are considered pants. And, celebrities have had a large hand in taking them from Starbucks run to fashion zeitgeist. Aside from the few appearances on the runways of brands like 3.1 Philip Lim and Balmain, we really (really!) have power players like Kylie Jenner, Gigi Hadid, and Margot Robbie to thank for convincing us that stretchy bottoms look just as good with a leather jacket as they do with a sports bra.

These days, leggings aren't the only athletic item celebrities are turning to not just for the gym, but for their day-to-day. Often oversized, graphic, and paired with anything from ripped jeans to leather pants, hoodies have become the staple of starlets as they travel, run errands, and way more. That's why, we're taking this moment to make it official: Wearing a hoodie is just as bossy as wearing leggings as pants. This is how it's done.

Don't think that going baggy on top has to mean going skinny on the bottom. Kylie Jenner makes the case for a slightly oversized sweatsuit, and we dig it.

Photo: Jacson/Splash.

Oversized sunglasses, ripped jeans, and a pair of statement sneakers are all it takes to get Sofia Richie's girl-boss-on-the-go look.

Photo: Javiles/Bruce/FAMEFLYNET PICTURE.

The new matching set? We think yes. Champion and Vans go hand-in-hand, as Kourtney Kardashian so effortlessly demonstrates.

Photo: WCP/4CRNS/FAMEFLYNET PICTURES.

Khloe Kardashian shows some love for The Weeknd in her all-black everything airport look.

Photo: SMXRF/Star Max/GC Images.

With leather pants and Gucci slides, we have a feeling Gigi Hadid isn't headed to the treadmill.

Photo: James Devaney/GC Images.

She nails the groutfit, too.

Photo: Jacopo Raule/GC Images.

Leave it to Rihanna to make an outfit that could look so sloppy (complete with socks and slides) look so trendy. How does she do it?

Photo: starzfly/Bauer-Griffin/GC Images.

Hailey Baldwin sports a celebrity favorite: The Are You Am I Croft Hoodie. It's cropped and features extra-long, thick strings, making it way more suitable for a leather jacket pairing than a pajama pants one.

Photo: Raymond Hall/GC Images.

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5 Late-Night Snack Ideas That Won't Mess With Your Sleep

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Illustrated by Louisa Cannell.

You've already been tossing and turning for a few hours when your stomach starts to grumble. If falling asleep was tough before, you know it'll be basically impossible if your tummy's empty, too. But if you reach for the wrong kind of food, your snack of choice might make it even harder for you to get your ZZZs. So what's a sleepy, hungry person supposed to do?

"Food can absolutely help [your sleep], and it can absolutely hurt," says Lisa Young, PhD, RD, CDN, adjunct professor of nutrition at NYU Steinhardt. In general, large, protein-heavy meals tend to keep us awake because they take longer to digest, which can be physically uncomfortable. Alcohol and caffeine are also major late-night no-nos.

But when it comes to foods that help us fall asleep, Dr. Young says there's some variability from person to person, which means it may take some trial and error to find your perfect snack recipe. Foods that contain tryptophan (e.g. salmon and turkey) and melatonin (e.g. cherries) tend to calm us down. As do any warm drinks or soups, so feel free to heat up that glass of milk.

Beyond that, though, Dr. Young says "a good combination is a small amount of protein with carbs." Do your best to stick with whole grains and lean sources of protein, as these encourage the perfect digestion timing (not too fast and not too slow). But just because you're munching on brown rice doesn't mean you can still continue swiping through Instagram well beyond your bedtime and expect to wake up refreshed: Dr. Young says your other sleep hygiene habits will undoubtedly matter more than your meal choices.

Click through to see five examples of late-night snacks that won't keep you up — and might just lull you to sleep.

1. Banana Smoothie

A quick smoothie made with bananas, low-fat milk, and any other fruits you want to throw in there would be a great late-night option, Dr. Young says. The milk will give you just enough protein without being too heavy (as well as a bit of tryptophan). And the banana offers potassium, which can help you fall asleep.

Illustrated by Louisa Cannell.

2. Crackers With Almond Butter

Whole grain crackers (or bread) with almond or peanut butter hit that perfect protein/carb ratio. Plus, Dr. Young explains that the nut butter comes with magnesium, which can ease any muscle cramps that may be keeping you awake.

Illustrated by Louisa Cannell.

3. Yogurt With Cherries

Tart cherries are one of the few foods that naturally have melatonin in them, so feel free to have a few on their own. But if you need something a little more filling, Dr. Young suggests having them with a cup of yogurt. You might as well go Greek and get your probiotics too.

Illustrated by Louisa Cannell.

4. Butternut Squash Soup

Anything warm will calm you down, so soup is often a good idea. But Dr. Young doesn't recommend anything too heavy or too full of fiber at night because they can be tough to digest. So hold off on your lentils and and opt for nutrient-rich butternut squash instead.

Illustrated by Louisa Cannell.

5. Rice Cake With Cottage Cheese

Another excellent carb and protein combo, a rice cake with a bit of cottage cheese will leave you feeling full but comfy. You'll also get a healthy dose of calcium and tryptophan.

Illustrated by Louisa Cannell.

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We Finally Know What's Happening To Michelle Obama's Social Media Accounts

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Photo: Mark Wilson/Getty Images.

In addition to her epic dance moves and the success of her Let's Move! campaign, First Lady Michelle Obama has proven herself to be a strong force on social media. Her accounts across Twitter, Instagram, and Snapchat have been equally silly, inspiring, and encouraging. Her online presence has allowed the public to get to know Mrs. Obama on a deeper level, helping to cement her place as one of the most beloved first ladies in American history.

But, until now, it was unclear what Michelle Obama's social media presence would look like going forward. We knew only that Melania Trump would have the option to take over @FLOTUS and that Michelle Obama's past tweets as FLOTUS will transfer to @FLOTUS44, where will they will be archived by the National Archives and Records Administration. Similarly, on Instagram, @MichelleObama will be archived at @MichelleObama44. But where can we go to continue hearing from and following Michelle Obama out of office?

Today, the First Lady unveiled her plans for social media after she and the president leave 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue. Rest assured, she will continue to be active online.

"I see my social media accounts as a fun, accessible way people can get to know me directly," the first lady said in a statement to Refinery29. "And as I transition from First Lady to private citizen, I plan to keep reaching out to people from all backgrounds — particularly young people — through social media."

That connection will happen via four accounts. Look for @MichelleObama on Twitter and follow FLOTUS on Facebook at Facebook.com/MichelleObama — both will be reactivated starting after January 20, You can also keep up with her at Instagram.com/MichelleObama and MichelleObama on Snapchat.

To see where you can follow all other members of Obama's administration, head here.

Refinery29's Torey Van Oot contributed to this report.

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This Is The Lipstick To Wear If You're Going To The Women's March

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Don’t even bother asking “who run the world?” The answer is, and always will be, girls. (Though we prefer 'women,' we can't deny that it's not quite as catchy in lyrical form.) But girl power is so much more than a rah-rah catchphrase. In fact, it’s arguably more relevant now than ever. It’s a call to action, an inspiration, a reason to boost each other up and not tear each other down, and a constant reminder that the fight’s not over yet.

We’ll take every opportunity we can to celebrate women — and if it involves lip color, well, that’s just the icing on the cake. Clearly, cult-favorite makeup brand Hourglass is on the same page as us, because it just launched GIRL, a line of 20 lipsticks with seriously inspiring names. That's not all: There's a social media movement that urges women to recognize the good in others and in themselves behind it, too.

The #GIRLFORGOOD campaign encourages people to upload photos of themselves or their friends and tag them with one of the 20 shade names — you can choose from Believer, Creator, Explorer, Seeker, Peacemaker, Achiever, Influencer, Dreamer, Idealist, Futurist, Activist, Inventor, Lover, Innovator, Visionary, Icon, Leader, Liberator, Protector, and Warrior.

In doing this simple act of appreciation, Hourglass hopes that participants will be able to set off a flood of positivity. It’s exactly the kind of initiative we need to remind ourselves just how important it is to not only be kind to and supportive of our fellow humans, but also let our voices, purposes, and passions guide us to make big changes — and to never, ever shy away from a good red lip.

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Alicia Keys Finally Wore Makeup Again — For An Important Reason

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Photo: Taylor Hill/Getty Images.

A photo posted by Alicia Keys (@aliciakeys) on

Whether she intended to or not, Alicia Keys became the patron saint of the #nomakeup movement this year. Since announcing her right to rock a bare fac e, the songstress hasn't been spotted wearing a speck of lipstick, foundation, or cover-up — whether shopping for groceries or slaying a red carpet.

That is, until now. In this month's issue of Allure, the Grammy-winning singer was spotted wearing makeup for the first time in nearly a year. And we're not just talking about a swipe of mascara — Keys went bold. Although she appears bare-faced on the cover, inside you'll spot teal graphic eye s, an edgy take on bottom liner, and streaks of purple color etched across her orbital bone, all courtesy of her personal makeup artist Dotti Streeters.

She also dropped a line of wisdom that explains her decision. "I'm not a slave to makeup," she told Allure. "I'm not a slave to not wearing makeup either." Yes. Girl.

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